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a what?”

“You know that fable about the ant and the grasshopper? You’re gonna be a success, I know it. But me, I’m a—” She made a sound somewhere between a giggle and a hiccup. “A fuckin’ bumble bee, fat and clumsy.”

How could she think he was hung up on her size, after the way he’d worshiped her lush body? No one with eyeballs and half a brain could deny her allure. “Rosie, you’re the most gorgeous woman who ever breathed. There isn’t a minute we’re together when I don’t want to undress you and taste every glorious inch of your skin.”

She squeezed his hand. “Thank you, Eddie, but I’m talking about my personality, not my body. I’m such a bumbler, you know? Sometimes I land somewhere soft and sweet, like your bed. Sometimes I bonk into things—or people—and inflict pain.” She shook her head so hard a sparkly hair pin dropped into her satin-covered lap.

“Rosie, you’re wrong.” He cupped her cheek until she met his gaze with tear-bright eyes. “You fit me perfectly. With you at my side I feel brave and smart and sure. Every couple hits speed bumps like this, and I know we can work through it if we just—”

A rap on the window made them both jump. His parents stood there, Dad scowling at his oversize gold watch, Mama beaming, oblivious to the drama. “Come on, you two lovebirds. Don’t want to miss the open bar.”

He cracked the window. “We’ll be there in just a moment.”

“Come on, Alina,” Dad grumbled. “They’re kissing. Let them be.”

Mama’s giggle trailed behind her. “Remember when you used to kiss me like that?”

The irony curdled his stomach. Here they were at a wedding, a celebration of lasting love. Watching his cousin and her fiancé exchange vows, he imagined himself and Rosie at the altar, her in a frothy white gown that hugged her curves, him in a snazzy tux. And now she was pulling away.

He pulled his key from the ignition, then paused. “Should I just take you home?”

“No.” With her soggy tissue, she blotted the smudges beneath her eyes. “I said I’d stick with you through the wedding, and I will.” She squeezed his hand. “Let’s try to have fun.”

“And afterward?”

She didn’t answer—just popped out of her seat, squared her shoulders, and waited for him. Arm in arm, they slogged through the slush toward the twinkling ballroom.

Ballroom, gloom, doom. He couldn’t even get drunk to ease the pain, since he was Rosie’s ride home. This was going to be a nightmare.

His hand on the small of Rosie’s back, Eddie paused in the ballroom doorway. Cousin Irina and her proud parents had pulled out all the stops. A bazillion twinkle lights fluttered overhead and from bundles of gold-painted twigs in tall white urns.

As they passed, Rosie bopped a cluster of pale pink heart-shaped balloons and muttered, “Looks like the sparkly love child of Winter Wonderland and Valentine’s Day.”

His aunt beckoned them toward a seating chart on an easel. “Eduard, sweetheart, how big and handsome you’ve grown!” She clutched his shoulders and pecked his cheeks. “Introduce me to your lady love.”

A grimace flicked over Rosie’s face. She extended her hand. “Hi, I’m Rosie Chu, Eddie’s friend from work.”

Might as well stab me with an icicle.

The woman winked. “Just a work friend? That’s not what Alina tells me.” She enveloped Rosie in a tight hug. “I’m Auntie Anna. Welcome to the family, darling.”

Anna pointed them toward a round table tightly packed with gold-rimmed place settings and scattered with heart-shaped confetti. There was no way he and Rosie could continue their discussion, or even eat without getting jabbed by relatives’ elbows.

As they wove through the crowd, Eddie whispered, “So we’re back to fake dating again?”

She looped her purse handle over her assigned chair. “We’ll talk later, okay? We’re here to put on a show and keep your family off your back.”

He grabbed her hand. “Rosie, there’s nothing fake about my feelings for you. Don’t shut me out.”

The smile she flashed him was wide and phony and just this side of feral. “We’ll. Talk. Later.”

“Okay, okay.” Time for a tactical retreat, but there was no way he would surrender this battle. “You want a drink?”

“Several.”

While they waited at the bar, Rosie fielded introductions with the same playful warmth she showed customers at Bangers. Damn, she was a good actor, looping her arm through Eddie’s and gracefully dancing around nosy questions.

“How long have you two been together?”

“We’ve known each other about a year.”

True, and I’ve wanted you every single day of that year.

“How did you meet?”

“At work. Eddie’s the new assistant manager.” She pecked his cheek.

Yeah, for two weeks. If she kept this up, he’d have even more embarrassing questions to answer when he reverted to plain old barback.

His cousin Eva, always good for a few laughs, nudged him with her hip and pointed her chin toward the bar. “Could they be any slower? You should step in there and crank out some drinks before we all die of thirst.”

“Right?” Rosie wound her arm around Eddie’s waist. “We should’ve brought a flask.”

Eva grinned. “I like this one, Eddie. Glad to see your taste in women is improving.” She stuck out her hand. “Eva Petrov, black sheep of the family.”

Eva’s fishnet stockings and sparkly high-heeled sneakers were nothing compared to Rosie’s abundant ink and sapphire hair. Even in a simple satin dress, she outshone every woman in the room.

She chuckled. “Rosie Chu. I’m Eddie’s—” She turned to him, and her smile faltered. “You know, special friend.”

“Gotcha.” Eva clapped her shoulder. “Stop by our table later. I stuffed my purse with mini bottles.”

At last, it was their turn at the bar, where they picked up tumblers of the bride’s “signature cocktail,” a bright pink, too-sweet mixture with lots of vodka and a spear of booze-soaked Rainier cherries.

Rosie took a sip and grimaced. “Wow. Maybe don’t add this one to your menu.” She nibbled a cherry, and his poor, clueless dick throbbed. “These are killer, though.”

He gulped his drink,

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