Eric by Jody Kaye (e book reader txt) 📖

part of my body not hurt? What ever happened to glowing and all those happy pregnant women in advertisements? I bet none of them ever talked about placentas or postpartum depression outside of birthing class. The only one enjoying my melon breasts—which are always in the way and nearly as big as my stomach—is Eric. My fingers look like cucumbers and grapes are hanging out of my…Let’s not go there.

I’m a hormone-induced cornucopia of side effects and symptoms. However, whenever I think about grumbling, I remind myself I’m responsible for what’s happening to my body. I also refuse to wish these last few weeks away.

During a hospital visit, we toured the neonatal intensive care nursery. Adding stress to our plates and making Eric worry if the baby comes too early isn’t okay by me. When the time is right, it’ll happen. I figure being uncomfortable now still beats middle of the night feedings.

I wound up wearing maternity jeans and an oversized sweater Thanksgiving dinner at Kingsbrier, resembling one of the guys, instead of being as coiffed as Miss Rose. It was embarrassing wondering what everyone else around the dinner table thought of my appearance, especially this morning as Eric holds up a printed maternity shirt. “I got you this. Well, Brier and Daveigh picked it out, but I paid for it.”

“You should’ve waited to give me something so nice.” I running my fingers over the soft fabric. 

“Think of it as an early Christmas gift.”

“We agreed on no gifts. You’re trying to show me up for telling you the baby was a boy.” The lilt in my voice is mixed with guilt and trepidation. I won’t be wearing it much more than a month.

“Nope. I thought you might want to look as pretty today as you are to me every day.”

I drape the shirt over my stomach, admiring the blue color in the mirror. We’ll be seeing a lot of it in the coming year.

“It probably looks better on.” He slips his arms around my middle, holding me tightly from behind.

“I love it, but there is no reason to wear it.” It would have looked lovely yesterday.

“Sure there is.” Eric lifts his wrist, showing me his watch. “I have a half hour to get you up to the house.”

“Why?” Then it dawns on me why I have the busiest shopping day of the year off. “They aren’t?”

“They are. I wasn’t supposed to tell you, but then your momma—”

“What about her?” I pull away, cross.

My mother drives me nuts coming through my register line. The best days are the ones I watch the woman wait and my managers send me on a break as it’s Diana’s turn to check out.

“My mother invited her to the baby shower.” 

My emotions go haywire. I’m beyond thrilled and surprised the Cavanaughs are throwing a party for Eric’s…I’m not using that hateful word. The way I already feel about our baby is indescribable. Someone insinuating he isn’t enough, when next to Eric, he’s just about the most amazing thing to ever happened to me, turns me into a raging monster.

My mother let her husband say things against our child. How could Miss Rose have included that sort of ugliness?

“Thank you, but I don’t think I’ll stay here.” I sit on the edge of the bed and crumple the shirt in my lap.

People giving gifts seems like charity. As much as a baby needs, the last thing I can bear is hearing I’ve accepted a handout.

The whispers continue in town accusing me of cheating Eric Cavanaugh out of his money. After our bills are paid each month there’s about enough left to splurge on Chinese takeout. That’s how rich we are right now. The rest gets saved for diapers and medical co-pays. All of those no-fun things add up; The stuff the smart senior class valedictorian hadn’t given a thought to when she became focused on losing the love of her life and wound up ruining his.

“My sisters gathered all your friends up there. Do you know what will happen to me if I don’t get you there on time?” He squeezes my knee. “Sugar, most people are excited for us now. For the life of me, I don’t understand it because from one day to the next I’m either okay with becoming a dad or terrified I don’t have it in me. But thumbing our noses at them? Saying they didn’t believe in us then, so why let them celebrate now? It’s harsh.”

“You believe in us?”

He puts an arm around me and kisses my temple. “For as mad as you made me, I never stopped. Don’t let one bad choice ruin your relationship with your mother for all time. Give her the benefit of the doubt and don’t judge her on your stepfather’s behavior. Gin, you asked me to find the grace to forgive you. Find it in yourself to do that for her.”

I cover my mouth stepping into the foyer of the main house. Blue streamers hang from the ceiling meeting at the chandelier. A tall stork with a blue bundle in his mouth directs guests to the formal living room and the smell of the food coming from the chafing dishes in the dining room makes my mouth water.

“I told you it’s perfect!” Daveigh pronounces to Eric seeing me in the blue shirt. She holds my arms out for the full effect and bends, giving instructions on proper behavior at a party to her nephew in utero. “Your dad and uncles are bad examples, even Brier I’d question, but basically, kiddo, today all you need to do today is stay right where you are.”

“I heard that!” Brier calls from beyond wide-hung double doors in the living room. “Get in here, y’all got to see all this amazing stuff!”

Stacks of gifts surrounded a mahogany stained crib with intricate scrollwork. It’s nothing like the one I’ve eyed in the baby department in the store. This is one of those pieces people lay their babies to sleep in generation after generation. It’s a stunning centerpiece.

“Your momma got the crib for you.” Rose rests a warm palm on my shoulder.

It can’t be true. My stepfather wouldn’t allow her to spend that amount of money.

As if by magic, my mother appears. She’s gaunt and older than I remember her being a year ago. 

“I put a five or ten aside every week, thinking maybe there’d be enough to buy extra diapers. Each penny added up. When I counted what was there it was more than I expected. If you don’t like it, I could always see if I can get a ref—”

I pick my jaw up off the floor. It isn’t the extravagance of the gift I appreciate. It’s for as tall as the wall I constructed to keep my mother away, Diana continued to want to do something for the baby. “It’s beautiful, Momma. Thank you.”

“I told Alan he doesn’t have to be a part of this baby’s life. But I want to be. If you’ll let me.”

“I think we could figure out something,” I reach for the arms that once safely held me.

Momma winces as she pulls away from the hug. On her elbow is a fading bruise, shaded in black, blue, and purple. The edges are yellow with a summer green tint.

“It’s nothing, Darlin’,” she reassures me, but not before I spy a flash of regret. “A bookcase fell at work and clumsy me was in the way as it toppled over. It’ll be right as rain in no time, you’ll see.” She smiles and leads me across the room to open gifts.