Accelerando by Charles Stross (books to read in a lifetime .txt) đ
- Author: Charles Stross
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table. Someone is sitting opposite him. He glances up incuriously and
freezes inside.
âMorning, Manfred. How does it feel to owe the government twelve
million, three hundred and sixty-two thousand, nine hundred and
sixteen dollars and fifty-one cents?â She smiles a Mona Lisa smile, at
once affectionate and challenging.
Manfred puts everything in his sensorium on indefinite hold and stares
at her. Sheâs immaculately turned out in a formal gray business suit:
brown hair tightly drawn back, blue eyes quizzical. And as beautiful
as ever: tall, ash blonde, with features that speak of an unexplored
modeling career. The chaperone badge clipped to her lapel - a due
diligence guarantee of businesslike conduct - is switched off. Heâs
feeling ripped because of the dead kitten and residual jet lag, and
more than a little messy, so he snarls back at her; âThatâs a bogus
estimate! Did they send you here because they think Iâll listen to
you?â He bites and swallows a slice of cheese-laden crispbread: âOr
did you decide to deliver the message in person just so you could ruin
my breakfast?â
âManny.â She frowns, pained. âIf youâre going to be confrontational, I
might as well go now.â She pauses, and after a moment he nods
apologetically. âI didnât come all this way just because of an overdue
tax estimate.â
âSo.â He puts his coffee cup down warily and thinks for a moment,
trying to conceal his unease and turmoil. âThen what brings you here?
Help yourself to coffee. Donât tell me you came all this way just to
tell me you canât live without me.â
She fixes him with a riding-crop stare: âDonât flatter yourself. There
are many leaves in the forest, there are ten thousand hopeful subs in
the chat room, et cetera. If I choose a man to contribute to my family
tree, the one thing you can be certain of is he wonât be a cheapskate
when it comes to providing for his children.â
âLast I heard, you were spending a lot of time with Brian,â he says
carefully. Brian: a name without a face. Too much money, too little
sense. Something to do with a blue-chip accountancy partnership.
âBrian?â She snorts. âThat ended ages ago. He turned weird on me -
burned my favorite corset, called me a slut for going clubbing, wanted
to fuck me. Saw himself as a family man: one of those promise-keeper
types. I crashed him hard, but I think he stole a copy of my address
book - got a couple of friends say he keeps sending them harassing
mail.â
âThereâs a lot of it about these days.â Manfred nods, almost
sympathetically, although an edgy little corner of his mind is
gloating. âGood riddance, then. I suppose this means youâre still
playing the scene? But looking around for the, er -â
âTraditional family thing? Yes. Your trouble, Manny? You were born
forty years too late: You still believe in rutting before marriage but
find the idea of coping with the after-effects disturbing.â
Manfred drinks the rest of his coffee, unable to reply effectively to
her non sequitur. Itâs a generational thing. This generation is happy
with latex and leather, whips and butt plugs and electrostim, but find
the idea of exchanging bodily fluids shocking: a social side effect of
the last centuryâs antibiotic abuse. Despite being engaged for two
years, he and Pamela never had intromissive intercourse.
âI just donât feel positive about having children,â he says
eventually. âAnd Iâm not planning on changing my mind anytime soon.
Things are changing so fast that even a twenty-year commitment is too
far to plan - you might as well be talking about the next ice age. As
for the money thing, I am reproductively fit - just not within the
parameters of the outgoing paradigm. Would you be happy about the
future if it was 1901 and youâd just married a buggy-whip mogul?â
Her fingers twitch, and his ears flush red; but she doesnât follow up
the double entendre. âYou donât feel any responsibility, do you? Not
to your country, not to me. Thatâs what this is about: None of your
relationships count, all this nonsense about giving intellectual
property away notwithstanding. Youâre actively harming people you
know. That twelve mil isnât just some figure I pulled out of a hat,
Manfred; they donât actually expect you to pay it. But itâs almost
exactly how much youâd owe in income tax if youâd only come home,
start up a corporation, and be a self-made -â
âI donât agree. Youâre confusing two wholly different issues and
calling them both âresponsibility.â And I refuse to start charging
now, just to balance the IRSâs spreadsheet. Itâs their fucking fault,
and they know it. If they hadnât gone after me under suspicion of
running a massively ramified microbilling fraud when I was sixteen -â
âBygones.â She waves a hand dismissively. Her fingers are long and
slim, sheathed in black glossy gloves - electrically earthed to
prevent embarrassing emissions. âWith a bit of the right advice we can
get all that set aside. Youâll have to stop bumming around the world
sooner or later, anyway. Grow up, get responsible, and do the right
thing. This is hurting Joe and Sue; they donât understand what youâre
about.â
Manfred bites his tongue to stifle his first response, then refills
his coffee cup and takes another mouthful. His heart does a flip-flop:
Sheâs challenging him again, always trying to own him. âI work for the
betterment of everybody, not just some narrowly defined national
interest, Pam. Itâs the agalmic future. Youâre still locked into a
presingularity economic model that thinks in terms of scarcity.
Resource allocation isnât a problem anymore - itâs going to be over
within a decade. The cosmos is flat in all directions, and we can
borrow as much bandwidth as we need from the first universal bank of
entropy! They even found signs of smart matter - MACHOs, big brown
dwarfs in the galactic halo, leaking radiation in the long infrared -
suspiciously high entropy leakage. The latest figures say something
like seventy percent of the baryonic mass of the M31 galaxy was in
computronium, two-point-nine million years ago, when the photons weâre
seeing now set out. The intelligence gap between us and the aliens is
a probably about a trillion times bigger than the gap between us and a
nematode worm. Do you have any idea what that means?â
Pamela nibbles at a slice of crispbread, then graces him with a slow,
carnivorous stare. âI donât care: Itâs too far away to have any
influence on us, isnât it? It doesnât matter whether I believe in that
singularity you keep chasing, or your aliens a thousand light-years
away. Itâs a chimera, like Y2K, and while youâre running after it, you
arenât helping reduce the budget deficit or sire a family, and thatâs
what I care about. And before you say I only care about it because
thatâs the way Iâm programmed, I want you to ask just how dumb you
think I am. Bayesâ Theorem says Iâm right, and you know it.â
âWhat you -â He stops dead, baffled, the mad flow of his enthusiasm
running up against the coffer dam of her certainty. âWhy? I mean, why?
Why on earth should what I do matter to you?â Since you canceled our
engagement, he doesnât add.
She sighs. âManny, the Internal Revenue cares about far more than you
can possibly imagine. Every tax dollar raised east of the Mississippi
goes on servicing the debt, did you know that? Weâve got the biggest
generation in history hitting retirement and the cupboard is bare. We
- our generation - isnât producing enough skilled workers to replace
the taxpayer base, either, not since our parents screwed the public
education system and outsourced the white-collar jobs. In ten years,
something like thirty percent of our population are going to be
retirees or silicon rust belt victims. You want to see seventy year
olds freezing on street corners in New Jersey? Thatâs what your
attitude says to me: Youâre not helping to support them, youâre
running away from your responsibilities right now, when weâve got huge
problems to face. If we can just defuse the debt bomb, we could do so
much - fight the aging problem, fix the environment, heal societyâs
ills. Instead you just piss away your talents handing no-hoper
Eurotrash get-rich-quick schemes that work, telling Vietnamese
zaibatsus what to build next to take jobs away from our taxpayers. I
mean, why? Why do you keep doing this? Why canât you simply come home
and help take responsibility for your share of it?â
They share a long look of mutual incomprehension.
âLook,â she says awkwardly, âIâm around for a couple of days. I really
came here for a meeting with a rich neurodynamics tax exile whoâs just
been designated a national asset - Jim Bezier. Donât know if youâve
heard of him, but Iâve got a meeting this morning to sign his tax
jubilee, then after that Iâve got two daysâ vacation coming up and not
much to do but some shopping. And, you know, Iâd rather spend my money
where itâll do some good, not just pumping it into the EU. But if you
want to show a girl a good time and can avoid dissing capitalism for
about five minutes at a stretch -â
She extends a fingertip. After a momentâs hesitation, Manfred extends
a fingertip of his own. They touch, exchanging vCards and
instant-messaging handles. She stands and stalks from the breakfast
room, and Manfredâs breath catches at a flash of ankle through the
slit in her skirt, which is long enough to comply with workplace
sexual harassment codes back home. Her presence conjures up memories
of her tethered passion, the red afterglow of a sound thrashing. Sheâs
trying to drag him into her orbit again, he thinks dizzily. She knows
she can have this effect on him any time she wants: Sheâs got the
private keys to his hypothalamus, and sod the metacortex. Three
billion years of reproductive determinism have given her
twenty-first-century ideology teeth: If sheâs finally decided to
conscript his gametes into the war against impending population crash,
heâll find it hard to fight back. The only question: Is it business or
pleasure? And does it make any difference, anyway?
*
Manfredâs mood of dynamic optimism is gone, broken by the knowledge
that his vivisectionist stalker has followed him to Amsterdam - to say
nothing of Pamela, his dominatrix, source of so much yearning and so
many morning-after weals. He slips his glasses on, takes the universe
off hold, and tells it to take him for a long walk while he catches up
on the latest on the tensor-mode gravitational waves in the cosmic
background radiation (which, it is theorized, may be waste heat
generated by irreversible computational processes back during the
inflationary epoch; the present-day universe being merely the data
left behind by a really huge calculation). And then thereâs the
weirdness beyond M31: According to the more conservative cosmologists,
an alien superpower - maybe a collective of Kardashev Type Three
galaxy-spanning civilizations - is running a timing channel attack on
the computational ultrastructure of space-time itself, trying to break
through to whateverâs underneath. The tofu-Alzheimerâs link can wait.
The Centraal Station is almost obscured by smart, self-extensible
scaffolding and warning placards; it bounces up and down slowly,
victim of an overnight hit-and-run rubberization. His glasses direct
him toward one of the tour boats that lurk in the canal. Heâs about to
purchase a ticket when a messenger window blinks open. âManfred Macx?â
âAck?â
âAm sorry about yesterday. Analysis dictat incomprehension
mutualized.â
âAre you the same KGB AI that phoned me yesterday?â
âDa. However, believe you
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