A Sinless Betrayal by Cherie Benjamin (books to read for 12 year olds .TXT) 📖

I turn around, I see Abigor sitting on his strong black stallion, a cold look on his face. I'm afraid to move, but my horse slowly canters forwards. I can tell that he's angry with me. I wipe away my tears and try to compose myself.

He digs his heels into his horse's belly and gallops full speed ahead until he reaches me. "What 'de fuck do you t'ink you're doing?" he booms, his eyes filled to the brim with blood red wrath. "You try to escape!"

I'm angry with him. I hear the screaming in the background. "No, I wasn't trying to escape," I cry back at him angrily. "I was taking my horse out for a ride. It didn't look like you cared, did you?"

His face turns bright red. "How dare you! Ya kamata in ya buga muku mummunan hali!" Now he's screaming in his barbaric language, ranting as his horse circles mine.

Now I begin to cry against my will. I'm so angry that I can't help myself. "I should have run away! You're a horrible human being. You're no king! You're a slaughterer, a beast!" I dig my heels into the horse's belly and run ahead. He speeds after me.

"And you're no mistress either, you won't even fuck me!" he spits. "That's what whores 'supposed to do, huh? 'Dey fuck 'de man, not piss 'de man off! Dakiki kariya ya kamata kazaunaa indakuka kasance. Shinabin da kukeaka ce! Kana iya an ji masa rauni."

I make Daybreak run faster ahead. Finally, Abigor gives up and lets me speed ahead. Tears blind my eyes as Daybreak gallops faster. I'm so angry I feel uncontrollable. I want Michelle. I want to sob in her arms, and I want her to tell me that everything will be alright.

But will it be?

0o0o0o0o

I find Abigor to be so angry when we come back in from our little quarrel out in the meadows. I hide away in the harem during lunch and a little bit after 3 o' clock. I sit in the bathtub behind a curtain, the dark room lit by luminous and fragrant candles.

I sigh and lean my head against the lip of the wooden bathtub. Michelle comes up behind me, dressed in brilliant green silk and emerald jewels. She has been taken as Drinks of Waterfall's mistress. "Have you not pleased your master? Just this evening I saw him taking Camellia into his chambers."

I feel angry and almost betrayed that Abigor made love to another woman, but I remember that he's a barbarian and that's what they do. I shrug my shoulders and wash the red blood off of my skin. I do not mind Michelle in here. She has helped give me baths countless times before, but now I feel like it really isn't right.

We are equals now, in this utterly foreign land.

She kneels near the tub and dips her finger into the hot water. "You did not answer me, my lady."

I grimace and shake my head, my wet hand gripping hers. "I'm no longer 'my lady' to you, Michelle. Call me Elizabella."

Michelle opens her big brown eyes in shock. "I—I am not your equal. I am your handmaiden—"

"Not here," I cut her off quickly. "And never will you be my handmaiden again. You are a friend…my closest friend." She smiles tenderly at me, blushing a bright red colour. I sink deeper into the bathwater and sigh.

She looks behind the curtain for anyone listening or watching. "He told me his commoner's name," Michelle whispers to me. I'm interested. I lean forward in the tub, wanting to hear the name. "It's Tristan. But God save us all, Elizabella, if he finds out about me telling you that."

I press my lips into a straight, tight line and nod. "Your secret is safe with me," I chuckle. "He told me his name was Abigor. I'm not supposed to tell you that either, but I don't care."

Michelle furrows her brow. "He is not pleased with you? Or are you not pleased with him?"

I shrug. "It can go both ways, really," I explain, the hot water licking at my shoulders. "I ran off with the new horse he gave me to have a ride and get some fresh air for a half hour, and he got awfully upset with me. But I saw the village he led his men on and I became…sick, almost. It was appalling, Michelle. The slaughter, the blood, the fire, and the death."

Her eyes widened as she pulled up a stool and listened for more. "That's horrible!" she exclaims. Her eyes are full of fear and upset. I don't blame myself for putting it there. I blame Abigor and his barbarian pack of brutes.

I lick my lips, mirth sparkling in my eyes. "I told him he was no king, and that he was a slaughterer. He didn't enjoy hearing that, I'll tell you that. I was afraid he'd strike me, but I rode ahead and he hasn't bothered me since."

I stand from the bath and Michelle hands me a towel to dry myself with. She helps my silky golden robes onto me before leading me out of the bathing area. The women gather around Camellia, one of the younger girls in the harem. She is bruised and weakened.

Suddenly, I remember what Michelle told me. Camellia had gone into Abigor's room to satisfy his sexual needs. I'm horrified. I storm out of the room.

0o0o0o0o

He is so angry that he does not speak to me that night. I lay in bed long after he had gone to sleep. My fingers run over the blunt edge of the curved blade. I'm drowsy and tired, and I can even tell myself that I'm not in the right mindset.

I slowly sit up, making sure that I do not rouse him from his sleep. I press the silver blade to his neck. My heart's pounding in my chest. He does not wake. I climb into his lap, pressing the blade harder to his neck.

"Do it." The voice startles me. It's soft, but I do not expect it. He does not open his eyes, and he does not move. His lips merely move again. "Do it. Slit my throat. Do it." I stall, my heart clambering ridiculously against my ribs. I can't move. He cracks his eyes open a little bit and slides his hands up my arms. "I said do it."

I stare down him under heavy-lidded eyes. "You are not afraid?" I ask softly. The candles are the only light in the large room.

He chuckles and gets comfortable under the blade. "Everyone dies, zaki da budurwar. Whether it be now or sixty years from now, whether it be by your blade or old age. It all happens."

My lip trembles. "If I don't kill you, you'll just kill more innocent people."

He blinks. "Yes." I'm startled by his answer. I am the one with the blade, and his life is (possibly) in danger. I press the tip into his jugular vein, careful not to split any skin. "I won't lie to you, Tiger Claw. I steal, I kill, I beat, and I fuck…but I do not lie."

I imagine the kingdom without Abigor. Then his brother, Will, would take the throne, and me as his mistress. I cringe. I pull the blade away and slump into his body. The blade clatters to the floor.

Warm, large arms wrap around my waist and pull me closer. Hot lips are near my ear. Tears sting in my eyes and fall slowly down my cheeks. "I do not deserve your kindness," I sniffle quietly.

"No," he agrees. "You don't. But you still gon' get it."

I pull back to look at him, my eyes watery. "I just attempted to kill you."

His hand comes up to stroke my cheek, pushing the hair out of my eyes, and his lips pulled up into a smug grin. "S'nothin'. You not the first one to try and kill me, Tiger Claw. But I'm glad that 'dis time it was you."

He lays me back down next to him. I'm at ease, but I know I'm not completely off the hook. My cold fingers find his warm hand and I begin to trace the patterns of his palm. He grasps my hand and squeezes tightly.

"Sleep, soyayya," he says.

I close my eyes.

I sleep, never letting go of his hand. Deal

When I wake up, he's dressed and sitting in his big bearskin chair by the unlit fireplace. It's sort of cold that morning. He's a complete blanket-hog and leaves me with barely anything to cover up with. Maybe it's because his body's so big, I contemplate.

He's got an old sack lying by his feet. Abigor's long black hair falls, unbraided, around his shoulders. It's silky and black, just like the midnight sky. He knows I'm awake. He pulls a blue sapphire necklace out of the sack and holds it up. "You like 'dis?" he asks.

Abigor casts a sideways glance at me. I nod quickly and clear my throat. "It's beautiful," I murmur, gripping the sheets beneath the soft linen sheets beneath me. He tosses it over to me, and then focuses his attention back to the bag.

I examine the jewels. They sparkle in the sweet morning light filtering through the windows in Abigor's room. They're absolutely gorgeous. I wonder if he bought them for me.

I slide out of bed, only clad in my nightgown, and approach him slowly. He notices my presence but does not stop his rummaging. "Good morning, then," he grounds out in his deep, husky voice.

Nodding, I go to sit by his chair. I jerk my head towards the bag sitting beside his feet. "Where'd you get those?" I ask him curiously. "Did you buy them all?"

He merely chuckles and shakes his head. "I am the king. I do not buy," he snaps as if I'm supposed to know that.

I frown and look into the bag. There are jewels and gold and other valuable items. I lick my dry lips. "Then where did you get them all?" I ask, slightly annoyed that he still hasn't answered me.

"Raid," he replies. "Everything here is a result of raiding, stealing, and pillaging."

I gape, looking around the room. There are paintings, tall wardrobes, and jewels littered around the room. "Everything?" I ask, my voice barely a whisper. I can't believe that everything here had been stolen from villagers.

He'd apparently done a lot of stealing, that was for sure.

Abigor gets up from his seat. "Yes." He carries the bag over to a desk and displays it to her eyes. "Everything." The jewels are dumped out onto the wooden countertop and feebly toyed with.

I stand by him. I can't believe how beautiful his hair is. I reach out, my mind unable to think and/or process what I'm exactly doing, and stroke the soft black strands. He jumps slightly and turns his head. "Don't touch," he growls at me.

I reel back in surprise, snatching my hand away. I blink uncomfortably. "I'm…I'm sorry. I just wanted to braid it."

He turns around, his nostrils flaring and his eyes trying to search for hidden words in the wood. The muscles in his jaw tense as his fingers grip the sides of his chair. "You want to braid 'de hair?" he asks softly.

I nod, even though he can't see me. "Yes.