How to Analyze People on Sight by Elsie Lincoln Benedict (best contemporary novels txt) 📖

You will exist but you will never know what it is to live.

The Hungry Philosopher

¶ The extreme Cerebral can sit on a park bench with an empty purse and an empty stomach and get as much pleasure out of reflecting on the "whichness of the what and the whitherness of the wherefore" as an Alimentive gets out of a planked steak. Needless to say, each is an enigma to the other. Yet most people imagine that because both are human and both walk on their hind legs they are alike. They are no more alike than a cow and a canary.

His Frail Body

¶ The extreme Cerebral type finds it difficult to do things because, as we have seen, he is deficient in muscle—one of the vital elements upon which activity and accomplishment are based. This type has little muscle, little bone, and little fat.

Deficient in "Horse Power"

¶ He is not inactive for the same reason that the Alimentive is; his stomach processes do not slow him down. But his muscles are so undeveloped that he has little inward urge toward activity and little force back of his movements. His heart and lungs are small, so that he also lacks "steam" and "horse power."

He prefers to sit rather than to move, exactly as the Muscular prefers to be "up and doing" rather than to sit still.

The Man of Futile Movements

¶ Did you ever look on while a pure Cerebral man tried to move a kitchen stove? Ever ask the dreamer in your house to bring down a trunk from the attic?

Will you ever forget the almost human perversity with which that stove and that trunk resisted him; or how amusing it looked to see a grown man outwitted at every turn by an inert mass?

"I have carried on a life-long feud with inanimate things," a pure Cerebral friend remarked to us recently. "I have a fight on my hands every time I attempt to use a pair of scissors, a knife and fork, a hammer or a collar button."

His Jerky Walk

¶ Because he is short the Cerebral takes short steps. Because he lacks muscle he lacks a powerful stride. As a result he has a walk that is irregular and sometimes jerky.

When he walks slowly this jerk is not apparent, but when hurried it is quite noticeable.

Is Lost in Chairs

¶ The Cerebral gets lost in the same chair that is itself lost under the large, spreading Osseous; and for the same reason. Built for the average, chairs are as much too large for the Cerebral as they are too small for the big bony man. So the Cerebral's legs dangle and his arms don't reach.

Dislikes Social Life

¶ Though a most sympathetic friend, the Cerebral does not make many friends and does not care for many. He is too abstract to add to the gaiety of social gatherings, for these are based on the enjoyment of the concrete.

Enjoys the Intellectuals

¶ Readers, thinkers, writers—intellectuals like himself—are the kinds of people the Cerebral enjoys most.

Another reason why he has few friends is because these people, being in the great minority, are not easy to find.

Ignores the Ignorant

¶ People who let others do their thinking for them and those who are not aware of the great things going on in world movements, are not popular with this type. He sometimes has a secret contempt for them and ignores them as completely as they ignore him.

Avoids the Limelight

¶ Modesty and reserve, almost as marked in the men as in the women, characterize this extreme type. They do things of great moment sometimes—invent something or write something extraordinary—but even then they try to avoid being lionized.

They prefer the shadows rather than the spotlight. Thus they miss many of the good things less brainy and more aggressive people gain. But it does no good to explain this to a Cerebral. He enjoys retirement and is constantly missing opportunities because he refuses to "mix."

Cares Little for Money

¶ Friends mean something to the Cerebral, fame sometimes means much but money means little. In this he is the exact opposite of the Osseous, to whom the pecuniary advantages or disadvantages of a thing are always significant.

The pure Cerebral finds it difficult to interest himself in his finances. He seldom counts his change. He will go away from his room leaving every cent he owns lying on the dresser—and then forget to lock the door!

This type of person almost never asks for a raise. He is too busy dreaming dreams to plan what he will do in his old age. He prefers staying at the same job with congenial associates to finding another even if it paid more.

Very Often Poor

¶ Since we get only what we go after in this world, it follows that the Cerebral is often poor. To make money one must want money. Competition for it is so keen that only those who want it badly and work with efficiency ever get very much of it.

The Cerebral takes so little interest in money that he gets lost in the shuffle. Not until he wakes up some morning with the poorhouse staring him in the face does he give it serious consideration. And then he does not do much about it.

Almost Never Rich

¶ History shows that few people of the pure Cerebral type ever became rich. Even the most brilliant gave so much more thought to their mission than the practical ways and means that they were usually seriously handicapped for the funds necessary to its materialization.

Madame Curie, co-discoverer of radium, said to be the greatest living woman of this type, is world-famous and has done humanity a noble service. But her experiments were always carried on against great disadvantages because she had not the financial means to purchase more than the most limited quantities of the precious substance.

About Clothes

¶ Clothes are almost the last thing the Cerebral thinks about. As we have seen, all the other types have decided preferences as to their clothes—the Alimentive demands comfort, the Thoracic style, the Muscular durability and the Osseous sameness—but the extreme Cerebral type says "anything will do." So we often see him with a coat of one color, trousers of another and a hat of another, with no gloves at all and his tie missing.

Often Absent-Minded

¶ We have always said people were "absent-minded" when their minds were absent from what they were doing. This often applies to the Cerebral for he is capable of greater concentration than other types; also he is so frequently compelled to do things in which he has no interest that his mind naturally wanders to the things he cares about.

A Cerebral professor whom we know sometimes appeared before his Harvard classes in bedroom slippers. A Thoracic would not be likely to let his own brother catch him in his!

Writes Better than He Talks

¶ The poor talker sometimes surprises us by being a good writer. Such a one is usually of the Cerebral type.

He likes to think out every phase of a thing and put it into just the right words before giving it to the world. So, many a Cerebral who does little talking outside his intimate circle does a good deal of surreptitious writing. It may be only the keeping of a diary, jotting down memoranda or writing long letters to his friends, but he will write something. Some of the world's greatest ideas have come to light first in the forgotten manuscripts of people of this type who died without showing their writings to any one. Evidently they did not consider them of sufficient importance or did not care as much about publishing them as about putting them down.

An Inveterate Reader

¶ Step into the reference rooms of your city library on a summer's day and you will stand more chance of finding examples of this extreme type there than in any other spot.

You may have thought these extreme types are difficult to locate, since the average American is a combination. But it is easy to find any of them if you look in the right places.

In every case you will find them in the very places where a study of Human Analysis would tell you to look for them.

Where to Look for Pure Types

¶ When you wish to find some pure Alimentives, go to a restaurant that is famous for its rich foods. When you want to see several extreme Thoracics, drop into any vaudeville show and take your choice from the actors or from the audience. When you are looking for pure Musculars go to a boxing match or a prize fight and you will be surrounded by them. When looking for the Osseous attend a convention of expert accountants, bankers, lumbermen, hardware merchants or pioneers.

All these types appear in other places and in other vocations, but they are certain to be present in large numbers any day in any of the above-named places.

But when you are looking for this interesting little extreme thinker-type you must go to a library. We specify the reference room of the library because those who search for fiction, newspapers and magazines are not necessarily of the pure type. And we specify a day in summer rather than in winter so that you will be able to select your subjects from amongst people who are there in spite of the weather rather than because of it.

Interested in Everything

¶ "I never saw a book without wanting to read it," said a Cerebral friend to us the other day. This expresses the interest every person of this type has in the printed page. "I never see a library without wishing I had time to go there and stay till I had read everything in it."

The Book Worm

¶ So it is small wonder that such a one becomes known early in life as a "book worm." As a little child he takes readily to reading and won't take to much else. Because we all learn quickly what we like, he is soon devouring books for older heads. "Why won't he run and play like other children?" wails Mother, and "That boy ought to be made to join the ball team," scolds Father; but "that boy" continues to keep his nose in a book.

He can talk on almost any subject—when he will—and knows pretty well what is going on in the world at an age when other boys are oblivious to everything but gymnasiums and girls.

Old for His Years

¶ The "little old man" or "little old woman" of ten is always a Cerebral child. The Alimentives are the babies of the race and never entirely grow up no matter how many years they live. But the Cerebral is born old. From infancy he shows more maturity than other children.

The "Teacher's Pet"

¶ His studiousness and tractableness lead to one reward in childhood, though it often costs him dear as a man. He usually becomes the teacher's favorite and no wonder: he always has his lessons, he gives her little trouble and is about all that keeps many a teacher at her poorly paid post.

Little Sense of Time

¶ The extreme Cerebral often has a deficient sense of time. He is less conscious of the passage of the hours than any other type. The Muscular and the Osseous often have an almost uncanny time-sense, but the extreme Cerebral man often lacks it. Forgetting to wind his watch or to consult it for hours when he does, is a familiar habit of this type.

We know a bride in Detroit whose flat looked out on a bakery and a bookstore. She told us that she used to send her Cerebral hubby across the street