The Promise by Mahlatse Mokone (best ebook reader ubuntu txt) 📖

him

“Not a single word from you!” I shouted, “I have nothing to say to you.” I shrieked and he blinked a few times, a flurry of emotions passing in his eyes. Bewilderment, pain, regret?

I stared at him for a second and chuckled without humor, it sounded wrong, even to my ears as I held back tears. I refuse to cry.

“Leah was right, you’re an ass. They were all right, and deep down inside I knew it too. But shame on me for choosing not to believe it,” I said with quiet resignation. Suddenly I couldn’t stand the sight of both of them, I couldn’t stand to be here anymore. I turn on my heel and do what I do best.

I heard Brandon call after me and his footsteps follow as I quickly stalked back down the corridor. I carried my dress, vaguely aware that I was wearing high heels as I made my way towards the double doors and I pushed through them.

I warily welcomed the night breeze as I continued towards the car, “Katelyn please…” Brandon shouted after me running towards me now.

“Leave me alone!” I shouted back, my voice making a small echo through the empty parking lot “Don’t come anywhere near me.”

Tim must’ve seen me coming because he suddenly walked out of the car towards the back passenger door. His expression bemused but grave as he looked between me and a fast approaching Brandon.

“Take me home.” I whispered when I reached him, and I wasn’t even sure he heard me until he nodded stiffly and opened the door for me. I swiftly got in and he shut the door behind me. Turning to stop Brandon from getting any closer to the car. “I’m going to ask you to hold it right there.” I heard him say with an arctic voice. Brandon held up his hands then I couldn’t hear what Tim was saying to him anymore.

Brandon’s eyes were searching for me inside, looking like he wanted to leap away from Tim to get to me. I knew he couldn’t see me through the heavily tinted windows, he couldn’t see how much I was hurting, which provided a sense of comfort. Suddenly Brandon flinched looking back at Tim before he took a few steps back and I couldn’t look at him anymore. Tim made his way around the car and got in. I didn’t look at Brandon as the car pulled away from him.

Tim didn’t say anything in the ride back home only timidly asked if I was okay.

My body was on autopilot when I got back home.

I stopped in the entrance hall finding Mom with her feet up on the sofa and a glass of wine in hand; she was staring blankly at the TV. She looked distant, almost sad and I knew she missed Dad. Seeing her like that broke the dam and I started crying. Was I going to look like that from now on too? Missing Brandon and knowing I can’t be with him?

I couldn’t possibly compare myself to Mom, the love she and Dad have I could never fathom. But looking at her now, I considered if that was my fate as well and it hurt, knowing that unlike her, it wasn’t ending in the near future.

Mom’s head snapped to me and she stood up with a worried and pained but understanding look on her face. She knows, of course she knows.

I wondered if it was her maternal instincts kicking in, she held out her arms and I walked into them, crying a little harder and she sank us both back on the couch. She held me tightly and silently for a while until I calmed down, even then we sat like that, I appreciated the silent comfort. It meant more than anything she could say or do.

“Shh, I know it hurts sweetie.” She said softly and I looked up at her “Do you?” I asked and she nodded. “I said you were growing up, and sometimes getting hurt is part of that.” She said gently stroking my flushed cheek. “I hate seeing you like this, but I can’t stop it from happening.” She added. I sat despondently, keeping quiet.

“You want to tell me what happened?” she asked and I shook my head “Tomorrow?” she probed and I nodded, continuing my mute responses.

“I actually just want to go to bed.” I said my voice monotonous, Mom frowned but nodded “Alright sweetie, you need anything?” she asked and I shook my head standing up. “I love you.” She added when I started walking away.

I stopped then turned back to her, I kissed her forehead “I love you too Mom.” I said giving her hand a squeeze. I went up the stairs and found myself in my room. Last time I was here I was smiling, excited and hopeful for a great night, funny how those very beautiful moments can also turn sourly wrong.

I was exhausted to the point where I didn’t even have the energy to get out of my dress and undo my make up.

I fell into a troubled sleep.

 

 

After JT left for the day I sat on the counter of the huge kitchen island, slowly picking on my scrambled eggs. This Monday was gloomier than usual and I just didn’t want to face it, at all. But all things considered, I felt fine, almost even liberated. Or was that my autopilot self talking? I shrugged inwardly.

Dad came into the kitchen and kissed my forehead “Morning angel.” He said, his deep voice measured. I knew that Mom gave him the 411 on what happened Friday when he came home. He along with Mom and JT were cautious around me, it irritated me. I wasn’t sulking all weekend, was I? I know that I did everything I would normally do on any other day.

“Morning Dad.” I said as cheerfully as I could, meeting his assertive blue gaze. He was immaculately dressed in his charcoal grey business suit, his usually tousled ink black hair neatened. He looked powerful and untouchable; he also looked like my Dad. Then I saw it, concern and a little frustration? I sighed inwardly.

Dad has made it his life mission to protect my siblings and I and in this case he’s rendered helpless and I don’t think he’s coping well with that.

I knew then that a serious talk was imminent and he’s only giving me space for now, I’ll take it any day.

Just then Mom came in, looking professionally chic as usually in her black pencil skirt and red silk blouse, along with her high red pumps; her long hair in a low ponytail. “Hey sweetie.” She said to me with a smile “Hi Mom.” I said before she turned her smile on Dad and they shared a chaste kiss, Mom giggled when Dad playfully placed more kisses on her face.

I think they forgot about me for a moment, a small smile played at the corners of my lips. On any other day I would’ve made a snide sound or comment to stop them but they looked so happy. Somehow seeing them didn’t make me feel miserable; it gave me…hope. For what exactly, I have no idea.

I stood up from my chair “I have to go.” I said after a glance at my watch “Bye.” I said after they bid me a quick farewell.

I got in my Jag and started it but didn’t go, I couldn’t help but think back to the conversation I had with JT Sunday afternoon. I had to tell him about Adrianna, convince him to end things with her.

 

I looked at JT expectantly but he just watched me quietly and sympathetically, was that for me? “Are you okay?” he asked, his voice laced with concern and I started,

“JT, I just told you your girlfriend kissed another guy and…God knows what else and you ask how I’m doing?” I asked not quite believing his reaction, that’s just it, he wasn’t reacting, not the way I thought he would.

He shrugged impassively “Yes, I care about you here.” He said and I closed my eyes realization dawned on me. He was never in love with Adrianna; he didn’t care what she did. “You don’t care about her, do you?” I asked knowingly and he smiled “Come on Katelyn, I thought you knew me better than that. You really believe I could genuinely care about her, she’s not capable of caring about anyone but herself.” He said, amen to that! But I still didn’t understand.

“But then why go out with her?” I asked, and he shrugged “Ade might be cold but she’s easily influenced, I could control the way she and her friends treated you…most of the time.” He said and I made a double take, suddenly remembering the many times Adrianna would be nice just because he was close by.

“That’s crazy.” I breathed “Whoa, you took this whole big brother thing to the max didn’t you? Hell, you can’t do that JT.” I said and he chuckled at my vehemence. Then he held up his hands “Okay then, besides its ineffective.” He said then he sobered up “Anyway, I’m waiting for a better offer to come along.” He said distractedly. My gasp brought his attention back to me.

“You like Tess!” I said pointing at him as if that’ll make him admit it “I knew it!”

“What? Did she say anything?” he asked, he’s not denying it, wow.

“I…no, she didn’t.” I lied, I couldn’t tell him my best friend’s true feelings about him, she should do that. JT nodded and I saw a little hint of disappointment in his eyes, wow, he really does like her back.

“You should talk to her though.” I encouraged, at leased one of us should get what we want.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

CHAPTER 17

 

I parked my car next to Tess’ blue VW Polo; she got out and walked towards me. She hugged me tightly but briefly “Hi, I tried calling you yesterday but you didn’t pick up.” She said and I smiled apologetically. I was having a heart to heart with JT but I wasn’t about to tell her about him either.

I suddenly flinched remembering the dozens of missed calls Brandon left on my cell and voicemails I just deleted without listening to.

“Yeah I know, I’m sorry, I was in hibernation” I said and she chuckled “Even heartbroken you’re funny as hell, ladies and gentlemen the amazing Katelyn Gilbert.” She said and I bowed chuckling too, it felt good.

I was making progress, Friday was starting to fade like a bad dream but I knew seeing him today was going to set me back a few steps.

I felt like I was being watched but when I looked around nothing was out of the ordinary and no one seemed to be paying attention to me.

Tess and I made our way up the steps and into the building.

 

 

The day went by very slowly, but considerably normal, I was only anxious at lunch, knowing I’ll have to see Brandon but he wasn’t there. I don’t know if I was relieved or even more anxious. But now as I sat on my chair in art class, I just want to run back out.

You can do this Melanie, I chanted to myself as the class filled with students. I just have to get through a few more weeks and quarterly tests then I’m free to go on a three-week vacation. I need the distance and rest.

I looked up in time to see Mr. blonde and delicious enter the class, he looked like his usual handsome self, though he looked like he could use some sleep.

The small dark circles were hardly visible; you’d have to have spent a great deal of time studying him to notice the change. Like me I thought sadly, looking down. I felt his eyes on me as he made his way to his own desk.

“Katelyn…” he started softly after a pause and I shook my head silencing him “Don’t.” I said in the same tone without turning to look at him.

I was