A SECRET LOVE by bella cullen830 (top 5 books to read TXT) 📖

Preface

They said that there was an ancient vampire prophecy. It went something like this: There will come one vampire who will be loved by two of her kind. She will be so powerful that none can destroy her. Vampires will fear her; humans will name her their new found savior. All through her human life she will know of the existence of vampires and will never fear them. As a human, her blood's scent will be so enticing that most would crave it. She will be the salvation for both kinds.

They say I am her. I wouldn't know nor do I care. All I care about is my lost love. I don't think they expected me to reveal our kind to the humans, but they don't control me nor could they stop me. I am too powerful for them; they fear me. I will find him, I must. I do not care if humans worship me nor do I care for the taste of them. I just need to find him; I need to find my Jasper.


Chapter One


I was worried about Jasper, but I knew not to voice my concern. Edward was driving me home and was probably more furious with himself than with Jasper. He was looking coldly out the windshield. He, of course, was silent and it was driving me insane.

“Please, just say something,” I begged him.

“What do you want me to say, Bella?” he asked not looking at me.

“That you forgive me,” I said, though it wasn't really his forgiveness I was looking for. “If I had been more careful, nothing would have happened.”

“Would you listen to yourself?” he said through clenched teeth. “You shouldn't have to be more careful. This isn't your fault. If you were at Mike Newton's with the rest of your normal friends the worst that would have happened is they not being able to find a bandage for the paper cut.”

“How did Mike Newton come in to this conversation?' I asked.

“He's a healthier choice for you, Bella.”

“Mike and I together, I'd rather die, Edward.”

“And you could have tonight.”

By now we were in front of my house. All I could think about was getting Edward out of here so Jasper could come to me. I studied Edward for a moment before realizing just how dark his eyes had gotten because of what happened. I sighed and reached over to turn his head toward me.

“Your eyes are nearly pitch black, you should go hunt.”

“I'm fine.”

“But you're not, Edward. You're worried about me and you're thirsty. Go, hunt. I'll be fine.”

I started to gather my gifts, placing them gently under my arms. Edward was already at my door when I had a good hold on them.

“Are you sure?” he asked. I nodded. “At least let me take these up to your room for you.”

“Okay,” I said as he took the gifts from me. Then, not looking into his eyes I said, “Love you.”

“As I love you.” With that he was gone.

I hurried up to the house, wanting to get to my room as soon as possible.

“Bells?” Charlie called as I entered the house.

“Yeah, Dad. It's me.” I called back to him as I hung my coat up.

“Have fun?” he asked as a walked through the living room.

“Yeah,” I replied, walking to the stairs. “Alice went overboard. Cake, flowers even gifts.”

“Gifts? Like what?” he asked.

“A new stereo for my truck and a few ones I didn't get to open,” I said. “I tripped and fell on my way to the other gifts, the side of the table cutting me on my way down. No big deal. Carlisle fixed me up right there on the spot. But we ran out of time because of it so I figured I'd just leave the unopened gifts in the truck and open them in front of the Cullens tomorrow.”

“Bella,” he sighed, shaking his head.

“Well, I'm going to bed, night.”

“Night, Bells.”

I rushed up the stairs and quickly changed, hoping Jasper would get here soon. My hopes were soon answered as Jasper came through the window. He wouldn't look at me at first and I was worried he was angry at me, but then I felt self-hatred coming off him.

I walked up behind him, knowing that he could hear my every move, and gently placed one of my hands on his shoulder. At first he stiffened, but slowly relaxed into my touch. Slowly he turned towards me, guilt all over his face. He wrapped his arms around my waist and brought me closer to him.

“I so sorry, Bella,” he whispered.

“Shh,” I shushed him. “Listen to me, Jasper. This is not your fault. I should have been more careful.”

“More careful?” he said. “Bella you shouldn't have to be careful.”

“You sound just like Edward,” I sighed. “He thinks I should be with Mike Newton, but I'd rather die. I'd rather die than be with anyone but you.”

“You have the shield up, don't you?” he asked.

“I always have it up around the room,” I replied with a sigh. “You know that.”

“Just checking,” he said, then bent down and kissed me.

It was a short kiss, but it was sweet and full of love.

“I love you,” he said as he pulled away.

“And I love you,” I said. “How upset is Edward?”

“Upset enough to leave,” he said. “According to Alice, he's going to try to convince us it's time to go and to leave you behind.”

“But you can't leave,” I said, turning away from him. “I can't lose you.”

“Bella, you know I have to go,” he said. “They'd get suspicious if I don't.”

“But you'll come back?”

“No. I can't risk hurting you, Bella. It's better this way.”
“Better this way?!? How can it be better this way when just the thought of us being a part makes me feel like I can't breathe.”

Suddenly his arms were around me. “Bella,” he whispered into my ear. “I have to do this. No matter how much it hurts us, we must part. My control needs so much work and I couldn't live with myself if I hurt you.”

“I need you.”

“Your safety comes first, Bella.”

“When are you leaving?” I asked as tears ran down my face.

“Alice, Rose, Emmett, Esme, and I are leaving tonight. Carlisle and Edward are leaving at the end of the week. Edward is planning on being the only one to say good bye but I couldn't leave without telling you first. You'll have to act as if it's the first you've heard of it.”

“I'll just pretend he's you.”

“I had this made for you,” he said as he fastened a necklace around my neck. “There's only two diamonds.”

I looked at the pendant and saw a simple golden cursive J that started and ended with a small diamond.

“It's beautiful,” I said as he wrapped his jacket around me.

“If you ever have a rough day, I hope that all you have to do is look at it and know just how much I love you; how much I miss you.”

“You should go, Alice will begin to wonder.”

I tried to give him back his jacket but he simply said, “Keep it so you don't forget my scent.” He then kissed my forehead and was gone. I took in one last sniff of his jacket and then hid it under a loose floor board in my closet and placed a box full off my Arizona clothes over it. Then I tucked my necklace under my pajamas and went to bed for my most restless night so far in my life.

The days went by fast; the nights becoming worse with each passing day without Jasper. Edward stayed every night until I fell asleep, only to return again before I'd wake in the morning. I only knew he left because I would often wake up from nightmares in the middle of the night.

Before I knew it, Friday was here. Edward had been stand – offish all week; his eyes solid like stone instead of their usual liquid topaz. I knew he was just acting; that he thought it would be easier for me if he acted as though he didn't care. I knew he did. I knew it killed him to act that way towards me.

When he broke up with me after school Friday, I forced myself to be heartbroken, but really I was relieved. I could now show how I felt on the inside, what I had been hiding all week. He asked me to promise him that I wouldn't do anything reckless, “for Charlie's sake,” and he in return promised that it would be like he, and his family, had never existed.

He can't keep that promise, though. Even if he took away all of the things that would remind me of them, he wouldn't know to take away my necklace or Jasper's coat. He couldn't take away memories or the house.

He left me alone in the forest and from there I acted solely on instinct. I ran after him. I knew I would never catch him; I knew that it was hopeless, that he wanted me safe, but all I could think about was that he knew where Jasper was. So I ran, tripping several times.

It was dark by the time I gave up. I didn't know where I was and I had just tripped over a log. I just stayed down. I felt like I didn't have the strength to get up. I was tired and I just wanted all the emotions to end. I could feel were the branches of trees and thorns of bushes had give my minor cuts; the bruises from the repeated trips.

Minutes soon turned into hours and before I knew it the moon was over head. I could hear voices calling for someone but I didn't let them register. I just wanted to stay where I was and be left alone.

I was suddenly lifted from the ground by extremely warm arms.

“I got her,” a man called, his voice strangely familiar. Then he started to jog off in whichever direction. Like I said, I really didn't want to leave that spot. The way I saw things my life was over now that he was gone.

He's gone. He was really gone and now there was a hole in my chest where my heart should have been.

In what felt like hours, but in reality could have been just minutes, the person who was carrying me emerged from the forest.

“Bella,” I heard yet another familiar voice called out from a distance.

“She's fine, Charlie,” the man who was carrying me called back to him. Wait, Charlie. Charlie? Dad, Dad... I had to come out of this state for him if anyone. I owed him that. “She just keeps saying 'He's gone,' every once in a while.” Had I been saying that out loud?

“Dad,” I managed, with some effort, to say.

“I'm right here, Bells,” he said to me. “I got her from here, Sam. Thank – you, so much.”

There was an awkward exchange as Charlie took me from Sam's arms.

“He's gone,” I whispered again before I blanked out.

Minutes turned into hours. Hours turned into