Unspoken: A story of secrets, love and revenge T. Belshaw (good books to read for beginners txt) 📖

I felt something stiff pushing against my thigh, so I dropped a hand down to it. Godfrey groaned.

‘Oh, Alice,’ he whispered, fumbling at his belt buckle.

Twenty seconds later we were at it. I leaned back on the desk, put my arms around his back and my feet around his backside.

The sex was much more hurried than it had been on my living room carpet, but it was still the second-best experience that I had ever had. When it was over, he tried to pull away but I held onto him until I was ready to let him go. He didn’t put up too much of a struggle.

When I eventually slid off the desk to find my knickers, I felt jubilant. I had proved to myself that I had power over a man. I already knew that I was as good as any man when it came to strength of character, but now, I felt a sort of mental strength I had never felt before. Men were bullies, they had to resort to superior physical strength, or lies and deceit to beat a woman down, but women should always have the right to say no, or yes, if they felt like it. I owned my body, not Frank, Godfrey or any other man for that matter. Rita Hayworth taught me a very important lesson. Today I was in control. Godfrey was every bit as weak and helpless as I had been when under attack from Frank. I smiled at him as he straightened his tie. He smiled a genuine, but subservient, smile back.

‘Would you like me to get you a taxi, Alice. I’ll pay for it.’

‘No, it’s all right, Godfrey,’ I replied. ‘Benny is waiting in the truck. I’ll be fine.’

He looked at his watch and cleared his throat. ‘Well, it was nice to see you, Alice, but, honestly, we really can’t do this again.’

I shook my head. ‘No, we can’t. I’ve had enough now. It’s time to move on.’

He looked at me strangely.

‘Alice, I don’t know what’s come over you. You were so innocent, unsure of yourself. You’ve changed, and I can’t say I like it too much.’

‘No? Ah well, never mind. I actually love the new me. To tell you the truth, I only discovered that person a few minutes ago, but I love her already. Let me tell you something, Godfrey. This young innocent has had to grow up very quickly, recently. You men always say you can’t understand women, but you don’t even try. You think a bit of flattery or a trinket or two will get them rolling over for a tummy tickle, but women eventually work you out, and when they do, they wonder why the hell they thought you were so complicated. You are the ones that roll over, and all it takes is the flash of a garter.’

I gave him a peck on the cheek and walked to the door. ‘Don’t let your wife smell the perfume on your collar, Godfrey, or you could still lose everything.’

I walked past Miss Johnston with the confident air of a woman of the world. ‘He’ll be out in a moment. Don’t worry, there’s no work for you this time. I’ve already filed it.’

With that, I tossed my Rita Hayworth curls and strode smartly out of the building. Half an hour before, I had stepped into Godfrey’s office, an easy to please, walk over, but I left it feeling like a confident, powerful woman. I felt liberated.

The memory of Frank’s attack would never leave me, but now I had a new weapon to fight the horror, whenever it surfaced. I had put Frank in a box and he would never be allowed out of it for long. Benny was catching up on some sleep when I got back to the lorry. I woke him by slamming the passenger door shut, and we drove back to the farm, chatting about the harvest.

Lying in bed that night, I felt I had been justified in my actions. Godfrey was just another Frank, albeit without the brutal instincts. I had now accepted that there would be no justice for me, so the best thing I could do was try to move on with my life. I made up my mind that I would always look for the positives, and that would start with the truth about me. I was more than just a pleasure doll for men; I had my own wants and needs. I felt helpless during Frank’s attack, but today, I felt that I was in total command of the situation. Okay, I had taken advantage of someone myself this time, but I didn’t feel guilty about it. We made love because I wanted to, not because some man or other fancied his leg over. Anyway, Godfrey could hardly say I forced him into it against his will. He didn’t say no, did he? I laughed at that thought, as it was usually the accusation that was aimed at women. Today, had been my decision, my choice and that’s how it was going to be from this day on. I would have sex when I felt like having sex, regardless of my relationship status. In future, men would play by my rules, or they wouldn’t play at all. I felt a sort of release. I had to talk to Amy about it. Mind you, knowing Amy, she had already worked it out.

Chapter 78

Jess

Alice stopped Jess reading at eleven o’clock.

‘I’ve had enough now, Jessica, I don’t want to hear more of that part of my story. It’s etched on my memory. I think I’d like to go to sleep now.’

Jess put down the book and gave Alice her antibiotic along with her sleeping pill, and by eleven-thirty, she was asleep.

No wonder she didn’t want to relive it. Jess wept quietly for her teenage, great grandmother suffering an attack that ought to have meant prison for an uncaring, brute of a man.

She read on,