HAPPPHILOSOPHIES by Happy Angel Esquierdo (free ebook novel .txt) 📖

her for a while and I realized that she’s in pain. Her eyes bear sorrow. It’s the pain and sadness that keeps her going.

 

“That happened to me as well.” I feel guilty.  I was not supposed to bring back the pain she escaped, but now, it’s all coming back to her. “I lost him not because I loved him, but because I did not take the chance to tell him how I feel.”

“When he finally figured out and he told me that he feels the same way, I did not believe him because I know he likes someone and it’s not me. It’s the girl we’d been talking about.” Pain flashed within her eyes.

 

“Rejection is one of my greatest fear. So when I thought I was rejected by the only guy I loved, I kept my distance from him. And now… I’m here still pained from what I did.”

 

“Leaving without him is more painful than rejection, and not taking a chance to tell someone how you really feel about him/her is worse regrettable than letting them to know.” She wiped away the tears escaped her eyes.

 

She stood up and patted my head. “I wish you happiness couz.” She smiled and walked out of the room and I was left alone.

I lied on my bed for moments, thinking how would I tell her. I won’t repeat the same mistake my cousin did. I don’t want to live with regrets. Just let the chips fall where they may.

 

Two weeks passed by and they start dating, going out together. She looks happy with him and that tore my heart apart over and over again. Watching her with guys other than me makes me restless and disoriented.

 

Then the prom night came. I wear the black suit Angel bought for me. As the Student Council President, I made sure that everything about this night, from the decorations to the program, students and guests, would go smoothly and would go according to plan.

 

The girl I’ve been waiting finally arrived. She’s wearing a blue silk dress making her look elegant and beyond beautiful. Jeremy walked toward her and placed his arms around her waist. I held back my stare and avoid to catch a glimpse of them. The night went fairly well until it reached twelve midnight.

 

I held the microphone tight and breathtakingly stepped onto the stage. I got my guitar ready and took a deep breath. “Good evening ladies and gentlemen.” The guests, faculty members and students focus their attention to me.

 

“We all know that this is the last moment we could be altogether before we finally leave our beloved alma mater.” I  caught a glimpse of my classmates smiling as I continued. “Now, I would like to take this chance to finally tell how I feel for this girl.”

 

[Now Playing: Best Friend by Jason Chen]

 

Do you remember when I said I’d always be there.
Ever since we were ten, baby.
When we were out on the playground playing pretend.
Didn’t know it back then.

 

Since we’re kids, we’ve been together. We played games. We made fun stuffs. We hide from our moms and do disgusting things. We’re the little creatures running across the playground, throwing mud balls against each other, and laughing like there’s no tomorrow.

 

Now I realize you were the only one
It’s never too late to show it.
Grow old together,
Have feelings we had before
Back when we were so innocent.

 

I remember the day I vowed to stay with her, to protect her, and to never hurt her. It was the day when she was hit by a car and had been confined for a week. I was too afraid that I might lose her. So, I stayed with her for the whole week. I never left her side. I wait and wait until she opened her eyes.

 

I pray for all your love
Girl our love is so unreal
I just wanna reach and touch you, squeeze you, somebody pinch me
This is something like a movie
And I don’t know how it ends girl
But I fell in love with my Best Friend

 

I pray.. I pray that she will finally open her eyes. I am afraid to lose my best friend. I still want to see her smile, to make her laugh, and to hear her corny jokes. Thanks God and He answered my prayers. The moment she opened her eyes, we sealed the solemn promise of not leaving each other whatever happen. However, life is so playful. I did not expect what would happen. After I witness her smiles, laugh, cries, tantrums, plays, and craziness, I fell in love for her. I fell in love with my best friend.

 

Through all the dudes that came by
And all the nights that you’d cry.
Girl I was there right by your side.
How could I tell you I loved you
When you were so happy
With some other guy?

 

Years passed and I watched her fell in love with other guys. And I was thorn to see her cry. I want to tell her how I feel but every time I would have the guts, someone make her fall in love.

 

Now I realize you were the only one
It’s never too late to show it.
Grow old together,
Have feelings we had before
When we were so innocent.

 

But now, I wouldn’t let this chance passed without taking it. God. She is the only girl that I want. She is the only girl I loved for these past ten years, and she will be the only girl I would love for the rest of my life. Help me. God, please give her to me.

 

I pray for all your love
Girl our love is so unreal
I just wanna reach and touch you, squeeze you, somebody pinch me
This is something like a movie
And I don’t know how it ends girl
But I fell in love with my Best Friend

 

I looked at her as she held her stare to me. I don’t know what would happened after this but there’s no turning back. This is all I’ve got to tell you and the world how much I love you Regin.

 

I know it sounds crazy
That you’d be my baby.
Girl you mean that much to me.

And nothing compares when
We’re lighter than air and
We don’t wanna come back down.

And I don’t wanna ruin what we have
Love is so unpredictable.

But it’s the risk that I’m taking, hoping, praying
You’d fall in love with your best friend…

 

That girl is so special to me. She had been my past, the one that I love now, and my future. I don’t wanna ruin our friendship but I did this… because… I am hoping.. hoping that she will love me too.

 

I pray for all your love
Girl our love is so unreal
I just wanna reach and touch you, squeeze you, somebody pinch me
This is something like a movie
And I don’t know how it ends girl
But I fell in love with my Best Friend

 

I went down the stage and walked toward her. I saw sadness in her eyes. Why? Can’t she love me back? Please… Please love me too. Please… Please...

 

I pray for all your love
Girl our love is so unreal
I just wanna reach and touch you, squeeze you, somebody pinch me
This is something like a movie
And I don’t know how it ends girl
But I fell in love with my Best Friend…

 

I fell in love. Yes, I do... to you... I love you. And I promise …

 

I remember when I said I’d always be there
Ever since we were ten baby.

 

“Everyone, I fell in love with my best friend.” I said as I finished the song.

It’s been ten years now since I last saw her at our prom night. After what happened, she walked out of the party and never talked to me again. Her family migrated to America and I even not had a chance to see her. I felt depressed and washed out.

I got mad at her. Everything is a trash. She broke our promise and left me without any word. How could she!? And now, I, as one of the successful bachelors in the country, am here at our first batch reunion at La Costa Hotel and Resorts. I will show her that I’m not the guy who can she just ignore and reject like what she did ten years ago. I am not the martyr guy anymore.

 

“Hey Kent. Long time no see.” Alyssa greeted me. She’s our batch Valedictorian and one of my closest companion. “How are you doing? I heard you’re more successful than me.”  She said suspiciously. She’s light-headed, humorous, and easy-going girl.

 

“Maybe?” I answered and took a sip of the wine.

 

“Are you waiting for someone?” She noticed that I’m staring at the sea of faces in the party. “Don’t tell me you don’t know.”

“What?” I asked, examining what she’s talking about.

 

“Oh yeah. Sorry. I was the only person Regin trusted before she left and… died.”

 

“No. You’re kidding right? Haha. That’s funny Aly.” I laughed at her joke and patted her shoulders. “Good way of starting the night.” I complimented.

 

“No. I’m not kidding.” She looked at me sadly. “She wanted me to give you this.” She handed  me a caramel-colored envelop and she left.

 

My heart is beating so fast and dubbing wildly as I slowly opened it and pulled out a piece of paper. Tears escaped my eyes while my heart cracked, broke and shattered into pieces, as I read her note:

 

Dear Best friend,

 

I’m sorry I left without even saying goodbyes. I’m sorry I walked out of the party and never talked to you again. I’m sorry I ignored you and broke our promise. I’m sorry I was too afraid to hurt the guy I will love forever. I’m sorry I never told you. I was afraid that you get hurt if I do so.

 

Few minutes after writing this, the operation will start. Do you remember when you promised to never leave me? That’s when I was hit by a car. I’d been in comma for a week. Unfortunately, a brain tumor developed from that accident and I never really wanted to tell you. I know you’ll get hurt. I can’t afford to see you crying because of me. If ever you got the chance to read this, it means that I did not survived.

 

However, don’t be sad. I am the luckiest person in the world starting the day I met you. Be brave and live for me. That’s the least you can do for me now.

 

I promise that I have loved you Kent and I still love you. I do. I just don’t want you to know. Maybe, if I figured out earlier before my family knew I am dying, perhaps we had a chance. But as I have said, I love you.. more than myself… more than my own happiness. That’s why I chose not to let you know and to walk away.

 

Good bye.

 

For eternity,

 

Your Best friend

 

I run away from the reunion party and went to the shore. The sun is setting down and the white sands are sparkling. I closed my eyes, resisting the tears struggling to come out.

 

I… I was so stupid! How.. Why… Why can’t things be simple for me.. for us? Can’t I just have a happy ending? Perhaps, this is really it. Angel was right.

 

Maybe I couldn’t have what I want but at least I had the chance to tell her how I feel. Now I realized what would just be the ending if I had not told her? Regrets.

 

I lied on the sand and opened my eyes. I watched the sun setting down and held my pinky finger up. And I smiled.

 

“I promise… I’ll never forget the story of us… on how I fell in love with my best friend.”