Redeeming Love by Shikha Mishra (e book reader android txt) 📖

Disha's POV

I fall on my knees as soon as the door closes behind him. 

“Ahhhhhhh." A sob escapes my lips. Pain shoots through my heart. My heart clenches in pain. Suddenly everything becomes dark around me as I drown in complete darkness. I get surrounded by complete darkness. A darkness which I am afraid I will never be able to come out from. I can't see anything in this darkness except Vihaan's broken face. 

If that will make you happy, I will.

I did it. I freed him. I freed myself. I freed us from this love. The love which destroyed so many relationships. The love which gave us so much pain. 

I am sorry. I wish I could have stopped myself from doing that and everything could have been fine. But I am happy I got to live a few hours like a parent and experience it with you. Being a father with you as a mother is really a beautiful life."

Finally he understood what wrong he did.

A smile escapes my lips. 

But vihaan you are late. We can't go back. We can't be together. If we end up together, this love will again destroy us. Not only your, mine love is also toxic for you. We are both toxic for each other.

“Ahhhhhh……. Please stop this pain…..please…. somebody help me." My breathing becomes shallow. It becomes hard to breathe in the air.

My eyes fall on the pills kept on the table and without any thinking I grab it.

‘Disha, promise me you will not take those pills from now on.' bhai says.

‘I promise bhai.'

I am sorry bhai but I have to take these. I can't keep a promise. I never have and never will be able to keep the promises. I can't control myself.

I open the bottle and turn it over making all the pills fall on my hand and some on the ground. I shove all the pills in my mouth.

How much did I take?

Before I can think more about that my emotion shuts down completely. I feel myself letting go of everything. The pain vanishes like there was never before. The clenching and unclenching of my heart stops as it starts beating in a very normal beat. I let myself fall on the ground. My gaze intact on the ceiling.

I don't know for how many minutes I laid like that without any blink of sleep. I hear some sounds but I can't concentrate. After sometime a face pops up in front of me.

Bhai.

I want to call him but I don't have the strength to talk. I can't predict what he is thinking or what his facial expression is. My eyes close on instinct as some liquid falls on my eyelids.

Is he crying?

I want to tell him not to cry and that I am okay, that I am fine and I am just laying because I don't have the energy but my body can't seem to listen to me.

I feel myself being lifted, my head being kept on his shoulder. My eyes close as I feel warm hands around me. The very next second I find myself disappearing in a beautiful dream. A dream which can never come true.

I wake up. I glance around to find myself in the hospital. Tears starts spilling from my eyes.

“Why are you crying?" My head dart towards the voice to see bhai coming inside from a room. My shoulder falls in disappointment.

What was I even thinking?

“Just for everything." I mumble. I remove my gaze from bhai and stop it on the ceiling. The tears still spilling from my eyes. I don't try to stop them.

“Why did you take those pills after promising me?" Bhai ask. I don't know if he is accusing or complaining.

“I am not good with promises." I reply. I feel like there is nothing left for me in this life which I should not feel as I still have bhai and mom and dad.

“It's okay. But from now on you are not going to take those. You overdosed Disha. YOU FUCKING OVERDOSED. YOUR LIFE WAS IN DANGER........"he takes a deep breath and continues softly “What happened to get you overdosed? Did vihaan came? Did he….did he say something that hurt you? I fucking swear if he has then he is done for it."

“He didn't do anything on the contrary….. for the first time he listened to what I asked him without any fight." I mumble.

“What did you ask him to do?"

“Did he come to see me?" Instead of answering bhai's question I ask.

“No, which was very shocking. Now will you tell me what you both talked about?"

So he did what he promised. Guess I am the only one who can't keep promises.

“Just something which freed us both." I mumble. My lower lip trembles. I bite it down to stop the trembling. Suddenly I get engulfed in a hug. My lips get free from the confines of my teeth and a full blown sob escapes my lips. My hands fly over his back as I pull him closer to me.

“It's okay." 

“Bh-bhai, w-why has i-it to be tu-turned o-out li-like th-this. Why?" I cry like never before. My hands start shaking.

I want those pills. I need those pills. I can't control all this pain.

“Bh-bhai it-its pai-paining. Ma-make th-this pa-pain go away. Pleaseeee." My close eyes get his glimpses. His painful filled smile. The regretful face of his which was shadowed by the failure. “Bhai I-I ne-need th-those pi-pills."

Bhai jerks his body away from me as he parts us. My tear filled eyes were not able to see his face clearly, so I just move it to the ceiling. The trail of my tears gets lost in my hairline.

“You still want those pills? What is happening to you? Get yourself in control. You are not a baby anymore." he shouts. My anger rises. 

“I know I am not a baby. I. Am. An. Adult so let me make my own decision. Let me decide for myself. Don't interfere in my fucking life. Stop interfering in my life like I am a fucking baby. Leave me the fucking alone. I don't need anyone. Not you, not mummy and dad and not even that stupid, dumb, arrogant vihaan. I don't need anyone in my fucking life." My breathing heavy after shouting. My angry eyes intact on bhai, shooting him a death glare.