Infinity Reaper Adam Silvera (best books to read in life .txt) 📖

beautiful you are under the moon like some sappy poet, but I’m taking the hint that you’re not interested in me. Does my breath smell like that salve? Or is there someone else?”

Not once have Wyatt and I even talked about who we’re into, but I know that Halo Knight culture as a whole has always been really accepting of queer people. I wasn’t counting on him to be so forward about this. Definitely not tonight.

“Are those the only two options for why I’m not falling for your charms?”

“You think I’m charming, then.”

“No. I mean sure, yeah. You’re cool people and your accent has scored you tons of points in my book.”

“But?”

“There is someone. There was someone. We weren’t dating or anything and I’m not sure what he thought about me, but I was attracted to this guy Ness.”

Wyatt picks up a rock and hurls it down to the river. “Damn, that’s a great name. I was hoping for a Chad or Bobby. I can conquer all the Chads and Bobbys.”

I realize I have no idea why Ness picked that name. “His real name is Eduardo. He chose the name Ness after he became a Blood Caster.”

“Way to bury the lede!”

“Believe it or not, that’s not the lede. Ness was Senator Iron’s son. The one who supposedly died in the Blackout.”

Wyatt’s blue eyes widen with shock. “Wow. Well, I see why you’re resisting my charms. I can’t compete against a bad boy who came back from the dead.”

“He wasn’t a bad guy. Ness faked his death because his father was a terrible influence on him.”

“Joining your country’s most lethal gang makes him good?” Wyatt asks, a surprising edge in his voice.

This isn’t news to me, I’ve been a direct target of theirs for weeks. “The Blood Casters saved his life and offered him shifter blood to hide from his father. His choices sucked.”

“I would die before I willingly take in the blood of any creature.”

I don’t want to throw Ness under the bus, but me too. Though it’s not right for me to judge him when I still don’t even know his full story. “Ness was good. He was forced to kill Luna’s enemies, but he isn’t proud of that. It traumatized him so badly that he would wake up in the form of his victims. And when he had the opportunity to run away, he came back to save me. I didn’t see him die, but I’m pretty damn sure it cost him his life.”

I’m shaking and it’s not because of the salve.

Wyatt closes the space between us with open arms. “May I?”

I let him hug me. I’ve already cried into his arms once today; I don’t have more tears in me. Thinking about Ness makes me feel both dead inside and guilty for being alive.

“Maybe he got away,” Wyatt says. “He’s certainly faked his death before. He could be anyone in this world.”

I would love to live in that fantasy. I wouldn’t blame Ness if he managed to escape the enforcers and decided it was too risky to try to find me again. If only I knew he were alive, I could find so much happiness in that thought alone, even if it meant we couldn’t be together. I would spend the rest of my life picturing Ness as different people, questioning if the person who is staring at me for a second too long or smiling as they pass me on the street is Ness in disguise. I just want him alive and I want him with someone where he can be himself, even if it’s only in private. I’d hate for that face to be hidden from the world forever.

But there’s this gut feeling that something has gone terribly wrong with Ness.

The sound of the car pulling up catches my attention and we break our hug. Prudencia parks again at the other side of the drawbridge. They get out of the car and Brighton looks really beat up with his ripped shirt and bandaged forehead. He helps Prudencia, who’s limping toward us. I run toward them, the salve already working its magic and reducing my pain.

“What the hell is that smell?” Brighton asks, taking a step back and coughing.

“I love you, Emil, but you smell like death,” Prudencia says as she presses an ice pack against her black eye and covers her nose.

“And you two look like it. What happened?”

“We were ambushed by some specter,” Prudencia says.

“With reaper powers. Ghost phasing included,” Brighton says. “But we still had him beat.”

I hug them both at the same time. “I’m so glad you’re okay.”

Brighton gags. “Seriously, did a phoenix piss on you? What is that smell?”

“A healing salve,” Wyatt says. “Phoenix urine smells more like—”

“Did you get Ma’s clothes?” I ask, interrupting Wyatt.

Brighton and Prudencia exchange the kind of glance that can’t possibly mean anything good. Was the apartment raided? Everything tossed since we haven’t been around to pay rent?

“Tell him,” Prudencia says.

Brighton lets out a deep sigh. “Today wasn’t exactly a win for Team Infinity.”

Forty-TwoPredecessor

EMIL

My home is gone forever.

Everything that belonged to us, to Ma, to Dad has been destroyed. Every day in this war it feels like we’re getting closer and closer to being erased from history. Like someone will succeed in killing us sooner or later and the world will move on. Then I’ll be reborn, maybe Brighton too, and there will be no remnants of the Reys of Light for us to connect to—no pictures, no art, no personal tokens.

Brighton and Prudencia are drained so they head to bed, but between all my rest today and this news, I’m wired. It’s chilly out, even as the salve’s effect begins wearing off, so Wyatt and I sit close, with our shoulders pressed together; we’ve both gotten used to the stench by now.

I’m about to break down when Wyatt asks me about what my home life has been like over the years. It’s painful sharing memories of simpler times, but this is how I