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you believing in me. I’d be honored to follow in your footsteps.”

“I’m honored to hand down the reigns, my dear.”

I went back to my desk with mixed emotions. Nothing surprised me anymore. Uncertain feelings and confusion were the norm for me.

Gage: I know its short notice, but can you meet on lunch?

Me: That’s in twenty minutes, but yes. Will you be able to make it in time?

Gage: Yes. Heading out soon.

Me: See you then.

The details of our meeting place didn’t have to be discussed. His gym parking lot became the place when our meeting would be short. As filthy and wrong as it was, it didn’t bother me a bit. As long as I was able to see him, I’d do whatever I had to.

I raced to the gym, anxious to see his face. It’d been almost a full week, but that felt like an eternity. Not being able to be with the one you love every day was torture. Meeting in a random parking lot with the risk of getting caught was a chance I was willing to take.

He reached across the seat and opened the door for me and I climbed in quickly. I didn’t say a word, just wrapped my arms around his neck and kissed him hard. Neither of us dared to pull away as we took our time reconnecting.

“I love you,” he said, finally pulling back. I loved how often he said those words. It made me really believe they were true.

“I love you.” I replied.

We sat close to each other, our fingers linked together as we talked.

“How have you been?” I asked.

“Been alright. Things at home have been rough.” He said.

“I’m sorry. Unfortunately, I know the feeling.”

“I’m seriously thinking about leaving. I’ve been looking at houses.”

“Oh.” I said.

My heart did a happy-dance immediately. His leaving meant good things for our future. Although hearing him say that left me elated, I knew mentioning our potential future wasn’t a good idea. Not at this particular time. I still had a heart. Separating from your spouse is never easy, regardless of the circumstances.

“I’m so over all the crap.”

“I’m sure things will work themselves out.” I said. I hoped they didn’t, but my luck was terrible. Deep down, I had a feeling he wasn’t leaving quite yet.

“All I want is you,” he said, pulling me on top of him.

No more words were exchanged as we collided and he filled every part of me. If he wanted me, I’d gladly surrender. We moved in sync, reaching a high and coming down together every step of the way. It was times like this when I knew that Gage was the one for me. We fit so perfectly together; nothing could break the mold.

***

Marcus strolled through the door at eight that evening, just as he always did. He didn’t look like he was in pain anymore, but I was no longer concerned. At least I told myself I wasn’t.

“What did the doctor say?” I asked.

“Blood pressure was still high. He referred me to the cardiologist, which we already knew would happen. I go Thursday.” He said.

“Good. Well, not the blood pressure, but it’s good that you have an appointment with the cardiologist, because that’s what you needed. Now maybe they can get you straightened out.”

“I guess. How was your day?” he asked.

“It was good.” I said, thinking about my lunch break with Gage. I hoped I didn’t look too excited, but thinking about my time with him definitely put a huge smile on my face.

“Good.” He said, heading upstairs. I followed behind him.

“So, my boss called me into his office today,” I started. “He said he put in his notice and that he’s really retiring at the end of the month. He said he wants me to go for his position.”

“Really?”

“Yeah. I have to apply and interview like normal, but he said he’s already put in a good word for me. I think I’m going to go for it.”

“Good. You should.” He said.

And that was it. No happiness in his tone or words of encouragement. Maybe the doctor had him stressed, or maybe it was because he didn’t care. There were so many secrets between us, I didn’t know what was going on with him anymore. I used to know him like the back of my hand.

That was a depressing thought.

Chapter Twenty-Nine

 

The days that followed were normal. At least, my normal. Nothing would ever be the same again, but I’d learned to live with the direction of my life until I decided to change it. At this rate, I didn’t know when that would be. I was a freaking mess.

Gage didn’t speak another word about finding a house and leaving his wife. I knew he wouldn’t. They probably had a rough argument and he was wound up tight when he spewed those words. I knew better than to believe that he was actually leaving, no matter how much I hoped it was true. I was in his shoes; I knew his feelings. He was just like me…holding on. I was sure his child was the reason for his attachment, but mine…mine was unknown.

Marcus visited the cardiologist, and no major problems were found. His blood pressure was still high, so he was placed on a medication to level it out. He’d go back in a month for a follow-up to see if the issue was resolved. To no surprise, there was no change in our relationship. Occasionally he’d make a sexual advance, and I’d managed to skip around any physical contact…for the most part. I had a hard time being involved with Marcus when my heart belonged to Gage. I knew he didn’t want me either. It had to end eventually.

Mike had been working with me to help

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