The Maid by Athene Minerva (the reading list book .txt) 📖

the person she holds dear to her heart .. Someone she fell in love with at first sight .. She's been trying to hide her sexuality for years now , she even brought home former boyfriends to meet her parents , to prove to them that she is not what they have always suspected her to be - A Lesbian .

Sarah always knew that she was different .. When girls her age were talking about boys , she'd always daydream about kissing the girl she had a crush on at that time . She never wanted to admit it to herself , she didn't even want to come out to herself but it all changed when Leyla came into her life . Sarah fell for her  instantly , which confused her a lot . All her life she surpressed who she is and she denied to herself ever having romantic feelings towards girls . It all changed when she laid eyes on Leyla . She couldn't hide her feelings anymore , which lead to her acting up . It's the core reason why she treated Leyla like trash , she was scared that her mother might find out , her father couldn't care less . That one night where she gathered all of her courage and made pure and innocent love to the woman she truely loves , she was caught in the middle of the act . She was given the feeling like she murdered someone and is being punished for that , when all she did was come to terms with herself and act on her feelings .

The same day Sarah and Leyla met , the teen immetiatly looked up ' What does it mean when a girl likes a girl' . She wasn't born yesterday , she obviously knows what a lesbian is but she was denying her true self and looked for a reason to keep denying it . She was secretly hoping that she wouldn't get any results once she typed in that question in Google so she can lie to herself saying : ' I convinced myself that I like girls because I don't know how to flirt with boys' but deep down she knew that this wasn't the explaination of why she was feeling the way she is feeling about girls. Her heart was telling her that she has romantic feelings for girls and it was confirmed once she pressed enter  and she got an overwhelming amount of results . The first one is an article from the teen-magazine 'Teen Vogue'  , titled 'What It Means If You're a Girl Who Likes a Girl' . Once she started reading this article , she felt at ease with herself . Her brain and her heart allinged , she finally knew how to label the way she is feeling towards girls - she's a lesbian and she's proud .  The seconds of joy and pride came to an end when she remembered how her mom feels about the LGBTQ community . Saying that her mother hates them is an uderstatement , this woman despises them and wishes them nothing but the worst .

Sarah got frightened so she had to figure out how to surpress her romantic feelings towards women , but it's a lot harder than it seems . Before she knew who she was , she didn't find it  hard to deny her true self to herself . Now that she knows who she is , it's difficult to hide that ... Her mom got suspicious the day she was introduced to Leyla . Her mother noticed how she looked the maid in the eyes while blushing and told her to stop it . When Sarah heard that , she felt ashamed of herself . Her heart and her body were telling her to take Leyla on a date and get to know her better but she had to suppress  all of that when her mom told her to stop giving Leyla those looks .

After not recieving an answer from her mother , who is still giving her the silent-treatment , she chose to go to her room and to write letters to Leyla , which she will leave at her door later in the evening . She put her headphones on and started listening songs of the one and only Hayley Kiyoko . She figured out how she can help Leyla get out of the room and how they can live happily together , showing public affection to one another and not care about what people thought .

 

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H.O.P.E

At some point in time Leyla gave up on banging on the door and figured a way to escape .. She tried to climb out of the window but when she figured that it's locked , she took a random object and smashed the window and climbed out . As she walked by Sarah's window , she noticed that she was writing something like a letter or a diary entry . Leyla wanted to knock on her window , grab her by the hand and just run and be free but she couldn't ... She couldn't do that because she is holding herself back , she is doubting herself but she truly adores Sarah ...

Leyla was planning on running away from this house and never ever look back but the sight of Sarah just made something click in her . She couldn't move and therefore stood frozen and kept looking at Sarah , who's writing something adressed to the one and only Leyla .. After a minute or so the 17-year-old noticed someone staring at her and she approached the window to get a clearer picture , since it's dark outside . She recognised Leyla , opened the window immediatly and handed her the long letter . In this letter she adresses her feelings to Leyla and lets her know that she is sick and tired of the way her mother treats them , just because they are in love .

At the end of the letter Sarah writes : ' I have a plan in mind , which allows us to express our love publicly without being shamed for it or feel guilty . Here it goes : We are already past the regular way of coming out , the one where you sit down with whoever you are coming out to and you just tell them who you identify as . My mom already knows that we have romantic feelings for each other , so here is the other way of coming out , we embrace our love and don't care if she accepts us or not . I know lots of people who didn't come out to their parents or whatever in the 'regular' way , they introduced their partner to their family / friends and based on their reactions , they knew who to not invite to their LGBTQ+ wedding . It's a kind of 'in your face' type of coming out , but at least they don't have to beg for acceptence , like it can happen if you come out in the regular way , to non-accepting people . I mean , if you think about it , when you come out to your mom or whatever in the 'regular' way , you're kind of begging her to accept you but as your mother , that's her job anyway . So I think , just showing up with your significant other at your parents door and tell them then and there who you are attracted to , should do the job . If your parents truly love you as they claim they do , they won't be bothered by that , because you are their child and they love you unconditionally . If you happen to have parents who planned your entire future on the day you were born , ranging from what job you'll have to have to who you'll marry ( they just assume that you are straight and that you will eventually marry someone of the opposite gender) , they are abusive and you are better off without them and you shouldn't feel any negative emotion towards them - they failed you as a parent anyway . What do you think Leyla ? Do you want to give this a try ? '

Leyla cried while reading this letter , both tears of joy but also tears of sadness .

 

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Putting it into practice

 

Leyla couldn't stop crying but managed to say :' Hell yeah !! Let's do this !! '  , grabbed Sarah by the hand and they took off .

 

 Twitter: Athene_Minerva_

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Publication Date: 02-12-2019

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