Mike by Pelham Grenville Wodehouse (dar e dil novel online reading .TXT) đ
- Author: Pelham Grenville Wodehouse
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summer night through the open window. He gibbered slightly when Mike
reappeared.
âJackson! What do you mean by running about outside the house in this
way! I shall punish you very heavily. I shall certainly report the
matter to the headmaster. I will not have boys rushing about the
garden in their pyjamas. You will catch an exceedingly bad cold. You
will do me two hundred lines, Latin and English. Exceedingly so. I
will not have it. Did you not hear me call to you?â
âPlease, sir, so excited,â said Mike, standing outside with his hands
on the sill.
âYou have no business to be excited. I will not have it. It is
exceedingly impertinent of you.â
âPlease, sir, may I come in?â
âCome in! Of course, come in. Have you no sense, boy? You are laying
the seeds of a bad cold. Come in at once.â
Mike clambered through the window.
âI couldnât find him, sir. He must have got out of the garden.â
âUndoubtedly,â said Mr. Wain. âUndoubtedly so. It was very wrong of
you to search for him. You have been seriously injured. Exceedingly
soâ
He was about to say more on the subject when Wyatt strolled into the
room. Wyatt wore the rather dazed expression of one who has been
aroused from deep sleep. He yawned before he spoke.
âI thought I heard a noise, sir,â he said.
He called Mr. Wain âfatherâ in private, âsirâ in public. The presence
of Mike made this a public occasion.
âHas there been a burglary?â
âYes,â said Mike, âonly he has got away.â
âShall I go out into the garden, and have a look round, sir?â asked
Wyatt helpfully.
The question stung Mr. Wain into active eruption once more.
âUnder no circumstances whatever,â he said excitedly. âStay where you
are, James. I will not have boys running about my garden at night. It
is preposterous. Inordinately so. Both of you go to bed immediately. I
shall not speak to you again on this subject. I must be obeyed
instantly. You hear me, Jackson? James, you understand me? To bed at
once. And, if I find you outside your dormitory again to-night, you
will both be punished with extreme severity. I will not have this lax
and reckless behaviour.â
âBut the burglar, sir?â said Wyatt.
âWe might catch him, sir,â said Mike.
Mr. Wainâs manner changed to a slow and stately sarcasm, in much the
same way as a motorcar changes from the top speed to its first.
âI was under the impression,â he said, in the heavy way almost
invariably affected by weak masters in their dealings with the
obstreperous, âI was distinctly under the impression that I had
ordered you to retire immediately to your dormitory. It is possible
that you mistook my meaning. In that case I shall be happy to repeat
what I said. It is also in my mind that I threatened to punish you
with the utmost severity if you did not retire at once. In these
circumstances, Jamesâand you, Jacksonâyou will doubtless see the
necessity of complying with my wishes.â
They made it so.
IN WHICH MIKE IS DISCUSSED
Trevor and Clowes, of Donaldsonâs, were sitting in their study a week
after the gramophone incident, preparatory to going on the river. At
least Trevor was in the study, getting tea ready. Clowes was on the
window-sill, one leg in the room, the other outside, hanging over
space. He loved to sit in this attitude, watching some one else work,
and giving his views on life to whoever would listen to them. Clowes
was tall, and looked sad, which he was not. Trevor was shorter, and
very much in earnest over all that he did. On the present occasion he
was measuring out tea with a concentration worthy of a general
planning a campaign.
âOne for the pot,â said Clowes.
âAll right,â breathed Trevor. âCome and help, you slacker.â
âToo busy.â
âYou arenât doing a stroke.â
âMy lad, Iâm thinking of Life. Thatâs a thing you couldnât do. I often
say to people, âGood chap, Trevor, but canât think of Life. Give him a
tea-pot and half a pound of butter to mess about with,â I say, âand
heâs all right. But when it comes to deep thought, where is he? Among
the also-rans.â Thatâs what I say.â
âSilly ass,â said Trevor, slicing bread. âWhat particular rot were you
thinking about just then? What fun it was sitting back and watching
other fellows work, I should think.â
âMy mind at the moment,â said Clowes, âwas tensely occupied with the
problem of brothers at school. Have you got any brothers, Trevor?â
âOne. Couple of years younger than me. I say, we shall want some more
jam to-morrow. Better order it to-day.â
âSee it done, Tigellinus, as our old pal Nero used to remark. Where is
he? Your brother, I mean.â
âMarlborough.â
âThat shows your sense. I have always had a high opinion of your
sense, Trevor. If youâd been a silly ass, youâd have let your people
send him here.â
âWhy not? Shouldnât have minded.â
âI withdraw what I said about your sense. Consider it unsaid. I have a
brother myself. Aged fifteen. Not a bad chap in his way. Like the
heroes of the school stories. âBig blue eyes literally bubbling over
with fun.â At least, I suppose itâs fun to him. Cheekâs what I call
it. My people wanted to send him here. I lodged a protest. I said,
âOne Clowes is ample for any public school.ââ
âYou were right there,â said Trevor.
âI said, âOne Clowes is luxury, two excess.â I pointed out that I was
just on the verge of becoming rather a blood at Wrykyn, and that I
didnât want the work of years spoiled by a brother who would think it
a rag to tell fellows who respected and admired meâ-â
âSuch as who?â
ââ-Anecdotes of a chequered infancy. There are stories about me
which only my brother knows. Did I want them spread about the school?
No, laddie, I did not. Hence, we see my brother two terms ago, packing
up his little box, and tooling off to Rugby. And here am I at Wrykyn,
with an unstained reputation, loved by all who know me, revered by all
who donât; courted by boys, fawned upon by masters. Peopleâs faces
brighten when I throw them a nod. If I frownâ-â
âOh, come on,â said Trevor.
Bread and jam and cake monopolised Clowesâs attention for the next
quarter of an hour. At the end of that period, however, he returned to
his subject.
âAfter the serious business of the meal was concluded, and a simple
hymn had been sung by those present,â he said, âMr. Clowes resumed his
very interesting remarks. We were on the subject of brothers at
school. Now, take the melancholy case of Jackson Brothers. My heart
bleeds for Bob.â
âJacksonâs all right. Whatâs wrong with him? Besides, naturally, young
Jackson came to Wrykyn when all his brothers had been here.â
âWhat a rotten argument. Itâs just the one used by chapsâ people, too.
They think how nice it will be for all the sons to have been at the
same school. It may be all right after theyâre left, but while theyâre
there, itâs the limit. You say Jacksonâs all right. At present,
perhaps, he is. But the termâs hardly started yet.â
âWell?â
âLook here, whatâs at the bottom of this sending young brothers to the
same school as elder brothers?â
âElder brother can keep an eye on him, I suppose.â
âThatâs just it. For once in your life youâve touched the spot. In
other words, Bob Jackson is practically responsible for the kid.
Thatâs where the whole rotten trouble starts.â
âWhy?â
âWell, what happens? He either lets the kid rip, in which case he may
find himself any morning in the pleasant position of having to explain
to his people exactly why it is that little Willie has just received
the boot, and why he didnât look after him better: or he spends all
his spare time shadowing him to see that he doesnât get into trouble.
He feels that his reputation hangs on the kidâs conduct, so he broods
over him like a policeman, which is pretty rotten for him and maddens
the kid, who looks on him as no sportsman. Bob seems to be trying the
first way, which is what I should do myself. Itâs all right, so far,
but, as I said, the termâs only just started.â
âYoung Jackson seems all right. Whatâs wrong with him? He doesnât
stick on side any way, which he might easily do, considering his
cricket.â
âThereâs nothing wrong with him in that way. Iâve talked to him
several times at the nets, and heâs very decent. But his getting into
trouble hasnât anything to do with us. Itâs the masters youâve got to
consider.â
âWhatâs up? Does he rag?â
âFrom what I gather from fellows in his form heâs got a genius for
ragging. Thinks of things that donât occur to anybody else, and does
them, too.â
âHe never seems to be in extra. One always sees him about on
half-holidays.â
âThatâs always the way with that sort of chap. He keeps on wriggling
out of small rows till he thinks he can do anything he likes without
being dropped on, and then all of a sudden he finds himself up to the
eyebrows in a record smash. I donât say young Jackson will land
himself like that. All I say is that heâs just the sort who does. Heâs
asking for trouble. Besides, who do you see him about with all the
time?â
âHeâs generally with Wyatt when I meet him.â
âYes. Well, then!â
âWhatâs wrong with Wyatt? Heâs one of the decentest men in the
school.â
âI know. But heâs working up for a tremendous row one of these days,
unless he leaves before it comes off. The odds are, if Jacksonâs so
thick with him, that heâll be roped into it too. Wyatt wouldnât land
him if he could help it, but he probably wouldnât realise what he was
letting the kid in for. For instance, I happen to know that Wyatt
breaks out of his dorm. every other night. I donât know if he takes
Jackson with him. I shouldnât think so. But thereâs nothing to prevent
Jackson following him on his own. And if youâre caught at that game,
itâs the boot every time.â
Trevor looked disturbed.
âSomebody ought to speak to Bob.â
âWhatâs the good? Why worry him? Bob couldnât do anything. Youâd only
make him do the policeman business, which he hasnât time for, and
which is bound to make rows between them. Better leave him alone.â
âI donât know. It would be a beastly thing for Bob if the kid did get
into a really bad row.â
âIf you must tell anybody, tell the Gazeka. Heâs head of Wainâs, and
has got far more chance of keeping an eye on Jackson than Bob has.â
âThe Gazeka is a fool.â
âAll front teeth and side. Still, heâs on the spot. But whatâs the
good of worrying. Itâs nothing to do with us, anyhow. Letâs stagger
out, shall we?â
*
Trevorâs conscientious nature, however, made it impossible for him to
drop the matter. It disturbed him all the time that he and Clowes were
on the river;
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