Lonely Bride by Shikha A (electronic reader .TXT) 📖

ch-12

 

SARAH POV

 

I don’t want to go to my house right now, I need to be alone.

I message Sam I won’t be back tonight so don’t worry I will be home tomorrow morning.

They both know sometimes I just won't be alone and I have my hidden place which no one knows. 

Yes, I am secretive and I like to be like that. I don’t like to share and everything with everyone. Few things are too personal I guess.

I told the driver the address and he looks at me weirdly but dude you going to get your money so drive the car and do not look at me. I thought.

In 45 mint of the drive, we reached far away from the city and he stopped the car in front of a small house surrounded by forest and there is not even a single house other than this. It’s a very quiet place.

I paid to driver more than the ride amount and saw a pleased look on his face.

Nodding towards him I went inside my small house. 

I enter the gate and welcome by a small garden. I open the door, my small living room open kitchen and one bedroom. Just like the house, I stayed for almost a year.

I kept my bag on my side and sat on the couch.

Yes, I miss that house and that’s the reason I made this house just like the way it was there. I try to keep all the colors and décor also the same. Somehow it gives me a homily feeling.

Home?

I started laughing at this thought like manic.

Which home Sarah? 

The one which your husband said it’s his house and you have to stay there the way he wanted? My mind mocked.

That house was never mine.

He was never there.

Let’s not forget the time when you stayed up the whole night looking for the celling.

Let’s not forget you never switch off your light due to scared of darkness.

Let’s not forget the time when u did not utter a single word for weeks because there was no one to talk to you.

Let’s not forget no one came when you were burning in fever to take care of you.

Let’s not forget eating alone, sitting alone, sleeping alone do everything alone.

Tears are continuously flowing from my eyes thinking about my past. 

A painful past.

Why god why I am alone? 

Why I don’t have anyone who I can love. 

Why I don’t have anyone who loves me? 

Am I that bad?

When this will get over? 

Why can’t you call me mama? 

I want to come to you. Tell me mama tell me.

I don’t want to live anymore please call me mama, please.

I cry as loud as I can. I know no one will hear me here.

Today at age of 24 I finally left all the hope.

Hope to live.

Hope to become someone and make myself proud.

Hope to be loved.

Sean’s entry broke all my strength to the core.

Today his touch awakens the desire I have buried somewhere deep inside my heart.

Today I felt how unwanted I was. 

How unwanted I am.

I still remember the hatred in his eyes he had on our wedding day.

Today’s meeting made me feel cheap.

Made me feel someone, whom no one desires in their life. 

Today I felt I am cursed.

I am tired finally.

I can’t fight anymore to live.

I cried and cried for I don’t know how long.

I got up and went to my room and change my clothes and sat on the bed with my phone in hand.

 

Dear Best friends, 

You both came into my life like the first ray of the sun. 

I have never told you but you both have a special place in my heart and always will be. 

I just wanted to say I Love You both from bottom of my heart.

You both are the only ones I had and have in my life.

Thank you so much for being there with me always.

Always shine like a star.

 

Love,

Sarah

 

I kept my phone aside and look the stuff I had in my hand.

I smile looking at that, “Finally I am coming mama”

And I closed my eyes.

***

 

I woke up hearing the beeping sound. I open my eyes and closed my back due to too much light and kept my hand on my eyes and felt pain in my hand.

I slowly again try to open my eyes and look at my hand which was painting like a bitch and it was connected with so many wires. 

Wow, so heaven also has these? 

I look around and saw a white room and light blue curtains and 

few machines were beeping nearby me. 

It looks like some hospital, so haven has hospitals as well?

I was looking at everything and trying to register each and everything nearby me and looking to get a glimpse of my mama or my grandparents but I can’t see them.

Where are they? I thought.

Suddenly I heard the unlocked sound and look towards the sound came and saw the person I was not expecting in heaven.

 

MY DAD

 

What he is doing here? As much as I remember he was fit and fine till a few days back?

I was looking at him without bilking my eyes, and he was looking at me with whole hatred in his eyes.

Well, I don’t expect anything else from you dad than the hatred. I thought

He came towards me and sat near my bed, if looks could kill I would be six feet under by now.

How are you feeling he asked me with his topmost disgust?

I was looking at him and still trying to understand what is happening here.

 

I heard you are not well so thought to see, by when you will die.

Hearing this I got a tear in my eyes and I got a lump in my throat but again I did not say anything.

If you tried hard you could’ve succeeded but as usual, you are useless can’t do anything properly.

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