30 Days to Find a Cure by Rebeca Night (reading books for 5 year olds .TXT) ๐
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hard to even speak to Raul with out showing my anger toward him which is what he wants. I feel horribly bad for his mentor. Dr. Patsona is the best in the business next to only Isabella's and mine. Our mentors went to collage together. So they know each other well.
July/13/2025
The meeting with My mentor went horrible. I left feeling very helpless. He told me all about Raul and his mentor. There is no way for me to be prepared to face him. We are having a teleconference with Raul's mentor to discus this but Raul is at the moment in the same state as Isabella which makes me more worried that my nightmare may just be correct. This is of course not what I wanted to hear. I just hope that Dr. Patsona can help me out with this. He knows his own student better then anyone. Now all I must think on is Isabella for if I just look at Raul and his stuff then I may just hurt myself. That and my mentor gave me some news today that can help but hurt me too in Isabella's mind. But for now I think I should just get all my tests done so that I will be ready. The doctors are working with me from now till we meet when I am starting my journey. I have to be as strong physically as I am mentally. Which to my surprise I am very smart and strong when using my head. I was further more shocked when Isabella's very own doctor told me that I could take up a job were Isabella works and possible be higher up then her. Isabella was always told and looked at as the best of the best. Till tomorrow I must rest again.
July/14/2025
The meeting went well but I wish that I would not have asked about if another person who is in the state and Isabella and Raul could mingle into each others minds. I was very sad to hear that yes they could and because they are family it would be like opening a door for Raul. My mentor and Raul's of course asked what this was all about and I just had to tell them that I was seeing if I could attempt this too. For at least a while they were thrown off or at least my mentor was. I could tell that Raul's mentor was very interested in me. It was weird but I felt kinda like Isabella at that moment. When I get her I must tell her of all that is happening now or maybe even just let her read this Journal. I mean its weird but in a way its for her. I just hope that as the days come closer that I am more and more prepared for what lies ahead once I am in her mind. I am still scared of what may be awaiting me there. Yet after the talk me and my mentor had it seems as though it will be easier for me to get into Isabella's mind with out hurting her or me. Now my only thought is if it is possible for me to kill Raul while I am there. I still feel that with out a doubt Raul is in my sweet Isabella's brain. No matter how much it disgusts me to think of having to be any were near Raul. I hate seeing his face in my nightmares (which will not go away now) and even hearing or thinking about him. I keep finding my self wishing that Isabella will just find her way out unharmed and be back here with me in my arms. I promise that when I do get her back into the real world I will hold her and never let go. If any one tries to make me part form her they will find themselves treated just as Raul will be if Isabella is harmed in anyway. I just hope for my sake and Isabella's that Raul is not inside her mind or any were near her. I hope that if it is like a door I hope Raul has not found that door yet and never will.
July/15/2025
Yesterday was big but the talk with my mentor is the one thing that sticks out the most in my mind. He asked many questions like "Why did you feel so strongly about talking to Raul or his mentor?" or "Why did you ask if Raul could get into Isabella's mind?" "Is there something you are not telling me?" He pounded me with these question and I just finally decided it would probably be better to just show him any ways. I handed him this Journal and let him read my posts. He seemed very stiff and concerned after that. He said that if I feel that I may be put into the situation with Raul he says that me and him need to work on that then instead of just my mental strength. For me it seems that he may just be keeping something from me. Which you would think if I am the one exploring in this and risking my life as well as the woman I loves life that I should know. Then again I did not feel like pushing the issue besides all mentors are matched to who they train so that noting would happen like secrets or worse fights. So if it was really an issue he would tell me wouldn't he? I mean I know that I kept my dream but that was cause I did not want it to be true the one trick I have learned is you think whatever you want to happen and it just might. So I was really just trying to make sure that I did not do this to myself in anyway. Though I feel it may be good for me. I feel kinda bad at this point though. I have not gone to see Isabella in awhile due to stress and being just plain busy. I know it is wrong of me being that I am doing this to get her back here with me and our friends. She has to come back even if she found out that we do not belong. I would even go to save her and bring her back even if it meant not being with her. I could at least know she is safe and well in this world were she belongs. I must sleep but I plan to visit her tomorrow.
July/16/2025
I have only 18 days left till I go in and try to save Isabella and possibly have to face Raul. I have been thinking about that a lot the passed few training sessions manly just because my mentor makes me train especially for that encounter. It is hard to try to refuse an idea when it is pounded into your head as a possibility for so long. The training is rather easy but it still leaves me very emotionally tired. My mentor sees how tired and run down I get and has told me that he worries I may need more time as well as sleep. He has requested I write at lunch instead of night and that we meant 6 times a day now instead of our normal 4 he says the two more hours could help a lot. To me it says "Ya I am worried you may fail so we NEED this to make sure you will not or at least not as badly." With all of this I do not know what to do. I am meeting with my mentor more and will get more sleep but as for writing during lunch I can not. I find it odd but even though this is weird to write in a journal I feel as if you are less a book and more just a really quite person who just wants nothing better to do then listen. It gives me a sort of peace to think of this journal this way makes it more special I guess. I do wish that you could write back to me though. It would indeed help me to figure out this predicament I am in. Yet I find nothing written back. I do so much miss Isabella's company, she knew what I felt and why. This is why at all cost I will save her. Now I must go though, I have more training then I am visiting Isabella.
July/17/2025
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July/13/2025
The meeting with My mentor went horrible. I left feeling very helpless. He told me all about Raul and his mentor. There is no way for me to be prepared to face him. We are having a teleconference with Raul's mentor to discus this but Raul is at the moment in the same state as Isabella which makes me more worried that my nightmare may just be correct. This is of course not what I wanted to hear. I just hope that Dr. Patsona can help me out with this. He knows his own student better then anyone. Now all I must think on is Isabella for if I just look at Raul and his stuff then I may just hurt myself. That and my mentor gave me some news today that can help but hurt me too in Isabella's mind. But for now I think I should just get all my tests done so that I will be ready. The doctors are working with me from now till we meet when I am starting my journey. I have to be as strong physically as I am mentally. Which to my surprise I am very smart and strong when using my head. I was further more shocked when Isabella's very own doctor told me that I could take up a job were Isabella works and possible be higher up then her. Isabella was always told and looked at as the best of the best. Till tomorrow I must rest again.
July/14/2025
The meeting went well but I wish that I would not have asked about if another person who is in the state and Isabella and Raul could mingle into each others minds. I was very sad to hear that yes they could and because they are family it would be like opening a door for Raul. My mentor and Raul's of course asked what this was all about and I just had to tell them that I was seeing if I could attempt this too. For at least a while they were thrown off or at least my mentor was. I could tell that Raul's mentor was very interested in me. It was weird but I felt kinda like Isabella at that moment. When I get her I must tell her of all that is happening now or maybe even just let her read this Journal. I mean its weird but in a way its for her. I just hope that as the days come closer that I am more and more prepared for what lies ahead once I am in her mind. I am still scared of what may be awaiting me there. Yet after the talk me and my mentor had it seems as though it will be easier for me to get into Isabella's mind with out hurting her or me. Now my only thought is if it is possible for me to kill Raul while I am there. I still feel that with out a doubt Raul is in my sweet Isabella's brain. No matter how much it disgusts me to think of having to be any were near Raul. I hate seeing his face in my nightmares (which will not go away now) and even hearing or thinking about him. I keep finding my self wishing that Isabella will just find her way out unharmed and be back here with me in my arms. I promise that when I do get her back into the real world I will hold her and never let go. If any one tries to make me part form her they will find themselves treated just as Raul will be if Isabella is harmed in anyway. I just hope for my sake and Isabella's that Raul is not inside her mind or any were near her. I hope that if it is like a door I hope Raul has not found that door yet and never will.
July/15/2025
Yesterday was big but the talk with my mentor is the one thing that sticks out the most in my mind. He asked many questions like "Why did you feel so strongly about talking to Raul or his mentor?" or "Why did you ask if Raul could get into Isabella's mind?" "Is there something you are not telling me?" He pounded me with these question and I just finally decided it would probably be better to just show him any ways. I handed him this Journal and let him read my posts. He seemed very stiff and concerned after that. He said that if I feel that I may be put into the situation with Raul he says that me and him need to work on that then instead of just my mental strength. For me it seems that he may just be keeping something from me. Which you would think if I am the one exploring in this and risking my life as well as the woman I loves life that I should know. Then again I did not feel like pushing the issue besides all mentors are matched to who they train so that noting would happen like secrets or worse fights. So if it was really an issue he would tell me wouldn't he? I mean I know that I kept my dream but that was cause I did not want it to be true the one trick I have learned is you think whatever you want to happen and it just might. So I was really just trying to make sure that I did not do this to myself in anyway. Though I feel it may be good for me. I feel kinda bad at this point though. I have not gone to see Isabella in awhile due to stress and being just plain busy. I know it is wrong of me being that I am doing this to get her back here with me and our friends. She has to come back even if she found out that we do not belong. I would even go to save her and bring her back even if it meant not being with her. I could at least know she is safe and well in this world were she belongs. I must sleep but I plan to visit her tomorrow.
July/16/2025
I have only 18 days left till I go in and try to save Isabella and possibly have to face Raul. I have been thinking about that a lot the passed few training sessions manly just because my mentor makes me train especially for that encounter. It is hard to try to refuse an idea when it is pounded into your head as a possibility for so long. The training is rather easy but it still leaves me very emotionally tired. My mentor sees how tired and run down I get and has told me that he worries I may need more time as well as sleep. He has requested I write at lunch instead of night and that we meant 6 times a day now instead of our normal 4 he says the two more hours could help a lot. To me it says "Ya I am worried you may fail so we NEED this to make sure you will not or at least not as badly." With all of this I do not know what to do. I am meeting with my mentor more and will get more sleep but as for writing during lunch I can not. I find it odd but even though this is weird to write in a journal I feel as if you are less a book and more just a really quite person who just wants nothing better to do then listen. It gives me a sort of peace to think of this journal this way makes it more special I guess. I do wish that you could write back to me though. It would indeed help me to figure out this predicament I am in. Yet I find nothing written back. I do so much miss Isabella's company, she knew what I felt and why. This is why at all cost I will save her. Now I must go though, I have more training then I am visiting Isabella.
July/17/2025
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Publication Date: 03-25-2011
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