Author's e-books - humor. Page - 12
A dry comedy about a man's mundane life and how his daily routine is suddenly stopped.
In Gulliver’s Travels Captain Gulliver relates how the people of Lilliput were very tiny, hardly reaching his ankles, and how they were evenly divided into two political parties – the High Heels who strongly argued a soft boiled egg must always be opened on the pointed end – and the Low Heels who argued just as firmly that it should only be opened on the round end – and he told in exciting detail of the intrigues and infighting that ensued from this major political difference.
Now, in this book, based on a newly discovered manuscript in Gulliver’s own hand, we’re treated to an equally exciting eyewitness account of the little people’s quaint economy.
Meet 17 year old Melody Alice Grant, a small town bad-ass. At age 5 she let all the animals out at the county fair. At age 8 she stole a horse. At age 13 she got arrested 16 times... I think you get the point. What happens if her dad and evil step-mum get tired of her craziness? What happens when they ship her off to her Uncle's home in London? Only to be greeted by five REALLY hot guys also known as One Direction? Then not only one, but 3 of them fall in love with her? Will Melody show these guys the time of their lives? Or will they flip her world upside down and inside out? You'll just have to read to find out what happens to little ole Melody ........ Because when your with Melody nothing goes exactly as planned.......
"He straightens his hat, then places his whiskey on the piano."
A comedic short poem/story inspired by fictional characters and first dates.
Three best friends are having an ordinary day, heading towards the mall. Until they make a big mistake, and are kidnapped by a bunch of guys.
World famous teenage rockstar Rocky Nelson has just been kidnapped by two girls who really don't know what they're doing, while his brothers hire an idiot detective to track him down. Escaping should be easy, except for the tiny fact that he may or may not have developed a whacko sort of Stockholm Syndrome on Maya, the "leader", and the fact that gang members keep popping up and trying to kidnap him from his kidnappers. Just why would a twenty-year-old young woman abduct a rockstar? What is really going on behind his kidnapping? And why is it that the bad guy in the story... might not be so bad after all?
A Search For Donald Cottee is a novel about individualism. It’s also a parody of Don Quixote, reinterpreting the Don’s quest in contemporary terms and also using several of the scenes from Cervantes’s tome.
Donkey and his wife, Poncho Suzie, have retired to Benidorm on Spain´s Costa Blanca. Don has left behind his incessant self-education and Suzie has turned the corner of her illness. Their new life is parked on the salubrious La Manga campsite and from there they pursue their ambition of eternal holiday. To savour the developing experience, and to make its potential paradise available to all, they blog.
But they can never escape their origins, even as their new future unfolds, perhaps disintegrates into the present. Episodes from the past reappear, reincarnate themselves. Don’s environmental campaigning and Suzie’s quest for business success fill the time.
And then they discover that their friends, some old, some new, some related, others not, are transacting the businesses of their own lives. There is money in vice, more in property, even more in merely trading people.
In a world where competition is the norm, where a dog’s only possible diet is another dog, Don and Suzie are determined to do good works, to be honest and loyal to all, to support what is right. But then, in the final analysis, when the jigsaw of lives is broken apart, we see that perhaps the pieces never did fit. And so, still trying to do good, Donkey Cottee and Poncho Suzie leave us with an enigma. Or is it a riddle?
There's trouble in paradise when a vicious hurricane sweeps over the 18th century Caribbean island of San Felipe and sweet, virtuous Chantilly St. John is the answer. However, before the good people could toss the young virgin into the volcano to appease the native gods and save them all, pirates descend and whisk her away. Now the only thing standing between the citizens of San Felipe and impending doom is the dashing but reclusive pirate Vaughn Seabrooke?
In this parody of the romance genre, follow the adventures of Chantilly and Vaughn as they face impossible odds while battling their throbbing, puckering, pouting urges.
Emily Hail did not believe in fairy tale, love, or happy endings. She believed she was fated to spend the rest of her life as a servant girl for a noble family. That is until she stumbles upon another world. However, this new land is under the tyranny of the Zonova family. Emily joins a group of Nobles who are plotting against the corrupt government. Moreover, Emily happens to be the cataclysm they are in need of.
The Cross-Eyed Cricket may not be in any travel guides but to the chosen few that know about this little dive, it's their home away from home. We look in on the place as they prepare for an "End of the World" party on December 21, 2012. In the same fashion as hurricane parties, the patrons are just looking for an escape from the mundane. Join them and see what they discover.
A dry comedy about a man's mundane life and how his daily routine is suddenly stopped.
In Gulliver’s Travels Captain Gulliver relates how the people of Lilliput were very tiny, hardly reaching his ankles, and how they were evenly divided into two political parties – the High Heels who strongly argued a soft boiled egg must always be opened on the pointed end – and the Low Heels who argued just as firmly that it should only be opened on the round end – and he told in exciting detail of the intrigues and infighting that ensued from this major political difference.
Now, in this book, based on a newly discovered manuscript in Gulliver’s own hand, we’re treated to an equally exciting eyewitness account of the little people’s quaint economy.
Meet 17 year old Melody Alice Grant, a small town bad-ass. At age 5 she let all the animals out at the county fair. At age 8 she stole a horse. At age 13 she got arrested 16 times... I think you get the point. What happens if her dad and evil step-mum get tired of her craziness? What happens when they ship her off to her Uncle's home in London? Only to be greeted by five REALLY hot guys also known as One Direction? Then not only one, but 3 of them fall in love with her? Will Melody show these guys the time of their lives? Or will they flip her world upside down and inside out? You'll just have to read to find out what happens to little ole Melody ........ Because when your with Melody nothing goes exactly as planned.......
"He straightens his hat, then places his whiskey on the piano."
A comedic short poem/story inspired by fictional characters and first dates.
Three best friends are having an ordinary day, heading towards the mall. Until they make a big mistake, and are kidnapped by a bunch of guys.
World famous teenage rockstar Rocky Nelson has just been kidnapped by two girls who really don't know what they're doing, while his brothers hire an idiot detective to track him down. Escaping should be easy, except for the tiny fact that he may or may not have developed a whacko sort of Stockholm Syndrome on Maya, the "leader", and the fact that gang members keep popping up and trying to kidnap him from his kidnappers. Just why would a twenty-year-old young woman abduct a rockstar? What is really going on behind his kidnapping? And why is it that the bad guy in the story... might not be so bad after all?
A Search For Donald Cottee is a novel about individualism. It’s also a parody of Don Quixote, reinterpreting the Don’s quest in contemporary terms and also using several of the scenes from Cervantes’s tome.
Donkey and his wife, Poncho Suzie, have retired to Benidorm on Spain´s Costa Blanca. Don has left behind his incessant self-education and Suzie has turned the corner of her illness. Their new life is parked on the salubrious La Manga campsite and from there they pursue their ambition of eternal holiday. To savour the developing experience, and to make its potential paradise available to all, they blog.
But they can never escape their origins, even as their new future unfolds, perhaps disintegrates into the present. Episodes from the past reappear, reincarnate themselves. Don’s environmental campaigning and Suzie’s quest for business success fill the time.
And then they discover that their friends, some old, some new, some related, others not, are transacting the businesses of their own lives. There is money in vice, more in property, even more in merely trading people.
In a world where competition is the norm, where a dog’s only possible diet is another dog, Don and Suzie are determined to do good works, to be honest and loyal to all, to support what is right. But then, in the final analysis, when the jigsaw of lives is broken apart, we see that perhaps the pieces never did fit. And so, still trying to do good, Donkey Cottee and Poncho Suzie leave us with an enigma. Or is it a riddle?
There's trouble in paradise when a vicious hurricane sweeps over the 18th century Caribbean island of San Felipe and sweet, virtuous Chantilly St. John is the answer. However, before the good people could toss the young virgin into the volcano to appease the native gods and save them all, pirates descend and whisk her away. Now the only thing standing between the citizens of San Felipe and impending doom is the dashing but reclusive pirate Vaughn Seabrooke?
In this parody of the romance genre, follow the adventures of Chantilly and Vaughn as they face impossible odds while battling their throbbing, puckering, pouting urges.
Emily Hail did not believe in fairy tale, love, or happy endings. She believed she was fated to spend the rest of her life as a servant girl for a noble family. That is until she stumbles upon another world. However, this new land is under the tyranny of the Zonova family. Emily joins a group of Nobles who are plotting against the corrupt government. Moreover, Emily happens to be the cataclysm they are in need of.
The Cross-Eyed Cricket may not be in any travel guides but to the chosen few that know about this little dive, it's their home away from home. We look in on the place as they prepare for an "End of the World" party on December 21, 2012. In the same fashion as hurricane parties, the patrons are just looking for an escape from the mundane. Join them and see what they discover.