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/> usually a cheerful person -- or at least a fat and smiling person. Alan
realized for the first time that the two weren't equivalent.

George jutted his chin toward the sofa and his brothers. "They don't
know what they want to do. They think that, 'cause it'll be hard to live
here, we should hide out in the cave forever."

"Alan, talk to him," Fred said. "He's nuts."

"Look," George said. "You're gone. You're *all* gone. The king under the
mountain now is Davey. If we stay there, we'll end up his slaves or his
victims. Let him keep it. There's a whole world out here we can live in.

"I don't see any reason to let my handicap keep me down."

"It's not a handicap," Edward said patiently. "It's just how we
are. We're different. We're not like the rest of them."

"Neither is Alan," George said. "And here he is, in the big city, living
with them. Working. Meeting people. Out of the mountain."

"Alan's more like them than he is like us," Frederick said. "We're not
like them. We can't pass for them."

Alan's jaw hung slack. Handicapped? Passing? Like them? Not like them?
He'd never thought of his brothers this way. They were just his
brothers. Just his family. They could communicate with the outside
world. They were people. Different, but the same.

"You're just as good as they are," he said.

And that shut them up. They all regarded him, as if waiting for him to
go on. He didn't know what to say. Were they, really? Was he? Was he
better?

"What are we, Alan?" Edward said it, but Frederick and George mouthed
the words after he'd said them.

"You're my brothers," he said. "You're. . ."

"I want to see the city," George said. "You two can come with me, or you
can meet me when I come back."

"You *can't* go without us," Frederick said. "What if we get hungry?"

"You mean, what if I don't come back, right?"

"No," Frederick said, his face turning red.

"Well, how hungry are you going to get in a couple hours? You're just
worried that I'm going to wander off and not come back. Fall into a
hole. Meet a girl. Get drunk. And you won't ever be able to eat again."
He was pacing again.

Ed and Fred looked imploringly at him.

"Why don't we all go together?" Alan said. "We'll go out and do
something fun -- how about ice-skating?"

"Skating?" George said. "Jesus, I didn't ride a bus for 30 hours just to
go *skating*."

Edward said, "I want to sleep."

Frederick said, "I want dinner."

Perfect, Alan thought. "Perfect. We'll all be equally displeased with
this, then. The skating's out in front of City Hall. There are lots of
people there, and we can take the subway down. We'll have dinner
afterward on Queen Street, then turn in early and get a good night's
sleep. Tomorrow, we'll negotiate something else. Maybe Chinatown and the
zoo."

They are stared at him.

"This is a limited-time offer," Alan said. "I had other plans tonight,
you know. Going once, going twice --"

"Let's go," George said. He went and took his brothers' hands. "Let's
go, okay?"

They had a really good time.

#

George's body was propped up at the foot of the bed. He was white and
wrinkled as a big toe in a bathtub, skin pulled tight in his face so
that his hairline and eyebrows and cheeks seemed raised in surprise.

Alan smelled him now, a stink like a mouse dead between the gyprock in
the walls, the worst smell imaginable. He felt Mimi breathing behind
him, her chest heaving against his back. He reached out and pushed aside
the wings, moving them by their translucent membranes, fingers brushing
the tiny fingerlets at the wingtips, recognizing in their touch some
evolutionary connection with his own hands.

George toppled over as Alan stepped off the bed, moving in the twilight
of the light from under the bathroom door. Mimi came off the bed on the
other side and hit the overhead light switch, turning the room as bright
as an icebox, making Alan squint painfully. She closed the blinds
quickly, then went to the door and shot the chain and the deadbolt
closed.

Mimi looked down at him. "Ugly sumbitch, whoever he was."

"My brother," Alan said.

"Oh," she said. She went back around the bed and sat on the edge, facing
the wall. "Sorry." She crossed her leg and jiggled her foot, making the
springs squeak.

Alan wasn't listening. He knelt down and touched George's cheek. The
skin was soft and spongy, porous and saturated. Cold. His fingertips
came away with shed white flakes of translucent skin clinging to them.

"Davey?" Alan said. "Are you in here?"

Mimi's foot stilled. They both listened intently. There were night-time
sounds in the motel, distant muffled TVs and car engines and fucking,
but no sound of papery skin thudding on ground-down carpet.

"He must have come up through the drain," Alan said. "In the bathroom."
The broad pale moon of George's belly was abraded in long grey stripes.

He stood and, wiping his hand on his bare thigh, reached for the
bathroom doorknob. The door swung open, revealing the
sanitized-for-your-protection brightness of the bathroom, the water
sloshed on the floor by Mimi earlier, the heaps of damp towels.

"How'd he find us here?"

Mimi, in her outsized blazer and track pants, touched him on his bare
shoulder. He suddenly felt terribly naked. He backed out of the
bathroom, shoving Mimi aside, and numbly pulled on his jeans and a
shapeless sweatshirt that smelled of Mimi and had long curly hairs
lurking in the fabric that stuck to his face like cobwebs. He jammed his
feet into his sneakers.

He realized that he'd had to step over his brother's body six times to
do this.

He looked at his brother again. He couldn't make sense of what he was
seeing. The abraded belly. The rictus. His balls, shrunk to an albino
walnut, his cock shriveled up to unrecognizability. The hair, curly,
matted all over his body, patchily rubbed away.

He paced in the little run beside the bed, the only pacing room he had
that didn't require stepping over George's body, back and forth, two
paces, turn, two paces, turn.

"I'm going to cover him up," Mimi said.

"Good, fine," Alan said.

"Are you going to be okay?"

"Yes, fine," Alan said.

"Are you freaking out?"

Alan didn't say anything.

George looked an awful lot like Davey had, the day they killed him.

#

Mimi found a spare blanket in the closet, reeking of mothballs and
scarred with a few curdled cigarette burns, and she spread it out on the
floor and helped him lift Grant's body onto it and wind it tightly
around him.

"What now?" she said.

He looked down at the wound sheet, the lump within it. He sat down
heavily on the bed. His chest was tight, and his breath came in short
*hup*s.

She sat beside him and put an arm around his shoulder, tried to pull his
head down to her bosom, but he stiffened his neck.

"I knew this was coming," he said. "When we killed Darren, I knew."

She stood and lit a cigarette. "This is your family business," she said,
"why we're driving up north?"

He nodded, not trusting his voice, seeing the outlines of Grad's face,
outlined in moth-eaten blanket.

"So," she said. "Let's get up north, then. Take an end."

The night was cold, and they staggered under the weight of the body
wound in the blanket and laid him out in the trunk of the car, shifting
luggage and picnic supplies to the back seat. At two a.m., the motel
lights were out and the road was dark and silent but for the soughing of
wind and the distant sounds of night animals.

"Are you okay to drive?" she said, as she piled their clothes
indiscriminately into the suitcases.

"What?" he said. The cool air on his face was waking him up a little,
but he was still in a dream-universe. The air was spicy and outdoors and
it reminded him powerfully of home and simpler times.

He looked at Mimi without really seeing her.

"Are you okay to drive?"

The keys were in his hands, the car smelling of the detailing-in-a-can
mist that the rental agency sprayed on the upholstery to get rid of the
discount traveler farts between rentals.

"I can drive," he said. Home, and the mountain, and the washing machine,
and the nook where he'd slept for 18 years, and the golems, and the
cradle they'd hewn for him. Another ten or twelve hours' driving and
they'd be at the foot of the trail where the grass grew to waist-high.

"Well, then, *drive*." She got in the car and slammed her door.

He climbed in, started the engine, and put the hertzmobile into reverse.

#

Two hours later, he realized that he was going to nod off. The thumps of
the body sliding in the trunk and the suitcases rattling around in the
back seat had lost their power to keep him awake.

The body's thumping had hardly had the power to begin with. Once the
initial shock had passed, the body became an object only, a thing, a
payload he had to deliver. Alan wondered if he was capable of feeling
the loss.

"You were eleven then," he said. It was suddenly as though no time had
past since they'd sat on the bed and she'd told him about Auntie.

"Yes," she said. "It was as though no time had passed."

A shiver went up his back.

He was wide awake.

"No time had passed."

"Yes. I was living with a nice family in Oakville who were sending me to
a nice girls' school where we wore blazers over our tunics, and I had a
permanent note excusing me from gym classes. In a building full of four
hundred girls going through puberty, one more fat shy girl who wouldn't
take her top off was hardly noteworthy."

"The family, they were nice. WASPy. They called me Cheryl. With a
Why. When I asked them where I'd been before, about 'Auntie,' they
looked sad and hurt and worried for me, and I learned to stop. They
hugged me and touched my wings and never said anything -- and never
wiped their hands on their pants after touching them. They gave me a
room with a computer and a CD player and a little TV of my own, and
asked me to bring home my friends.

"I had none.

"But they found other girls who would come to my 'birthday' parties, on
May 1, which was exactly two months after their son's birthday and two
months before their daughter's birthday.

"I can't remember any of their names.

"But they made me birthday cards and they made me breakfast and dinner
and they made me welcome. I could watch them grilling burgers in the
back yard by the above ground pool in the summer from my bedroom
window. I could watch them building forts or freezing skating rinks in
the winter. I could listen to them eating dinner together while I did my
homework in my bedroom. There was a place for me at the dinner-table,
but I couldn't sit there, though I can't remember why."

"Wait
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