The Complete Works of William Shakespeare by William Shakespeare (book suggestions TXT) 📖

the valiant Ajax to invite the most valorous Hector to come unarm’d to my tent; and to procure safe conduct for his person of the magnanimous and most illustrious six-or-seven-times-honour’d Captain General of the Grecian army, et cetera, Agamemnon. Do this.

PATROCLUS. Jove bless great Ajax!

THERSITES. Hum!

PATROCLUS. I come from the worthy Achilles-THERSITES. Ha!

PATROCLUS. Who most humbly desires you to invite Hector to his tent-THERSITES. Hum!

PATROCLUS. And to procure safe conduct from Agamemnon.

THERSITES. Agamemnon!

PATROCLUS. Ay, my lord.

THERSITES. Ha!

PATROCLUS. What you say to’t?

THERSITES. God buy you, with all my heart.

PATROCLUS. Your answer, sir.

THERSITES. If tomorrow be a fair day, by eleven of the clock it will go one way or other. Howsoever, he shall pay for me ere he has me.

PATROCLUS. Your answer, sir.

THERSITES. Fare ye well, with all my heart.

ACHILLES. Why, but he is not in this tune, is he?

THERSITES. No, but he’s out a tune thus. What music will be in him when Hector has knock’d out his brains I know not; but, I am sure, none; unless the fiddler Apollo get his sinews to make catlings on.

ACHILLES. Come, thou shalt bear a letter to him straight.

THERSITES. Let me carry another to his horse; for that’s the more capable creature.

ACHILLES. My mind is troubled, like a fountain stirr’d; And I myself see not the bottom of it.

Exeunt ACHILLES and PATROCLUS

THERSITES. Would the fountain of your mind were clear again, that I might water an ass at it. I had rather be a tick in a sheep than such a valiant ignorance. Exit

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ACT IV. SCENE 1.

Troy. A street

 

Enter, at one side, AENEAS, and servant with a torch; at another, PARIS, DEIPHOBUS, ANTENOR, DIOMEDES the Grecian, and others, with torches PARIS. See, ho! Who is that there?

DEIPHOBUS. It is the Lord Aeneas.

AENEAS. Is the Prince there in person?

Had I so good occasion to lie long

As you, Prince Paris, nothing but heavenly business Should rob my bed-mate of my company.

DIOMEDES. That’s my mind too. Good morrow, Lord Aeneas.

PARIS. A valiant Greek, Aeneas -take his hand: Witness the process of your speech, wherein You told how Diomed, a whole week by days, Did haunt you in the field.

AENEAS. Health to you, valiant sir,

During all question of the gentle truce; But when I meet you arm’d, as black defiance As heart can think or courage execute.

DIOMEDES. The one and other Diomed embraces.

Our bloods are now in calm; and so long health!

But when contention and occasion meet, By Jove, I’ll play the hunter for thy life With all my force, pursuit, and policy.

AENEAS. And thou shalt hunt a lion, that will fly With his face backward. In humane gentleness, Welcome to Troy! now, by Anchises’ life, Welcome indeed! By Venus’ hand I swear No man alive can love in such a sort

The thing he means to kill, more excellently.

DIOMEDES. We sympathise. Jove let Aeneas live, If to my sword his fate be not the glory, A thousand complete courses of the sun!

But in mine emulous honour let him die With every joint a wound, and that tomorrow!

AENEAS. We know each other well.

DIOMEDES.We do; and long to know each other worse.

PARIS. This is the most despiteful’st gentle greeting The noblest hateful love, that e’er I heard of.

What business, lord, so early?

AENEAS. I was sent for to the King; but why, I know not.

PARIS. His purpose meets you: ‘twas to bring this Greek To Calchas’ house, and there to render him, For the enfreed Antenor, the fair Cressid.

Let’s have your company; or, if you please, Haste there before us. I constantly believe-Or rather call my thought a certain knowledge-My brother Troilus lodges there tonight.

Rouse him and give him note of our approach, With the whole quality wherefore; I fear We shall be much unwelcome.

AENEAS. That I assure you:

Troilus had rather Troy were borne to Greece Than Cressid borne from Troy.

PARIS. There is no help;

The bitter disposition of the time

Will have it so. On, lord; we’ll follow you.

AENEAS. Good morrow, all. Exit with servant PARIS. And tell me, noble Diomed-faith, tell me true, Even in the soul of sound good-fellowship-Who in your thoughts deserves fair Helen best, Myself or Menelaus?

DIOMEDES. Both alike:

He merits well to have her that doth seek her, Not making any scruple of her soilure, With such a hell of pain and world of charge; And you as well to keep her that defend her, Not palating the taste of her dishonour, With such a costly loss of wealth and friends.

He like a puling cuckold would drink up The lees and dregs of a flat tamed piece; You, like a lecher, out of whorish loins Are pleas’d to breed out your inheritors.

Both merits pois’d, each weighs nor less nor more; But he as he, the heavier for a whore.

PARIS. You are too bitter to your country-woman.

DIOMEDES. She’s bitter to her country. Hear me, Paris: For every false drop in her bawdy veins A Grecian’s life hath sunk; for every scruple Of her contaminated carrion weight

A Troyan hath been slain; since she could speak, She hath not given so many good words breath As for her Greeks and Troyans suff’red death.

PARIS. Fair Diomed, you do as chapmen do, Dispraise the thing that you desire to buy; But we in silence hold this virtue well: We’ll not commend what we intend to sell.

Here lies our way. Exeunt

ACT IV. SCENE 2.

Troy. The court of PANDARUS’ house

 

Enter TROILUS and CRESSIDA

 

TROILUS. Dear, trouble not yourself; the morn is cold.

CRESSIDA. Then, sweet my lord, I’ll call mine uncle down; He shall unbolt the gates.

TROILUS. Trouble him not;

To bed, to bed! Sleep kill those pretty eyes, And give as soft attachment to thy senses As infants’ empty of all thought!

CRESSIDA. Good morrow, then.

TROILUS. I prithee now, to bed.

CRESSIDA. Are you aweary of me?

TROILUS. O Cressida! but that the busy day, Wak’d by the lark, hath rous’d the ribald crows, And dreaming night will hide our joys no longer, I would not from thee.

CRESSIDA. Night hath been too brief.

TROILUS. Beshrew the witch! with venomous wights she stays As tediously as hell, but flies the grasps of love With wings more momentary-swift than thought.

You will catch cold, and curse me.

CRESSIDA. Prithee tarry.

You men will never tarry.

O foolish Cressid! I might have still held off, And then you would have tarried. Hark! there’s one up.

PANDARUS. [Within] What’s all the doors open here?

TROILUS. It is your uncle.

 

Enter PANDARUS

 

CRESSIDA. A pestilence on him! Now will he be mocking.

I shall have such a life!

PANDARUS. How now, how now! How go maidenheads?

Here, you maid! Where’s my cousin Cressid?

CRESSIDA. Go hang yourself, you naughty mocking uncle.

You bring me to do, and then you flout me too.

PANDARUS. To do what? to do what? Let her say what.

What have I brought you to do?

CRESSIDA. Come, come, beshrew your heart! You’ll ne’er be good, Nor suffer others.

PANDARUS. Ha, ha! Alas, poor wretch! a poor capocchia! hast not slept tonight? Would he not, a naughty man, let it sleep? A bugbear take him!

CRESSIDA. Did not I tell you? Would he were knock’d i’ th’ head!

[One knocks]

Who’s that at door? Good uncle, go and see.

My lord, come you again into my chamber.

You smile and mock me, as if I meant naughtily.

TROILUS. Ha! ha!

CRESSIDA. Come, you are deceiv’d, I think of no such thing.

[Knock]

How earnestly they knock! Pray you come in: I would not for half Troy have you seen here.

Exeunt TROILUS and CRESSIDA PANDARUS. Who’s there? What’s the matter? Will you beat down the door? How now? What’s the matter?

 

Enter AENEAS

AENEAS. Good morrow, lord, good morrow.

PANDARUS. Who’s there? My lord Aeneas? By my troth, I knew you not. What news with you so early?

AENEAS. Is not Prince Troilus here?

PANDARUS. Here! What should he do here?

AENEAS. Come, he is here, my lord; do not deny him.

It doth import him much to speak with me.

PANDARUS. Is he here, say you? It’s more than I know, I’ll be sworn. For my own part, I came in late. What should he do here?

AENEAS. Who!-nay, then. Come, come, you’ll do him wrong ere you are ware; you’ll be so true to him to be false to him. Do not you know of him, but yet go fetch him hither; go.

 

Re-enter TROILUS

 

TROILUS. How now! What’s the matter?

AENEAS. My lord, I scarce have leisure to salute you, My matter is so rash. There is at hand Paris your brother, and Deiphobus,

The Grecian Diomed, and our Antenor

Deliver’d to us; and for him forthwith, Ere the first sacrifice, within this hour, We must give up to Diomedes’ hand

The Lady Cressida.

TROILUS. Is it so concluded?

AENEAS. By Priam, and the general state of Troy.

They are at hand and ready to effect it.

TROILUS. How my achievements mock me!

I will go meet them; and, my lord Aeneas, We met by chance; you did not find me here.

AENEAS. Good, good, my lord, the secrets of neighbour Pandar Have not more gift in taciturnity.

Exeunt TROILUS and AENEAS

PANDARUS. Is’t possible? No sooner got but lost? The devil take Antenor! The young prince will go mad. A plague upon Antenor! I would they had broke’s neck.

 

Re-enter CRESSIDA

 

CRESSIDA. How now! What’s the matter? Who was here?

PANDARUS. Ah, ah!

CRESSIDA. Why sigh you so profoundly? Where’s my lord? Gone? Tell me, sweet uncle, what’s the matter?

PANDARUS. Would I were as deep under the earth as I am above!

CRESSIDA. O the gods! What’s the matter?

PANDARUS. Pray thee, get thee in. Would thou hadst ne’er been born!

I knew thou wouldst be his death! O, poor gentleman! A plague upon Antenor!

CRESSIDA. Good uncle, I beseech you, on my knees I beseech you, what’s the matter?

PANDARUS. Thou must be gone, wench, thou must be gone; thou art chang’d for Antenor; thou must to thy father, and be gone from Troilus. ‘Twill be his death; ‘twill be his bane; he cannot bear it.

CRESSIDA. O you immortal gods! I will not go.

PANDARUS. Thou must.

CRESSIDA. I will not, uncle. I have forgot my father; I know no touch of consanguinity,

No kin, no love, no blood, no soul so near me As the sweet Troilus. O you gods divine, Make Cressid’s name the very crown of falsehood, If ever she leave Troilus! Time, force, and death, Do to this body what extremes you can, But the strong base and building of my love Is as the very centre of the earth,

Drawing all things to it. I’ll go in and weep-PANDARUS. Do, do.

CRESSIDA. Tear my bright hair, and scratch my praised cheeks, Crack my clear voice with sobs and break my heart, With sounding ‘Troilus.’ I will not go from Troy.

Exeunt

 

ACT IV. SCENE 3.

Troy. A street before PANDARUS’ house

 

Enter PARIS, TROILUS, AENEAS, DEIPHOBUS, ANTENOR, and DIOMEDES

 

PARIS. It is great morning; and the hour prefix’d For her delivery to this