Mister West R.J. Lewis (macos ebook reader txt) 📖

run a hand over my face, exhausted. “Fine,” I whisper.

Immediately, he comes to me, eyes bloodshot, filled with fear. “Don’t, Ivy. Don’t leave.”

I don’t answer as I look back at him.

He drags his nails over his scalp, looking lost. “Why, Ivy? Why? You’re all I know. All we have is each other.”

“This isn’t new. I’ve told you for a long time now –”

“But we always find our way back again.”

“No, not this time. You’re refusing to accept this.”

“How can I?” He shakes his head, looking wild. “Why are you doing this? It’s come out of nowhere.”

“It hasn’t.”

“It has! Usually, I can get through to you. I give it a few weeks. I give it time and you come around and you end this nonsense about leaving. You see what it does to me, and you come to me and you take it all back! You’re not taking it back yet! This isn’t you! Why are you doing this?” he repeats hysterically. “Why? Why do you want to run from this? Unless…”

Unless…

I just stare at him, feeling my eyes sting.

“Is there someone else?” he questions, face twisted up. “Is…is that why? I don’t understand. Are you…are you talking to someone?”

I swallow hard. My lips tremble. “I…”

I feel suffocated.

“Ivy, is there another man?”

Say no, say no.

I whisper, “Yes.”

Because I don't want to lie. I want to be free with my choices.

His face falls, and he looks at me with disbelief. Silence falls over us. His breathing is heavy and mine is mute. I’m holding in my breath. I’m trying to be brave, but this is hard.

“He didn’t influence my decision.” I try making him understand. “This needs to end regardless. I am not coming back to you. I haven’t been happy for a very long time. You confuse me, Derek, because one minute you’re accepting that we’re done, and then you’re storming around, pissed off at me like you think it’s come out of nowhere –”

“Who the fuck is the man?” he cuts in, his voice cold. “Is he someone I know?”

“He doesn’t matter.”

His face twists. “He does fucking matter –”

“I came to this decision long before I met him –”

“I want to know his name.”

“This has nothing to do with him –”

“Is this revenge for what I did?”

“Don’t talk about that again!”

“I cheated on you once and you’re doing it back?”

I’m blown away. “I didn’t cheat on you. We’ve been separated. Don’t play the victim, Derek. You come home smelling like perfume all the time and suddenly it’s different because it’s me?”

He’s so angry, his nostrils flare. “I don’t believe you. You’ve been fucking a man from before we were separated –”

“Now you’re saying that to ease your own guilt –”

“It’s true –”

“No, it’s not!”

My phone vibrates from the kitchen – no, no, no – and my eyes widen as he looks over my shoulder. A dark look crosses his face. Before I react, he’s pushing past me, slamming his shoulder against mine. I fall back against the wall as he hurries into the kitchen. I stand up quickly and rush in after him. He grabs my phone off the charger before I get to it.

“Not like this, Derek,” I plead. “Not like this…”

My words die as he swipes the screen. I hurry to grab the phone from his hand, but he twists around, using his strength to keep me at bay.

“It’s my phone, Derek,” I say, angrily.

“Who is messaging you?”

“Give me my phone!”

“Who the fuck are you talking to?” he rants. “You’re fucking someone else. That’s why you won’t let me touch you. Months of nothing! You haven’t let me touch you from before you went away because of him! You’re fucking him –”

“I haven’t done anything like that! We talk.”

“With WHO?”

But before I can respond, he asks, “Who the fuck is A.W.?”

Shit.

“Give me my phone!” I growl.

He pushes me so hard, my back slams against the counter. The breath is knocked out of me as he strides away. He slams the bathroom door shut, locking himself in with my phone.

My heart is beating in my ears. My hands are shaking. Panicked, I stand there, for minutes and minutes, waiting for him to come out.

“Who the fuck are you?!” he shrieks in the bathroom. “Show your fucking face around here, you little cunt! You know where I live? You’re fucking my woman? I’ll fucking kill you!”

My heart drops in my chest. Oh, my God. He called him. I race to the door and bang on it.

“Derek, stop!” I tell him. “Leave him alone! This has nothing to do with him! We haven’t done anything, Derek!”

The door whips open and Derek storms out, peering down at me with cold eyes.

“You’re fucking another man –”

“No!”

“Yes, you are! I read those messages –”

“Nothing happened like that. We just talk –”

“He says he wants you –”

“Jesus, Derek, he just talks –”

“He talks to you like he knows everything about you!” His voice cracks. “You’ve fucked him!”

“I haven’t!”

“This has been going on forever, hasn’t it?”

“No!”

“From before you left.”

“Would you stop and listen? I said NO.”

He’s so angry, he pushes me hard the next time I reach for my phone. I lose balance and fall back on my ass. I stare at him, shocked. He smashes the phone down hard on the floor beside me, then he stomps on it, breaking the screen. My heart is speeding so fast in my chest. I feel sick just staring at the damage.

This is why you left the first time, Ivy. How could you come back to this?

“How long has it been going on then?” he seethes. “How long, Ivy?”

One second I’m bewildered that he’s destroyed something else that’s mine. The next second my flight response kicks in and I’m standing up, rushing past him and to my room. I’ve had enough of this. I need to get out. Derek has gone off the deep end. Like he did the last time I left. This isn’t safe anymore. I worried this might happen. He will break everything in front