Sinful Love by Suki Shiroyuki (best books to read for self development txt) 📖

I lived in the word of le clair de lune a world of peace and tranquility. Here I lived with my family as  the royal princess of this land. We lived in this land isolated from the other worlds around us. My one and only friend that i  once entrusted my life to was none other the boy Charles who betrayed me and slayed my family without a shed of hesitation or guilt. His last word still echo in my mind, " We were never friends what you spent time with was none other than a puppet made from my deceased father, you are no longer the princess and I am no longer a mere orphan of the royal family. Dia its time for you to disppear from our world, I shall send you to earth and you shall live there for eternity." His voice so deep and cruel broke the young me who was only the age of 5. Broken and alone I was sent to earth, taken in by a kind couple who couldnt bear children. Theyt loved me and cared for me reminded me of warmth yet the darkness that was stirred from the murder of my loved ones lingered. Its been 10 years since i started living them. They never scold or abuse me they only smiled gently and huged me warmly without a shed of distrust or hate.They were genuiely kind deep within I wanted to protect them. I loved them as family, but i never imangined that Charles would actually lay a finger on the kind woman who took me in. He came to earth pierced her heart with a blade.He not only took her away but he took away the unborn child with her from her husband. He was kind to the very end to me but his kindness were like blades that stabbed at my heart, his gentle smile and sobs at mindnight crushed me.That day when  i returned i saw his body lying on the ground a blade that he was holding tightly to. He died leaving me but i dont resent her for i understand the pain that he felt i knew that this was bound to happen yet i wasnt able to stop this from happening. I moved out of the house shortly after moving into a villa that he brought for me in Florida. While i read his will the tears streamed down my cheeks non-stop,even after death they both continued to be kind to me. They didnt blame me and apologized to me i felt the guilt in my rise and the pain of losing them seep into my soul. AS i lived quietly in Florida i met new people as they were unique and different there was one man who attempted to understand me and know me.Lucas i felt my heart throb and race when he stand before me but i knew that Charles might attack him if i got close to him so i distance myself from him and the others yet they still stuck close to me saying that they's support me.I felt strongly towards  Lucas but i didnt want to involve them. They were important to me, they were my essence of life, my rays of hope. Yet the rays of hope one by one got into unfortunate accidetns although none life endangering they were all so cruel. Lucas suffered a fall from the 15th floor to the 1st floor. He went in to  a coma for 2 1/2 years finally wakingyp to have forgotten all about us. For the first time i learnt of his past his parents died in a car accident 12 1/2  years ago on the day that i appeared on earth. His parents were driving to see his competition but their car slammed into a pole while turning to avoid a certain child who had long silver hair and pale skin with tattered clothing.The child was me I  caused the death of Lucas's parents. His foster parents that never came to visit him once finally came  but instead of worrying about the incident they simply demanded that he quickly recover and pay the fees for the hospital. They were cruel and distasteful to be able to say such things to a injured person they were truly inhuman. When he questioned me of who i was i simply replied with a nod and a smile. I knew that i was unworthy of his love and i shouldnt be the one recieving this man's kindness.  I left him tears running down my cheeks. I transferred schools yet why is it that i we meet again in University. A deep scar across his his back, chest, arm,ribs and neck. He recognized me immediately but i had no desire to drag him into anymore suffering. Yet why is it that my heart aches in pain and iconstantly filled with happiness each time i see him. He remembers his past but i have no intention of allowing myself to iundulge in his kindness. Yet it is his very kindness that draws me closer to him, I tell him the truth that i was the one that caused the death of his parents yet he smiled and said it wasnt my fault. He accepted me and loved me .I allowed myself to drown in his kindness, love and warmth. Our love started steady and we soon became completely blind to the other in our world, we deisred a world that was meant only  for us but i knew that i was not the one that should be with him in that world. For my fate has yet to be decided after i take the life of Charles. I know i love Lucas but I also know that Charles occupies just as much of  my heart. The excruciating pain that felt remembering the time when Charles was still kind and warm yet the thought of him murdering my family burned those sweet times away to ashes.  The pained look on  Lucas face when he sees me reminicsing are like daggers digging deep into my heart. I knew i was hurting him yet i simnply could not forget him until i know the truth behind his purpose of murdering my parents. Lucas started to change little by little everything he became distant and colder by the days i knew this was because of me because i hurt him and not allow him to enter my heart. Do i really love Lucas? i do love him but im still unble to open up to him about my past that hurts just to remember. On the night of the full moon, Lucas called me but when dawn drew near the call came to a sudden end and the last words that came from him were revoir ma douce rose,  at that time i had no clue what he was talking about yet i felt as though he was goin to disappear and he really did. I was too late again to protect and notice that something was going to happen.

Publication Date: 03-09-2015

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