Shadowless by Kareca (interesting books to read in english .txt) 📖

can come in.'

He walks in with his head down. He walks over to me and holds out the shoes. I take them and put them by the wig.

'Sorry for um... coming in just then. I kind of forgot.'

I pat him on the shoulder very robotic like. This made things a little weird between us. I turn around and grab the wig up...

'My parents are gone now, so you can come out.'

'Thank you, and it was not your fault so don't worry about that.'

He nods his head and I walk out of his room. I have to pull my hair back which I need a brush. Which a brush would be in the bathroom I guess. It takes a few minutes to pull my hair up and hide my hair. Yet I eventually am able to pull it off. I slip the wig on and make sure it looks okay. There is one problem I need eyeliner.
In the end of this whole process I am ready to go out. I have my shoes on now. Which they are heels actually, luckily it is only a one inch heel. Sometimes I have problems walking in heels. I try to forget what happened earlier. Maybe by this afternoon we both will have forgotten that incident. I seem to walk down the stairs first. I feel like a different person but the same person. I am not sure what I look like. Since I do not like judging myself.
I am taking these extra steps to ensure that no one knows who I am. For one because normally I do not wear that much make-up. For two I do not dress like this ever, unless I am alone. I feel very self consious about myself. It is a problem that is deeply rooted from all that horrile childhood teasing. Which Jessica was never much help with. We use to be horrible enemies. Not just the name calling but sometimes she would sneak into my house and cut my hair. Then I would sneak over to her house and steal a lawn gnome... after that I would put it right by her nightstand. One of her childhood fears was lawn gnomes. She told me later on that she thought they were going to eat her. We are still not that great of friends, it was only in middle school that she started being nice to my face. I can still feel the daggers in my back though.
I inspect my work, not bad for my first try. It still makes me question how Benji found all of this. I understand that the dress was for his now ex-girlfriend. Which if that is the case this is one of those outfits. The outfits that the guy thinks is hot... maybe I will just wait until he leaves. He was expecting to see his girlfriend wear this... that just makes it awkward. Now the wig may help calm me down. It was his aunts supposedly... I wonder what type of aunt she was? Why would she leave a wig here? I shrug my shoulders... I make sure the wig goes with everything and then I open the door. With that the humiliation comes back to me. Maybe I should just jump out the window. The feeling makes my chest hurt. Why I am not sure.
Deep breath, just breathe calmly. Get through this day and it should be easier the next. You know I have known Benji for a long time. When I would have sleep overs with Autumn he would stay in there with us. Until around middle school when he started inviting his friends over. He made sure to stay clear from us. I guess we were embarassing to him. I will think of last night like a sleepover, for old times sake. This morning he was not there, it was just my imagination. If I believe like that then maybe it will stop haunting me. I am trying to block out any other thoughts that may creep up into my mind. Most of which I expect may make me want to lose my appetite. I peek my head out into the hallway. I hear nothing, I see nothing... but I think I smell something burnt. Ah, Benji is probably trying to cook. He was well, he's Benji. You know everytime we called him that in public people would look at us strange. Especially when we were little. I think it is because there is this dog in a movie with that name. I never watched it so that is why I have no memory of it. My steps make a slight ticking sound on the floor. At least it is not a clomping sound.
When I get to the stairs I try to see how I am going to get down them. I think almost dying once in two days is enough for me. I grab the railing on the stairs and make slow steps. I never trusted myself in heels on stairs. It just seems like a disaster waiting to happen. I can almost imagine my crumpled body at the bottom. I bet Benji and Autumn's mom would have a fit. "Oh no not on my newly installed white but not white carpet. Ray hurry up and go get the steamer, before the stain sets in."
Ray is her husband, I often heard her call him that so it was something I remembered. Her name on the other hand I am not really sure what it is. I make it to the bottom and sigh relieved that I have managed thus far. I hear some cursing coming from the kitchen. I was right Benji was trying to cook. Which if he stays here much longer he maybe late for school. This place seems so familiar to me, it was always like my second home. I make myself turn right and go into the kitchen. I can not avoid everything.

'Benji you need some help?'

He throws down a slice of burnt toast onto the counter. You would figure a toaster would be easy to operate. He brushes off his fingers then looks up. My one eyebrow goes up in a questioning look. He looks at me then turns in another direction. I can tell that he is blushing his ears are turning pink. I wonder what he is thinking about? Wait no nevermind I do not want to know.

'Um... no I'm fine just trying to get something before I have to leave. Guess I'll just grab a poptart. Um... well... uh see ya later.'

He dahses out of the kitchen without another word. Well that was a nice conversation. See you later to? What a weird guy. I am not going to think of it, not going to. I turn around and look out of the kitchen window. You can clearly see into the neighbors house from here. They usually leave their living room windows open. Not a good choice for them. There is no oen in there so what is the harm of looking into their house? Yes granted sometimes you see things you do not want to. I have heard horrible stories. Like the one where someone was looking through windows while taking a walk. She ended up seeing a more heavyset man in a speedo through a big bay window. That makes me afraid to look into houses. I wait to hear the front door open and close. Nothing oh well maybe he left something upstairs. Someone goes into their neighbors living room. It is a girl pretty young maybe a year or two younger than me. Someone else walks into the room. I blink once, then twice before it sets in who it is.

'Ah... ack...'

I step back and bump into a table. I am blinded! Blinded I tell you! I turn to the otherside. Think of something else, happy place, happy place.

'What is it?'

Benji comes rushing back into the room. I motion for him to turn around. He should not have to see that.

'Don't look over there, trust me.'

He turns around and looks anyway.

'Oh my what is he doing over there? Here he is telling us to study for the exams this week and he's next door...'

'That just makes me sick. Who would have thought, isn't he like forty or something?'

He turns around to face the other wall. We talk back and forth about this for a while. We narrow it down that he is over forty but not yet fifty. He is one of the English teachers at our school. Which what I saw and what he saw... yeah something you never want to see again. That type of relationship with a student could get him fired, and sent to jail or prison. That is definitely under pedofile, and felony.
I just realized we are talking normally now. I guess one good thing came out of this. Some of the awkward tension has left.

'Okay I am going to school.You can leave through the back door. If someone were to see someone exiting this house like that there would be just something I do not want to explain.'

I smile and we talk a little bit more. He leaves the kitchen walking very quickly. The door opens and then closes with a thud. It makes me jump a little. I thrum my fingers on the tabletop. I should leave where to now? I think I need some coffee to wake me up a little more. I will forget what I saw. First to the coffee shop, sometimes just by talking to people you find out things. Then to the library, I will research some things online. I think I have a plan now.
Somehow I had made it out of the house undetected by any people in their houses. I make it to my favorite cafe and sit down inside. A double mocha cappuccino sounds pretty good. I observe the people in here. There is a guy by the window talking on a cellphone. He seems to be a little upset over something. A girl in a booth on the otherside of the door is talking very interested at a guy sitting across from her. The guy seems bored and is yawning. Three college guys are sitting in the back corner laughing and probably talking about fart jokes or sex. One of them seems more suspicious than the others. He resembles someone I have seen before. I try not to stare at him. I look around to the other side. Two girls are sitting on the other side of me talking about their current relationships. It suddenly hits me why the guy looks familiar.
He looks like a older version of Alex. He seems more mature but there is one difference. The hair color, his is bleached and white. I look away quickly why am I looking at him that much. It could just be coincidence. Is there any explanation? He could be his brother, but why would his brother be in town? I never really knew much about Alex I guess. If he did tell me something it is probably good to assume it was a lie. I hear someone's footsteps coming closer.

'Um excuse me do you mind if I get your number?'

I look around to face that guy. How did he get over here so fast? I have to make sure to change my voice. Luckly I have taken some extra classes afterschool for that. It was not my idea Autumn really wanted to be in those classes. Where am I from? France some foreign country? That