Rosalina's Hope by D.D. Dass (best non fiction books to read txt) 📖

pushed my canines back.

 

“Insult her again and will not hesitate to hurt you,” I warned through clenched teeth, “And get this through your brain, God knows there’s enough room to spare, we are nothing.  You are a brainless tawpie and it will do you good to leave the room before I remove you myself.  Let this be the last warning, if anything less than admissible compliments come from your mouth…” I didn’t care that the whole class was looking as I directed my black eyes to a wide eyed Hailey, “I will kill you.” 

 

I rose then, brushing past them all, ignoring my teachers shouts to return to class and walking into the boy’s restroom.  My eyes were completely black but I had expected nothing less.

 

I was damned tired of this school. Damned tired of following alpha orders. School was pointless for us, we never got to use our knowledge, expected to stay within the pack for the seven hundred years we lived.

 

Fucking ridiculous.

Washing my face, I blinked away the excess water, watching as my eyes flickered between hazel and black. It served as a reminder to who I was –who stared back at me in the mirror. I could recognize the dark, inky hair, the hazel eyes, the slight tan of my skin and the build of my body.

 

I was him and I was hideous. The image assaulted me and I tried to pull away, but it was too late. I was back with my father again, a youngling at twelve.

 

“Maman,” the word was nearly inaudible, though Maman glanced up, pale eyes tired and remorseful. Her hands never stopped their quick paced stitching. “Aimee is asleep.”

 

“Come,” she ordered in our tongue and wordlessly, I obeyed, trudging forward and sitting in front of her, watching the fireplaces high flames. It was strangely…painful to watch.

 

Maman began to caress my hair, her hands loving as she combed through it with her fingers. I smiled a little, unclenching my hands, soothed by the only compassion I had ever known.

 

“I love you hair,” she murmured and I flinched away from the words because it wasn’t my hair…it was his.

 

“For what reason? ‘Tis the very same as his,” I dared to breathe, my eyes never leaving the sire, even when her hands paused.

 

“Untrue.” The lie was still evident.

 

“Verily, Maman,” I turned to her. “What do you see when you look unto me?”

 

“Masculine beauty, my son, you shall be the most sought after Lycan in all of France,” she cooed, cupping my cheeks as they heated. How sad the actual truth is, I thought.

 

“How?” I demanded, a vicious anger –one I had never before felt–entering my blood stream. “How can you be so sure that I shan’t become his mirroring image?!” I did not close my eyes; they bored into my mother’s now dark ones. Mother Lycans were not only aggressive with their pups, but protective and the mixture was often dangerous to their pups.

 

And despite my sudden anger, the hit still stung. Blood flooded my mouth as I bite down on my tongue, holding back a wince as my teeth pierced the flesh.

 

“Say no such thing! You are unlike him. Unlike!” She sounded so sure, and I so badly wanted to believe her, to honor her faith.

 

But just then, he barged through the front doors, running the only love I had ever been allowed. His dark hair was greasy, his cravat missing and in his hand: a bottle of whiskey.

 

The distance did nothing to shade the stench of sweat and alcohol.

 

“SEBASTIEN!”

 

I smiled miserably to Maman, who went to stand, to defend me. It never worked; instead, it always ended with her bleeding. By now, I was used to the beatings, expected them.

 

Discreetly, she squeezed my hand as I approached the male. His dull, hazel eyes regarded me with disgust and I anticipated his move before he made it.

 

I braced myself for the blow. He didn’t disappoint –the Whiskey glass shattered over my temple and I collapsed along with the shards of glass, unable to fell the strays pierce the skin. Still skinny, I was at least able to keep hold of one form.

 

“Rise son.” When I made no move, Father’s voice rose to a shout. “RISE!” Aimee, the pup was still of little age, I did not want him to wake her so late. So, I forced myself to my feet, seeing double figures as the walls spun. Good God, there were two of him now. At the sight, bile rose in my throat but I kept the acid down, reminded of the more severe punishment were I to release such waste upon him.

 

“Roll up your trousers.” Never hesitating, even in my confusion, I did as ordered. For Aimee and Maman, I thought deliberately. For my family, I would do anything.

 

“Kneel.” On command, I began to kneel, but Maman grasped my forearm suddenly. Startled, I looked up.

 

Non! “All is well, Maman. See to Aimee.”

 

“Hush,” she murmured, hiding me behind her. She never looked to me, her gaze focused on my father who was centered on her as well. From behind her leg, I shivered, feeling…like…a child. Desperate to keep my mother safe from the monster, but so, so tired of hurting…

 

“Simon, you will leave him.”

Father growled, the sound shaking me though Maman was undeterred. How strong she could be.

 

“Bite your tongue, whore! I am his sire therefore I shall do as I see fit and you will submit to your Alpha.” My mother growled.

 

“Return to your bedchamber, Sebastien.”

 

“Remain,” the Alpha barked and I closed my eyes, my gut twisting as the little hope that had spurred, died. Unthinkingly, I knelt, whimpering as the glass cut through my skin.

 

Father gestured to me with a cruel smile. “Take the example from your pest, for one day, it will be his last.”

 

Some snapped inside me. The cords that held me too the universe…snapped and the wolf roared to life, took control. Insanity tugged at me; I lunged.

 

The bell rang then, loud and clear, yanking me from the memory as I flattened my palm on the glass. Breathing heavy, I exited the bathroom, plowing through the hallway until I reached her classroom. Just as she emerged from the class alongside Isaac.

 

The boy smiled bleakly, glancing quickly to Rosa, who remained silent, fueling my discomfort.

 

“I’ll catch you later, Rosa…Bastien,” he mumbled, brushing passed us with his head down before I could respond.

 

For the first time Rosa met my gaze, blue eyes swimming with questions. I sighed, linking our hands and guiding her through the throng. She didn’t object–in fact, she said nothing, even when students began to stare and the tardy bell rung. In seconds, we’d made it too the copy room door. Fishing the keys from my pocket, I unlocked the door and lightly pushed her inside.

 

She nearly tumbled over, but before she could, I caught her, making sure she was balanced. Then, I locked the door behind me, releasing her in the same movement.

 

I leaned against the door, waiting for her to start as I shoved a hand through my hair. Rosa stared at me –my hand–as if she’d seen a ghost. The rusty gears in my head clicked.

 

She’d seen the mating marks. Fuck me.

 

“So, you’ve seen them?” Somehow, her face managed to become paler and I fought the impulse to make sure she wasn’t about to freak.

 

“I-I don’t understand…” she murmured absently. “M-Marks don’t just…we didn’t just…What is going on?” My insides churned weirdly, both in fear and expectancy; I wanted to see my mark on her skin.

 

“It’s a long story?” I tried. “Can I see?”

 

After a short pause, she shook her head, but yanked her shirt up nonetheless. I blinked.

 

‘What the fuck?’ the wolf snarled, muted under the sudden ringing of my ears. For what seemed like a long time, I stared, trying to make sense of it. The markings on her smooth skin were the same yet different: a trio. One being my own, but the other two…completely wrong.

 

Something inside my chest crumpled and I squeezed my eyes shut, in attempt to shut out the yells of my father, the wolf’s snarls…just trying to feel my own emotions. Cheated, I thought numbly, I felt cheated and lost, so much like the child I had never been.

 

She wasn’t…mine. She didn’t belong to me…Not entirely.

 

The swirls in my marks were in the formation of my dominant power; the others were symbols of the Law, which I could only conclude was their own power. I hadn’t realized I was on my knees until I felt those warm arms snake themselves around my shoulders, the intoxicating scent of lavender invading my mind. Still, I was unseeing. All I could see–think was the marks.

 

The marks that proved another males cost, and love and need. Worse the knowledge that she could feel those emotions for the others as well.

 

My eyes flickered open, unfocused and hazy, without whites as the pain burned through my blood.

 

“Sebastien,” her voice was soft, unsure. I tensed further. She was unsure of me, my love. Unsure. I willed myself to look at her, willed myself to see beyond the pain.

 

My vision blurry, I claimed her lips in a desperate frenzy. My hands kept away from her side but instead tangled in her hair. My eyes fell shut as I tasted her lips, lightly nipping the swollen flesh. Mine.

 

She sighed in surrender, hand hands on either side of my throat as our tongues tangled in a dizzying, rhythmic dance. I groaned low in my throat when she pulled away, planning soft, open-mouthed kisses over my jaw lightly.

 

“Roza.” I watched her eyes flutter open, she gasped, cupping my cheeks as I forced myself to look into those eyes. My black eyes must have been detached of emotion, the eyes of an Alpha. Emotions were always kept to the Wolf.

 

Just as they were now. The sorrow, rage, self-loathing…covered by the depthless black of my eyes.

 

“Please, Sebastien,” she begged. “Talk to me.” Instantly, I wanted to give her whatever she pleased, anything, but I needed to think. I needed to be confident of myself again.

 

It’d been far too long since I’d been pushed to such weakness. Six years.

 

“Later,” I promised, hugging her to me, aware that it might be the last time I was allowed to hold her.

 

It was quiet, until the bell rang and ruined the moment.

 

She jumped and I realized we’d been in the room for over an hour now, not that I could say I missed French or that damned she-wolf who taught it. We exited the room when the halls emptied again; I walked her to her lunch table. Rosa sat silently, beside Isaac, who looked at me with accusation in his eyes. I simply shrugged, unfazed. There was no conversation as we sat awkwardly, Rosa toying with her fingers, Isaac tapping his own while I sat completely still.

 

Christ.

 

Just when I thought I might break the bell rang and I sighed; saved by the bell, how cliché. I walked Rosa to her next class, squeezing her hand and walking out to the parking lot, where I sat, blasting unfamiliar rap music because the stress of the moment was rolling off me in waves.

 

I contemplated the situation, filling myself with unwanted feelings all the while. Never being an emotional guy, it was difficult to feel so much at one point. There were two options, but the Wolf in me urged me to bite her.

 

I winched, wishing I wasn’t so damned inexperienced with female emotions; would she want me to bite her? Did I really want to bite her? I listed the pros and cons:

Pros: extended life span, gifts, protection, heightened senses…possible immortality. Cons: uncontrollable emotions, blood cravings, pups…

 

I snorted at the last con. I didn’t know how anyone would feel about the possibility of having lycanthrope pups instead of babies, or the fact that we usually came