Marry Me G. Hauser (the chimp paradox .TXT) 📖

do—pretend last night

never happened, or beg his forgiveness.

~

Fabian had to pee from all the coffee. He checked his watch

and it was nearing eleven. He couldn’t hide in his office all day.

Standing, buttoning his suit jacket, Fabian opened his door

slowly and looked down the hall.

Brianna was not at her desk and he could hear Braxton’s

voice coming from inside his office, possibly indicating he was

on the phone.

Fabian walked quickly out the door and down the long

corridor to the men’s room. He took care of business and washed

his hands, looking at his reflection in the mirror. The night of

lousy sleep made him feel rough and exhausted.

By the time he returned he caught Brianna exiting the

elevator, a white bag from a café in her hand. He opened the

door to the office for her and asked, “Do you mind going out all

the time for our food?”

“No. I want the brisk walk and it gets me away from the

phones for a while. Why?”

“I just really appreciate it.” Fabian spun around when

Braxton opened his office door, holding paperwork. The two

connected gazes and looked away simultaneously.

Brianna put her purse on the desk beside the bag of food and

blew out a loud breath in frustration. “What the hell happened to

you two last night? Are you kidding me? I have to deal with this

now too?”

“Nothing happened. We’re fine.” Braxton looked into the

white bag.

When Brianna met his gaze, Fabian didn’t know what to say.

‘ Nothing?’ It wasn’t ‘nothing’ to him.

“I swear, you two need a rubber room, or you’re going to put

me in one.” She snatched the bag out of Braxton’s hand abruptly

and pushed them both by the shoulder. “Go eat together in the

fucking lunchroom and get out of my face!”

In the short time he had worked with her, Fabian had never

seen Brianna upset. He headed to the break room and removed a

bottle of water from the refrigerator.

Once Brianna set the bag on the table and left, Braxton dug

out the contents to share. The silence was like a lead weight

between them.

“You want water, Braxton?” Fabian asked softly.

“No. She bought juice.”

Fabian noticed two bottles of high vitamin-enriched juice and

put the water back, as Braxton nudged Fabian’s food to his side

of the table.

“So?” Fabian couldn’t take the tension. “Got what you

wanted?”

“She always gets good food.” He folded the bag and tossed it

out.

“I didn’t mean lunch.”

Braxton met Fabian’s eyes. “Why did you shut off your

phone last night?”

Guilt hit Fabian. “I thought…”

“You thought?” Braxton’s tone and temper appeared to rise.

“I thought you were in a car wreck! That’s what I thought!”

“I…” Fabian watched as Braxton sat on a chair, in a huff, and

opened the plastic top of his salad. “I’m sorry. I wasn’t sure how

to react to what happened.”

“Yeah. You were sure. You were sure I was using you and

you cut me off.”

It was true. Fabian reached out and touched Braxton’s hair

with his fingertips. Braxton closed his eyes and seemed to want

to decompress. “I’m sorry. I did. That’s exactly what I thought.”

When Braxton met his gaze, he appeared so hurt. “We signed

a contract.”

“It was about work.” Fabian joined Braxton at the table,

leaning over it to speak softly to him. “You promised not to fire

me.”

“And I won’t. Ever.” Braxton clenched his fist and it was

then Fabian noticed the knuckles of his hand were skinned. “But

I thought it was more than that. Not just about work.”

Fabian made contact with Braxton’s hand and inspected the

raw skin. He knew the signs. Braxton had punched a wall. “Did

you make a whole in your plasterboard?”

“No. I hit the concrete of my parking garage.” Braxton began

to eat, moving away from the touch.

“You are so intense.”

“You have no idea. I told you. I can’t deal with anything.”

“What will it take for you to trust someone?”

“Don’t know.” Braxton ate his salad, looking down at his

food.

“Time? Will you give me a little time? Let me prove to you I

can be that guy?”

“What guy?” Braxton glanced up at him.

“The guy you want to stay with.”

Shaking his head and laughing sadly, Braxton replied, “You

don’t want to be with me. Not like that.”

“Why don’t I?” Fabian opened the top to his salad.

“Because I just told you how impossible I am. I’ll end up

driving you crazy. As…”

“As?”

“Never mind.” Braxton continued to eat his food.

Fabian wasn’t going to beg. No way. If Braxton wanted him,

he knew where to find him. “I’ll be at my desk if you need me.”

Fabian took the lunch with him and closed his office door,

fuming and wondering if all this self-criticism of Braxton was a

way to play the cliché card. ‘ Oh it’s not you that’s the problem, it’s me! ’ Classic.

~

What was Braxton supposed to say to him? ‘ I’ll be fine once

I’m on meds? ’ It was humiliating he was even considering going to the doctor for help.

“Are you kidding me?” Brianna entered the lunch room and

stood beside him. “Where’s Fabian?”

“Eating his lunch in his office.”

“Christ, Braxton. Maybe I’m the one who has it wrong and

you are a prick!” She left him sitting alone.

Braxton dropped his plastic fork on his salad and slouched in

the chair, feeling like the worst heel.

The phones were ringing at Brianna’s desk so she headed

back to it. Braxton rose to his feet, tossed his empty container

into the trash and carried his juice with him back to his office.

Pausing, he pressed his ear to Fabian’s door to hear him taking

one of the many calls. Braxton closed his eyes and envisioned

Fabian, naked from the waist down, being fucked by him in the

front seat of his car.

His cheek pressed against the wood, listening to the tone but

unable to catch all the words, Braxton craved Fabian, and not

only for sex. He sensed a true heart in that man, one who has

been hurt and yet was willing to go out on a limb and try again.

When the conversation stopped beyond the door, Braxton

gained his composure and continued to his office, seeing Brianna

avoiding his eye as she spoke on her headset and typed

simultaneously.

It was Friday, and if Braxton did nothing, he’d miss Fabian

all weekend.

He couldn’t recall the last person whom he