Onlyness by Santosh Jha (fb2 epub reader TXT) 📖

accepted as finality because, mechanism of mind consciousness in its entirety has not yet been fully understood and proven. However, we have reasonably plausible answers in parts. They at least explain to good extent what you asked about. They are part answers but together, they make up for a sustainable answer. We all need to accept answers about decision-making and choices of human consciousness in a very open and relative way. The first fact remains that all gratification actually begins with an instant and intense joy. The itch, when we start scratching, extends intense and instant joy. At the point of start, the joy part is tangible and overridingly present. The impending pain is intangible and latent, as the joy rules the senses. It is first nature of every living being is to accept and invite joy. There are so many good and joyous things in this world, which start with pain, and in them, the joy part is latent, which ultimately prevails in long run. However, people usually never accept their utility. Part of scientific community believes that it is the way our brain is designed and has evolved to work. Brain is, unlike other human organs, not a single organ but a cooperative of layers of it. Its working is very complex and probably has a randomized decision-making matrix. They however maintain that it is primarily reactive and does not register the time-space dimensions. This makes our subconscious usually decide for us and as it is good at reacting to five senses and assigns only instant utility as basis for value-summation, most of us have an innate consciousness to accept the first and immediate utility of an action or behavior, without assigning weight and utility to long-term consequences. This is something, which comes to us through conscious and continuous mind training. The conscious mind needs to be trained to come out of the instant action-reaction mode and short-term utility of it. Both science as well as philosophy believes that humans have the decisive advantage of having the faculty and facility of observance and imagination, to postpone an action-reaction decision-making of subconscious mind. Humans have evolved to this stage of modern wisdom only because of this facility.”

“Shiv, it seems so contradicting and conflicting. On the one hand, you say, we came this far in our march to civilization because we have the intelligence to imagine beyond the instant gratification and reactive instincts. Still, majority of us are so ignorant that we cannot see the latent trouble in most of our culturally labeled utilities and joys. I have heard how most living beings risk their dear lives and are even predated, just for the instinctive urge of mating. For mating, they do such activities, which make them vulnerable against predators. One can understand that they do it because they do not have the faculty of imagination to postpone or purge their instinctive action-reaction body urges. But even humans do it, most of them. They risk their lives for instant self-gratification. Why this contradiction Shiv?”

“There are so many answers Melissa, but unfortunately no single final answer as we still do not completely know how and why the mind consciousness of humans work the way they do. As I said, there are part answers still we can have a framework of explaining this contradictory behavior. The top scientists of today say a very interesting thing. They say, when races become too intelligent, they become extinct. This somehow explains the latent energy behind evolution of human consciousness. It is not that science is warning against human intelligence, their ingenuity and inventiveness now. More than 3000 years back, philosophy of human minds warned against this. The fact remains that for most people, it is first intelligence to react to their five senses as they give them the very intense and primary joys of consumptive satisfaction. This first intelligence has, over the years become adept, procrastinating the latent intelligence, which warns against it and reveals the painful side of it. Then, there are other socio-psychological reasons. We live in such a huge and diverse society that most of us are almost detached with others. In this village society, there are only 75 people and even in a short time of a week, you have almost known all of them and they come across you every day. In such small societies, it is very evident and visible to all, how wrong ultimately falls back on the wrongdoer, even when in short-run, it may seem to bring joys. Therefore, people can see and the truth is self-evident. However, in our huge and modern contemporary society, we never know what happens even to our immediate neighbor. At best, we can know about neighbor’s joys but never their pains. Our intelligence of maximizing joys and minimizing pains has made us confined to individual joys and pains. This somehow blinds us of what ills and troubles this modern culture of over instant-self-gratification is engendering. People all over the world know about your success, name and fame. They knew what you attained and how you were felicitated for your attainments. However, nobody wants to know what pains and troubles you went through because of the same attainments. There is this intelligence of average people, which urges them to label a subjective blame to other’s pains. They would always say, he died of liver disease because he boozed too much. I take just a few drinks and I am very careful about my diet. There is a tendency to make others failure subjective so that we could dissociate ourselves with it. However, the same intelligence wishes to make all successes as objective so that it could be associated with all. So, it is their intelligence, not ignorance, which makes Melissa’s success as something anybody could have but her failure as something she created for herself. There are so many independent explanations of how we all behave and how things are what they are now. All answers however emanate out of the mechanism of human consciousness, which we are still not able to understand perfectly. This in turn allows the free flight of fanciful advocacy for our subjective intelligence and inventiveness.”

“Shiv, now I understand why you always insist on me putting my innocence and honesty to the front of my consciousness. I understand why the tree of human intelligence should always be solidly rooted in the soil of innocent honesty. You know Shiv, I always was an innocent empress my dad made me to be. However, as I grew in the milieu, where everyone was in a race for intelligence, I thought, it is ideal for an empress to be way ahead of the people in intelligence. I strived for it and made my mark. I think, somewhere, I lost my royal innocence and crown of stupid honesty. That is why I faced the troubles like a silly girl.”

“Melissa, you did not lose your innocence. It was just pushed to disuse. Your father wished you to be like an empress to keep away and aloof from the populism of generic intelligence, which has come to stay as the cornerstone of all popular societal benchmarks of modern society. For a while, you dabbled into this populism and that too with great success. You still are the innocent empress, your father nurtured with so much care and affection. If not, you would not have been here and journeying the road to a destination, you have almost arrived at.”

“No Shiv, I feel, I have taken a small first step on the road. But I wish to travel the whole distance and I know, you shall take me to the destination. Shiv, I am so happy and can I be a bit proud that very initially, I asked you the right questions and it is all the more valid now. You remember, I had asked you in the Rishikesh ashram to tell me, how to be in a super consciousness, which enables the self to decide the matrix of all decision-making of action-behavior, independent of the innate instincts and subconscious mind. How you attained this facility of being the conscious decider of what should ideally present yourself with your decision-matrix at any point of time in your life. You see Shiv, I am so good at keeping the questions alive, which you asked me to do.”

“Melissa, you are not just good, you are brilliant, a true genius. Always remain with your genius of innocent honesty and simplicity. An empress is special because of that. You are very special.”

“Thank you so much. Now you answer my question.”

“Not now dear empress. It is already too late. We shall talk about this tomorrow morning when we shall go to jungle and sit near the waterfall. That shall be the ideal backdrop as the answer involves discussion about nature.”

Shiv goes out to arrange for dinner. She feels his warmth in her hand. All of a sudden, she looks for a mirror in the room. She wants to see herself. She smiles at the thought that ever since she came here, she never looked at a mirror. There was none anyway. Melissa remembers, she was so conscious of her looks and image. She thinks, she did not actually look at herself in the mirror but at someone, who was a movie star and she checked it quite often to ensure that she looked like the way people had her image of. Now that she believes, she is one, deep inside her consciousness, who roams around in the wild nature unconcerned and free. She is one who enjoys her simple and honest talks with Shiv. She is one who now trusts, her consciousness is what makes her beautiful as Shiv always says, she beautiful because she is innocent and simple. She wonders, whether Shiv finds her beautiful in other ways too. She is not concerned, just curious. She knows deep inside, Shiv sees her as an empress and all empresses are beautiful. She has no doubts over Shiv’s words that she is brilliant. She does not wish to ask him anymore. She is confident, Shiv is caring her so much and pampering her in unimaginable ways not because her dad probably helped the ashram or Acharya in a big way. He is doing it because he likes her and appreciates her innocence, honesty and simplicity. She believes, these are the diamonds Shiv said she had in her and she just needed to dig them out. She decides to wear her diamonds always as Shiv liked them and liked her for that.

**

CHAPTER 10

The consciousness is a stupid engineering; its mechanism is so intricate and mystically multidimensional that it keeps people in constant state of flux; engendering layers of realisms, not amenable for linear understanding of individuals. The elements of milieus outside body-mind mechanisms keep interacting with disposition of consciousness within. This action-reaction cyclicality engenders, which mind stores as intangible experiences and memories in the subconscious. The totality and wholeness of it is a person’s culture, which sets the boundaries of his thought-action-behavior domain. As the milieus change in the course of life’s randomized journeys, the patterns of its interactions with disposition alter synchronically. This energizes the incessant cyclicality of learning and unlearning, which keeps an individual’s overall culture of consciousness in continuous flux. This flux has the energy of creation and destruction, making and unmaking going in an intertwined way.

In the last ten days, so much has changed drastically in Melissa’s outer milieus. Her inner disposition has also undergone the altered states of consciousnesses. Her culture of consciousness is in a state of continuous and intense flux. The learning she is undergoing has cyclically energized a very emphatic process of unlearning. The empress in flux, is in the unsettled domain of making and unmaking. It is only very natural for Melissa that she has unconsciously picked up one common thread in all these processes and stick to it for her poise and wellness. It is Shiv, which is the common