Forbidden Desire by Ritesh Prasad (best books to read ever TXT) 📖

Grandfather was nice and humble person and to him family was more important than anything else. Contrary to that my Dad was egoistic and carefree person being the only child he was over-showered with love and affection since his birth which made him a spoilt brat. Even after marriage and having four kids he was least bothered about what was happening in business and never thought of supporting his father in business, he was totally dependent on this Dad for finance. But after my Grandfather’s sudden demise in the year 1987 all the responsibilities were vested on my Dad both for family as well as for business.

 

He was not as efficient as his Dad and did not inherit business acumen like his father. During late 80’s when we were small kids, Dad challenged the Company with whom we had being doing business since decades in the Court for fraud practices. After that all his attention and time was diverted to court case and never gave heed to business or family. Our business remained closed for months due to his court hearings and as a result within couple of months the business started running into losses. This according to my Mom was the stepping stone of our debacle. He never listened to anyone nor did care for his business that was running into losses. For him his ego and vainglory was more important and this led to conflict between my Mom and Dad. I don’t want to get into debate that who was right and who was wrong but one thing that surely did happened was we as a family were ruined completely because of this. Finally after 12 years of long court proceedings and hearings the High Court verdict came and as predicted we lost the case and with this we lost everything; entire money, ancestor property and all we had and by this time we were heavily debt ridden.

 

My elder brother who was 19 at that time quit his studies and went against my Dad decision and took charge of the business which was almost bankrupt. He became our savior which gave us some hope. He supported me to continue my studies. What I am today is because of him and I whole heartily thank him for that. By the time i was in final year of graduation the differences between my Dad and him rose to its extreme and became uncontrollable. There was regular conflict between father and son and soon our house turned into a battle field. I was determined no matter what happens I will complete my graduation at any cost. Thereafter I will leave this place and look for jobs so that I could support my family. So I continued my studies in this disturb environment. I felt very bad about my Mom who had the suffered the most of his Hitler regime. I always wish ever since childhood if somehow I could escape her from this misery.

 

I still remember vividly when I was around 8 years; I had gone to market with my Dad and there in the shop I saw a wrist watch embedded with green light, it was very popular among kids in my school during those days and hardly cost around 20 bucks. Dad was purchasing some groceries in the other shop and I was gazing at the watch desperately. The shopkeeper asked “You like it?” I said “Yes” and looked back at Dad who was still busy in buying, but was so scared to tell him I need that wristwatch. I tried to resist my temptation but couldn’t, so I finally courage and went up to him and requested him to buy it for me. First time he said “No” in straight tone.

I beg pleaseeeeee Dad all my friends in school have this and it cost only Rs.20 may be we can bargain and seller might charge a little less…Please please please Dad…. There was a loud “Nooooooooohhhh” everybody around us turned to see what had happened. By this time I became obstinate and overlook his anger and kept on pleading. Thassssssh!!!!!! came the slap on my face, it was so hard that my face got swollen. He pulled me still I didn’t move an inch from the shop and then in anger he snatched me along with my hair and bashed badly then and there. The people there in the market were confused why he was beating me so badly even some people tried to stop him but could not succeed and my thrashing continued from market till I reached home. I was so upset that I didn’t have any food the entire day. There are so many memories from childhood like that, when I recall those it makes me sad. We all siblings had experience a very bad childhood without any love and affection from family forget about proper clothes, chocolates and toys, it was like a fantasy for us. We were so scared of our Dad during childhood that once he entered home we stopped uttering a word forget about laughing or making noise of any kind. My Mom also spoke to him only when it was necessary. It’s very hard to explain in words what we have gone through….

 

My elder brother is now married for 6 years and is blessed with a beautiful daughter. My Niece “Peehu” the name was given by me. She is 4 years old and is darling of everyone. Since I stay away from her I had missed most of her golden childhood days. She is very fond of me and whenever I go home I spend most of the times playing with her that reminds me of my own childhood. But we all try to give her the best we can, I never forget to get new dresses, her favorite chocolates and toys whenever I visited home. It gives me immense pleasure when I see her happy face after receiving all those things. I have never ever shouted at her forget about slapping.

 

Our family never had an affectionate environment and that’s why I starved for this more and more. And when Sakshi came in life the hunt was complete. She is the person with whom I love being a small child doing silly things. Whenever she gets upset with me I start pretending like a child and believe me it has worked all the times. It is said that no matter how mature and independent we become still there is child a within all of us and it opens only in front of that person with whom we are most comfortable and in my case it was Sakshi…. “The lucky mascot of my life”

 

Though life kept on moving but her Dad’s sudden change in behavior had a bad impact in our relationship as well, now she didn’t call me so often during days and we mostly used to update each other through SMS. We hardly got time to meet each. As Sunday was the only day we had time for each other otherwise we would be busy in our own space. I avoided visiting her house after that incident.

 

 

One evening around 7:00 pm when I was just about to leave office for the day, I got call from Sakshi that her Dad is very serious and has admitted to ICU. She asked me to come as quickly as possible. I assured her I will be there soon and disconnected the call. I hurried and got into a taxi and went straight to hospital. All her family members and relatives were there. I console her Mom who was crying profusely. No matter how bad his act may be still he was the father of her children and her husband. I saw Sanjeev and Kaushik entering the gate, I asked Sakshi to take her Mom and Raju home since it was already late. I assured Aunty if there is any urgency I will inform her and we three stayed in the lobby for the entire night.

 

If a member in family is suffering it affects the entire family this was clearly seen in everyone’s face. Doctors said that his liver was fully damaged because of excessive alcohol and they are trying their best to save him. I used to occasionally visit hospital and her home whenever I got time. Two weeks past still there was no improvement. One Sunday morning I was still in bed got a beep in my mobile… I checked, it was a SMS from Sakshi that she will be coming to my flat in the afternoon.

 

Around 1:00 pm she entered my house I was in the kitchen preparing lunch for both of us. She looked at me and went straight into the room. I took a glass and poured some orange juice from the refrigerator and went inside. I handed her the glass which she kept aside and remain silent again.

 

“Don’t feel sad babbyy,” I know its tough time but I am sure your Dad will be fine.

 

“Will he??? Really…” she said facing me with those moisten eyes.

 

“Hey Hey Jaan…please don’t cry … I told you….. He will be fine and would be back home by next week.” But she started crying profusely. I hugged her tight and tried to console her.

 

“This all happened because of me and I am the one who should be blamed. I am not a nice daughter. She said and started crying again.”

 

“Why are you talking like that? It’s just a bad phase which will be over soon.”

 

“No!!!! The evening he was admitted to hospital … I had a very bad fight with him in the morning before going to college. What could I do I was helpless I had to intervene otherwise he would had killed my Mom.”

 

“What??? Tell me in details what exactly had happened that day.” I said being more attentive about her narration.

 

 

“For the past few months he has been staying in home and boozes all the time and then picks up fight with Mom or me over small issues. He starts drinking since morning once he gets up. That day I was getting ready for college in my room. I heard screaming of my Mom and ran to her room immediately, I saw Dad was totally drunk and was holding Mom by her hair and shouting. I rushed and pushed him back. Since he was so drunk he dis-balanced and fell on the floor. My Mom was breathing heavily I calmed her down and asked her to sit on the bed.”

 

“Ohhhh… it was terrible that happened. But why was he behaving like this.” I said.

 

“He has been like that right after one year of his marriage. It was that I never disclose about his habits to you before.” She said in low tone and continued further,

“Slowly his drinking habit increased and was warned by his office authorities many times to give up his drinking habit and abusive behavior otherwise they had no option but to fire him from his job. For some years there was improvement and his drinking habit reduced but never stopped.”

 

“Okay… might be something was disturbing him badly. So he got into this drinking habit.” I paused for a while and said.

 

“We don’t know why he used to act like this as he never shared his grievances with us. You have seen him; he always keeps quiet and is confined to his own. He only talks much with Raju. For him he is only his child and I and Mom are nothing.”

 

“No that can’t be the case.” I said handing her the glass. She took two sips and put back glass on the table and continued again.

 

“Yes it is!!! I can’t reveal to you what he says to me and Mom…it’s really disgusting. How can anyone’s father be so inhumane like him? She said and started weeping again.

 

“I really don’t know, but yes some people are like that by nature.” I said in reflexes when I heard her last word “inhumane”. Because I had experienced the