Stay with Me by Awesomekristii (jenna bush book club .TXT) 📖

C H A P T E R 51

DELILAH

“But where are you going?” This was the fifth time I think I asked Damien, but he refused to tell me anything.

 

“Some stuff, Lilah. I have to otherwise I won’t be leaving you.” He grabbed my shoulders and spoke, the same answer for the fifth time. Sighing I nodded and didn’t say anything else. If he hadn’t said anything by now, he wouldn’t be saying anything anymore.

 

It’s been more than three weeks since I started the therapy, and surprisingly I was feeling better. Yes, sometimes I get the nightmares again and wake up sweaty and terrified but being beside Damien it has gotten better.

 

“But do Steven need to be here? He must have work in his hospital.” He had asked Steven to stay with me for the day till he gets back, and it didn’t sit well with me knowing, that he was a doctor and he couldn’t waste his time here.

 

“Don’t worry. I had already asked him and he can take a leave for today. It’s just for like a few hours I don’t think it will be any problem for him.” I nodded biting my lips, I just didn’t want to cause them any more trouble than I had already done.

 

I saw him grabbing the coat and shrugging it over his muscular arms, as he settled his hair. I couldn’t stop myself from staring at him and the words of Samantha swirling in my brain from our last session.

 

“Did you ever tell him how you feel?”

 

“No.” I shook my head.

 

“And do you want him to know?” I didn’t answer her right away to that. I wasn’t sure if I wanted him to know how I felt. I didn’t want to sabotage the friendship we had formed even though he was more than just a friend to me.

 

“I… I’m scared if he didn’t feel the same and then it will strain our friendship too.” Samantha didn’t say anything for a while, writing down something on her pad.

 

“So you’re ok with him not knowing and losing your chance of ever finding your love and happiness?” I stopped at her words, my mind buzzed as they registered. “You must be ok then if he ever dates someone else.”

 

The mention of someone else being close to him, experiencing the same things, the same kisses and touches, pushed a knife through my heart, my stomach coiled and I felt a gallon of sadness pressing me down. I didn’t want that. 

 

“Can you sew this button, please?” I looked back at Damien looking uneasy as he stared at his broken button.

 

“Sure.” I walked towards the drawer and got the sew and the thread before returning. He stood before me, and I began to sew the button for him. He kept looking at his watch, and I understood he was getting late. Was it an office meeting?

 

I continued doing that, being so close to him I could smell his aftershave and the woody, spicy cologne making my legs go weak. I took in another whiff, almost wanting to close my eyes, it smells too good. I bit my lips to stop these absurd thoughts and was almost done with the sewing.

 

I could feel his scorching gaze strained on me, making me nervous. I fumbled a little with the button when I felt his fingers over my face brushing away the tiny hair from over my face. He was closer to me, so much so that I could easily feel his hot breath over my cheekbones.

 

“It’s done.” I didn’t know why I said that so low, even though there wasn’t anyone living in the house except us. He hummed but didn’t turn away before I felt his muscular arms going around my waist wrapping there and pulling me closer to him.

 

My breath hitched, and my stomach felt like damn chaos. My legs almost felt weaker than before when he began to be closer. I strained my eyes still on the sewed button, my heart thumping so loud.

 

“Beautiful.” He whispered so near, and I took in a shuddering breath, hearing his deep voice. I almost wanted to rise on my toes and seal our lips together and find myself in peace and solace.

 

His finger began to run over my cheekbones, before gliding down to my chin as he turned it up to face him. Looking at his eyes had always been one of my favorite things. There was a hidden galaxy in there, thousands of emotions underlying, and even though he didn’t show emotions much to the outside world, unlike most people he feel too deep, too passionate, and too intense.

 

His eyes lay bare like the cloudless night sky, and I could easily see those foreign emotions residing in there so deep as enough to consume my entire soul. His fingers reached up and run over my lower lips, pulling them out from between my teeth.

 

“You shouldn’t do that.” My knees buckled almost making me weak.

 

“I… I’m so-“

 

“Shh…” His finger pressed over my lips, cutting me off. Before I could say anything he removed them and came nearer almost brushing his lips over mine. “Don’t apologize.”

 

I nodded, not knowing how to react anymore. He had consumed me whole, and I was left not having any way anymore. “I can’t pretend anymore that I don’t feel anything for you.” My eyes visibly widened as I heard him.

 

He looked at me intensely, so raw and deep. His thumb brushed over my jaws and lips, “I don’t know what should I name it, but…” His expression turned to that of remorse, guilt, and sadness, “seeing you laying there on the hospital bed had made me realize, Lilah how precious you’re to me.”

 

I couldn’t form words, my throat had dried up as I heard him say. “I can never imagine an existence, a phase where you aren’t there with me. I didn’t know when, and how you began to be this special for me, but I don’t doubt that never happened since you’re such a kind soul, Lilah, innocent, and a fighter that I couldn’t stop myself from having these feelings for you.”

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