Brain on Porn (Social #2) by DeYtH Banger (novels in english TXT) 📖

good, we get quick energy, but too much will throw us off and we can crash. Oxytocin is like protein: our bodies use it more slowly but it is directly related to our physical growth and long term energy. After being involved with porn for too long, our dopamine levels are totally out of whack. We need some now and then but too much can be a problem and it won’t sustain us. What we need is oxytocin and the best way to get it is to build our connections with family and friends.

Other positive activities should be done in moderation, and should also be challenging in some sense. The reward from something we have worked towards with consistency is much more likely to trigger oxytocin.

 

Let Go

 

“Jealous is the night when the morning comes.”

Depression can give us a pretty twisted view of the world and especially of ourselves. Sometimes we don’t even notice what we are doing because we are so used to approaching situations in a negative light. You Fortifiers already know that will-power or “positive thinking” won’t cut it. You need a plan.

Take a step in someone else’s shoes. Ask yourself if you would see yourself this way if you were looking from the perspective of another person. Don’t let your secrets stand in the way. This is when having an accountability partner who you’ve honestly shared your struggles with comes in handy!

Cut yourself some slack. Many depressed people are perfectionists, holding themselves to impossibly high standards and then beating themselves up when they fail to meet them. Battle this source of self-imposed stress by challenging your negative ways of thinking.

Save problems for later. If you’re having a very negative thought or experience, don’t try and tackle it if you aren’t in a good mood. Jot it down somewhere and then go do something fun. When you’re feeling better come back to it and think about the situation in a new light. You’ll be surprised how much things change when you look at them with fresh eyes.

Like we said earlier, you have to be in this for the long haul. Don’t give up and try not to get discouraged. It may be hard now but there are better days ahead if you stick with Fortify and your recovery. We promise.

 

 

 

Combatting the Stress of Porn Addiction

 

 

 

 

Porn was our escape. A destructive and co-dependent escape, but an escape nonetheless. When hard times came into our lives, we would dodge them and go running for a fix rather than dealing with them head on. The release we felt from using porn would numb us to the bumps and bruises of life while simultaneously blinding us to the healthy joys of the world around us. In our quest to avoid pain, we closed ourselves off to happiness. But now things have changed. Recovery is breaking down the walls of isolation and addiction and we can start to feel the little things again. Warmth is returning to our minds and bodies. But sometimes those same old negative feelings creep back in.

 

As addicts we trained ourselves not deal with negativity. When pain, pressure, worry, discomfort, or boredom come into our lives, they cause stress. Stress is a huge trigger for most recovering addicts. However, like almost anything in recovery, you can turn it into a positive experience.

There are two things we need to know about the stress in our lives in order to harness it.

First, where does it come from, or what kind of stress is it?

Second, how are we responding to stress?

Let’s start with the different kinds of stress.

 

Doing Too Little

 

This is probably the most common form of stress among addicts.

Usually when we think of stress in our lives we think it’s because there is too much going on. However, people often feel the most stress because they are doing too little.

Think of this scenario: You know you have a test coming up that you need to study for but instead you binge watch something on Netflix. You then perform poorly on the test and now all of the sudden there is more pressure on future tests, you are concerned about failing the class and considering the impact that could have on your academic career.

When we aren’t prioritizing our lives and taking care of our responsibilities, small things can tend to snowball until they feel out of control. Even when we try to brush them off they are still there waiting for us. Taking time to accomplish important tasks, or just getting some little things done, you will feel stress begin to ease up. Life will feel more manageable and you will feel stronger. Like the saying goes, don’t sweat the small stuff and it’s all small stuff.

 

Doing Too Much

 

Fortifiers can fall into this trap because they want to fix everything and they want to fix it all right now. We are so eager to be free from our addictions that sometimes we stuff our lives with anything and everything that will push porn out. Sometimes though, that can bring stress in.

We need to learn to walk before we run and dealing with these things can be new for us.

You are the only one who can really decide what needs to be changed in your life but just remember that there is no shame in being human. Biting off more than you can chew won’t help you or anyone else.

 

Just Because Stress

 

Life happens, and there isn’t too much to say about it. The only thing to remember is that not all stress has to do with your actions. Addicts can tend to take all negative feelings and combine them with a sense of blame but that is never helpful.

The most important thing about any of the three forms of stress is how you deal with it.

 

Healthy Response, Healthy Growth

 

Like we already said, stress is a trigger so treat it like one. Use the skills like STAR and Urge Surfing to move past your stress in the same way you would anything else.

If those aren’t quite what you need here are a couple more tips:

1. Talk about It: Calmly discussing your situation with someone can be a great way for you to put it in perspective. Even if you’re talking to yourself… no joke. Try it.

2. Laugh it off: Again. No joke. Laughing increases your oxygen supply and stimulates the production of endorphins. Endorphins make you feel happy!

3. Exercise: Ok, we know, we talk about this in almost every article. But it’s a big deal. 20-30 minutes of breaking a sweat just 3 times a week can lower stress.

4. Get real: Learn from your strengths and weaknesses. Let go of the past and put your mistakes behind you.

5. Think positively: Choose to adopt a good attitude. Don’t think or say things that put yourself down. Find the silver lining and use it. A positive perspective can be the most crucial part at keeping stress at bay and empowering yourself.

 

 

The Porn-Free Diet

 

 

 

So many things in our lives can either contribute to our addictions or our recovery, but not all of them are obvious or direct. The biggest factor when it comes to successful recovery is doing the little things when it comes to your health, specifically diet, sleep, and exercise. Depending on the lifestyles choices we make, these little things can either supercharge our recovery or drag us down.

 

We are what we eat

 

Our diet is probably the most difficult to identify and change because we don’t always feel the immediate effects of the food we eat. Unlike exercise where you feel endorphins as soon as you finish, or feeling terrible as soon as you wake up because you stayed up all night long, the effects of a diet aren’t always readily apparent. Think about it, you don’t gain weight after eating one donut. It is a gradual process. This is exactly why diet is so important. Not only does our body’s reaction to certain foods mirror our reaction to porn (dopamine release, cravings, etc.) but a good diet is all about consistency, habit, and self-control, three things that definitely apply to recovery.

Here are some of the do’s and don’ts of food that can help your on your way to building a positive porn-free life.

 

Sugar

 

Here’s the science: sugary foods have repeatedly been shown to trigger the reward centers in our brain. This process is closely related to dopamine release, which means sugar can actually become a trigger. Humans have evolved to respond to sugar for survival. Quick and easy energy stores were hard to come by when we lived in caves, but now, high-fructose corn syrup gives us instant satisfaction. While this isn’t ideal for our health, waiting around a few thousand years for our genetic code to re-write itself is probably a bad plan. So just like in recovery, self-control is key. Too much sugar messes up our energy levels, libido, and our ability to get rid of toxins. In some cases it has also been linked to the same emotional and mental issues like anxiety and depression. Sound familiar?

 

Consistency is key

 

Don’t skip meals and don’t binge. This disorganized habit messes up your metabolism and make it harder for your body to properly use what you give it. Health reasons aside, inconsistent eating patterns usually go hand-in-hand with a lifestyle that is messy and out of control. For example, sleeping late instead of getting up in time to eat breakfast is a small example of letting things happen to you instead of you making things happen. Self-control is huge in recovery and eating at regular times is a great way to practice that.

Avoiding binging is huge as well. How often have you held off watching porn for while just to fall back into and go overboard? With food, binging is just as unhealthy. Eat small healthy snacks throughout the day and be sure to have three nutritious regular meals. Grab an apple for after breakfast and a granola bar for between lunch and dinner. Consistency and self-control are the foundation to a healthy diet and overall lifestyle.

 

You’re also what you drink

 

This is sort of an extension of the principles we discussed when dealing with sugar but drinks deserve their own category because there is so much to watch out for. Our bodies digest liquids much easier than solids, which means we can be more affected by their contents. On top of this, so many different types of drinks are unbelievably unhealthy. Alcoholic beverages, energy drinks, anything high in caffeine or caffeine substitutes, sodas (even “diet” drinks, still bad) and most juices from concentrate are the top culprits. All of these drinks are notorious for sugar content, and not having much nutritional value. Instead of going through every ingredient that we can’t even pronounce, try this instead: drink water. Water is how our body gets rid of what we don’t need and replenishes our hydration stores. If we are drinking liquids full of sugar and who knows what else, we will feel the effects. Water may not be the most exciting choice, but trust us, once you get in the habit, you’ll feel refreshed with every glass of H20.

 

Eat like a human

 

If you’re reading this and getting totally stoked for a health overhaul that consists of eating only kale and protein powder, please stop. Diet fads can often be as unhealthy as they are healthy. For example, everyone hates on carbs, but good carbs are necessary to sustain proper hormone development in your body. Hormones are also totally thrown off by something else: frequent porn viewing. Your hormones not only control your sexual health but also things like your hair and skin health, muscle development, bone density and energy levels. Basically, just eat food that can contribute to a balanced life. Include all the food groups and broaden your dietary horizons. You should also try to eat food that actually has to be prepared, whether that be a couple eggs in the morning or even a small pizza that doesn’t come in a box. This is the easiest way