Diary Contest: by Robin Joy Wirth (each kindness read aloud .txt) 📖

Feb 25, 2011

My nose was so stuffy today I just had to go to the doctor. I took a different bus back than I'd used to get there even though it would mean several changes instead of one.

Everyone on the bus was still up in arms about the fact no one had approved bus funding and within the year our services would be drastically reduced. I had plenty to say on the topic, since one of the other riders mentioned that people with money didn't care
what happened to people who had less.

As if to prove his point we heard tires screeching as the bus started to pull out. The driver had to slam on his brakes to evade some truck that apparently didn't want to be behind him. The careless driver floored it to speed past, and I launched into a tirade about him as well.

Feb 26, 2011
There is so much work to get done in this apartment, and today I seem to ache all over. I do most days, but this is different. My neck is getting stiffer and more painful by the minute. Been wracking my brain trying to remember if I tweaked my neck somehow.

I got all the laundry into the basket and cleaned up the kids' room so it is ready for visit. You cannot know how sick to death I am of CPS keeping my kids. If I found a way to sue them for pain and suffering I'd do it in a heartbeat.

Feb 27, 2011
We had to take the bus to Jeffery's mom's house because his sister didn't go over yesterday. Rachel would rather go out all weekend and foist her two girls off on her mother than spend time with her, apparently.

My son wasn't here last night so we never got to play any pinochle at all, but supposedly Rachel will be here by noon today--we'll see.

She was here at three but wanted us to all pack up for the ride home and put me at her place to watch the girls. Hope is twirling in the bedroom and Nancy and I both have out our guitars. I showed her how to try to strum in time instead of radically, and the notes I gave her were G, A, and B so she could try to learn Silent Night by next Christmas, since that's the goal we originally set.

She is doing fairly well, so next I'll be showing her what dotted notes and 8th notes are so she can actually play the phrase as written.

Feb 28, 2011
I just realized why my neck hurts! When the bus driver slammed his breaks I remember flying forward and flinging my left hand out to stop myself, and the pain I am having is in my neck and especially localizing in my left shoulder. Coincidence? I don't think so.

So I ran a search for chiropractors and called a few, but didn't get anywhere. I don't have time to deal with it tomorrow or the next day, I will have my children. Not to mention I have other things to do as well. Maybe it will go away if I just ignore it.

Mar 1, 2011
Today has been madness incarnate. For some reason the gas main exploded at the bus station so the whole transit system is in chaos. And I had to take buses to my payee's office, the bank, CPS office in search of a bus card that wasn't even there, and then over to pay for rental on the tv but not the laptop because Jeffery convinced some woman online to buy him one of his own. We gave it back in exchange for a bed that will arrive on Wednesday afternoon.

But the bedroom looks like the laundry vomited itself out of the basket, and I hurt so much I'd just as soon leave it there but know I won't.

Mar 2, 2011
Visit went fairly well today even though my daughter's nose was leaking all over the place. She also has a bit of a fever so I doubt there will be a visit tomorrow. Also I just learned that from now on only visits cancelled by the driver can be made up, not any we cancel for being ill. That's a crock if I ever heard one. "I'm too sick and don't want to give it to my babies, we'll need to cancel" and I get penalized for doing the right thing? Unbelievable.

Mar 3, 2011
No visit. I attacked the bedroom full force today, took everything that wasn't nailed down out of there and vacuumed, including moving the dresser into a different place. I did this all by myself because I was the only one willing to. But I realized about half way through the endeavor I was going to pay dearly for it--I ran out of painkillers last night and all that's left is aspirin for my heart, so in order to kill this ache I'd need to take half the bottle and I'm not willing to do so. But at least the new bed is here to console me instead of saying "well, it's your own fault" like everyone else wants to do.

I am not looking for sympathy, just acknowledgement. Some validation that the injury exists and hurts and I deserve to be commended for my efforts in spite of it all. Didn't get any, though. As usual.

Mar 4, 2011
I called a chiropractor today and made an appointment to get looked at on Saturday, which is tomorrow. They said I need to tell the bus company what happened and get a case i.d. so they can treat me, but the bus company refused to give me one. The woman stated that they did not want to claim ownership for an incident that may have never happened in the first place, and since I had no witnesses it was likely my bid for help would be denied. How do you like that? That is totally rude!

Mar 5, 2011
The chiropractor did some weird test to show where my muscles tensed and where they were weak, and it is totally bad. So I took it with me to visit my kid and Jeffery's mom, and neither Brock nor Abbie was suitably impressed. Brock actually told me that there was no way to prove that the injuries just happened, and even if they did I couldn't prove how the injury occurred.

"You were just moving furniture, it could have
happened then."

"But it hurt before that, I just moved the furniture anyway."

"Can't prove it."

Damn, he's right. I'm going to have to just try
another avenue to get rid of the pain, I guess. If I can find the time to do it.

Mar 6, 2011
Rachel got all the clubs and declared a shutout today. While I was interested because I'd never seen one, I was also in so much pain that I was finding it difficult to play at all. But it wasn't just because of my neck, though.

Every time I ate food today I vomited it back up, and my throat didn't just feel tight when I was trying to swallow, it did it on the way out as well. At least I have that swallow study scheduled, although I am not looking forward to eating a bunch of food with barium in it. Whoopee!

Mar 7, 2011
Another monday already? Who cares? I've been feeling decidedly depressed and unloved because nobody cares that I hurt my neck and nobody cares that my food won't stay in and I don't want to go to some stupid case review wherein they're just going to say I'm not good enough anyway. Screw everybody, I need some recognition here. I need some validation, and some consideration, and some help to finish this never-ending supply of house work.

And my cane is missing. How am I supposed to go anywhere without my cane? If I had some painkiller I might try it, but like this? You're f-in' crazy!!!

Mar 8, 2011
Our CPS worker brought over the baby today, and my dishes were not done and Jeffery said he was going to vacuum but then left instead, and for some stupid reason Logan's bottle chose today of all days to get clogged up, and also the knitted slippers I am trying to sell to the guy who ordered them were in a bag on top the desk, and when I removed the bag we discovered a bottle of pills that I had went and got yesterday had not made it into the cupboard but were sitting where Heather could find them, and also there was a bottle of air freshener left on the stand near the door to block out the marijuana smell from next door. I found out it was her last day working at this office and we were about to get a new worker, so I
wished her well and gave her a picture of our kids to bring with her.

Mar 9, 2011
Since our former case worker said the home was cluttered I went on the rampage and cleaned everything in sight, then started putting things we
don't use away and all that. Jeffery had to leave visit slightly early to go do a study that pays in product, and then wait around for some guy who
said he would buy it. So when I was done with my rampage I then decided the bags in the kitchen looked messy and designed a bag-bee for them, which I then started to crochet at light speed for the rest of the evening.

Mar 10, 2011
I called my doctor today trying to make an appointment but had to go to Urgent Care since they were full. They x-rayed my neck and sent me to the
pharmacy to get flexeril and ibuprofen, and while I was there I asked about my other meds. They tried to order them but said it was too soon, so I would have to come back for them another day. My neck was totally straight, though.

I went and ate some lunch and went into the goodwill on my neverending search to find a stepping stool for Heather so she could reach the sink. Nothing there but I found several items of lingerie I thought my honey would enjoy if only I could get them. Sigh!!!

Mar 11, 2011
Brock and the boys came over last night for our weekly game of Shadowrun, but I felt so unwell I went to bed before it was concluded. My belly is aching something fierce, and I really don't feel like going to Abbie's today, especially if they are going to complain that they can't tell when I'm joking again.

So now I'm supposed to laugh at the end of a joke so they know it is one? What's the point in that if you're doing a dead pan the point is you don't laugh--duh. Do I have to educate these people in the art of pretending to be serious? I don't think so.

Mar 12, 2011
We brought over laundry yesterday and doing it made my stomach feel even worse, and I think I have caught Heather's cold. When I coughed really hard I wet myself and had to change, and then I vomited and got