The Truth According to Ginny Moon Benjamin Ludwig (books to read in your 30s .txt) 📖

The Other Ginny just sits there. Not moving. I’m guessing she has nothing inside her to say. I’m guessing she is an empty girl. A girl with a face I don’t know.

Gloria looks down and puts her hand on the girl’s head. Then Gloria points at me. The Other Ginny stands up with her and Gloria puts her arm around her shoulders. Gloria points at me again and then they both wave. Slowly so that no one will hear them.

I start to hyperventilate. Which means breathing too fast. Because I am angry. Because I want to get the Other Ginny’s eyes so she can’t look at me. Because I have been replaced which is what happens when your old earbuds are broken and you get new ones and throw the first ones out.

Someone yells my name.

I look around but I don’t want to see who it is. People run past me. I look back at Gloria and the Other Ginny to see what they’ll do next. I don’t see them at first but when I finally find them Gloria puts her finger in front of her lips. That means she wants me to be quiet. She did that once when Donald came out of the bathroom yelling bad words. I was behind the couch and when Gloria saw me she put her finger in front of her mouth so I was quiet and she started yelling and then Donald beat the hell out of her instead of me and then—

“Ginny!” someone else yells again and before I see who it is I get knocked over. By Brenda Richardson and some people I don’t know. There are lots of sneakers and legs and arms on top of me and I try to push them away but I can’t. Finally they get off and I roll over and fix my glasses and stand and try to see where Gloria is. I see her again. I start to put my hand up to wave but then I clamp it over my mouth instead.

“Ginny?” says Coach Dan. I don’t see him but when I turn around there he is. “Are you all right?” he says.

I nod my head yes. When I look back up into the stands I see that Gloria and the Other Ginny are walking down the bleachers toward the floor.

“Ginny, why don’t you take a break?” says Coach Dan. “Go have a seat on the bench. We’ll put you in a little later when you’re feeling better. Have some water and maybe go to the bathroom.”

The bathroom. That is where Gloria is going, I’m guessing. She is going to the bathroom because that is where she used to meet me when we were in a supermarket or a store or a place where she had to talk with her dealer. If you lose track of me, go to the bathroom, she used to say. She wants me to go there now, I’m guessing. I will go see her. I will ask her where my Baby Doll is. I will tell her she has to feed it more because it’s losing weight. If it’s out in the parking lot I’ll run out there and take it.

I make my hands into tight, tight fists. I have to be strong.

There are a lot of people walking around in the gym. I walk between them and around them and I am not going in a straight line but I will be okay because my brain remembers where it is bringing me.

When I get to the bathroom I go right in. I see four white sinks and six green bathroom stalls and some ladies who I don’t know. I don’t see Gloria or the Other Ginny. I look and I look but they are not here. So I leave the bathroom and walk back out into the hallway and someone says my name.

I look. I still see lots of people but I don’t see who called me.

“Ginny?” the voice calls again.

It is a small voice. I turn and look. A little girl is standing far away next to a popcorn machine. She has hair that looks just like mine used to look. Her eyes are green.

It is the Other Ginny.

I’m guessing she’s mostly in kindergarten or in first grade. She is small enough to make an acorn out of construction paper and to paste her picture on it to put on a bulletin board. She is too small for me to be mad at. Even if she replaced me I don’t want to get her eyes out like Michelle Whipple’s.

The Other Ginny starts walking. Toward me. Closer and closer.

When she gets to me she smiles.

She isn’t teasing or making fun. She is in front of me just smiling. Then I see that she’s holding something in her hand. She holds it up for me to see.

It is a picture of me when I was nine years old. In it I am holding my Baby Doll.

I want to grab it. I want to put it near my eyes and look and look and look. I want to see my Baby Doll’s tiny face and hands but the Other Ginny takes the picture away and runs back the way she came. She moves out of people’s way like a squirrel or a cat. She runs down the hall and ducks and then stops. And looks back at me. She is standing next to the popcorn machine again.

With Gloria.

I don’t hear any sound at all. The ground is flat and hard under my feet. It is like I am standing on the back of a giant equal sign even though I can’t see it. So I take a step toward them. Gloria looks at me and puts her finger in front of her mouth. I want to yell What are you doing here? You should be taking care of my Baby Doll! but no sound comes out. I try again but I can’t talk. So