Through all the tears... by Kerry Elisabeth Waddingham (best romance ebooks txt) đ
- Author: Kerry Elisabeth Waddingham
Book online «Through all the tears... by Kerry Elisabeth Waddingham (best romance ebooks txt) đ». Author Kerry Elisabeth Waddingham
Chapter 1.
âOh hiâŠâ Annie said with tears in her eyes
âHay Annieâ said Alexander.
âHow have you been?â
âHonestly Annie I am horrible... I canât stop cutting⊠thereâs so much blood all the time and I just miss you so fucking much.â
âIâŠdo miss youâŠâ
âReally?! I thought you would have hated me by now!â
âTrust me Alexander⊠I am really trying to hate you.â
âOhâŠ.â
âYes⊠I should go now...â
âNo wait... please Annie donât go⊠youâre the only one who still talks to me⊠since we broke up everyone has totally abandoned meâŠand told me that I wasnât worth your tearsâŠâ
âIâm sorryâŠ.AlexanderâŠâŠâ
âAnnie please! I love you!! Do you not get that?!?â
âI donât know what I believeâŠ.. You cheated on me two timesâŠ. And I forgave you and now⊠I just donât know.â
âPlease you donât get itâŠ.my dad told me that I was a waste of space... and that he always knew I was going to disappoint him⊠â
âIâm going to be honest with you⊠when we first started dating I had so many girls telling me that you are a cheater and you will cheat on me the same way you cheated on them⊠well because I love you I didnât believe them⊠so you have no idea how much my heart broke when you really did cheat on meâŠâ
He stood there⊠âThe last message I have from you on my phone is I guess you didnât love me enough to stopâŠâ
âI am sorry⊠thatâs just how I was feeling but I feel like shit for saying that to you... and I should have thought more about how that would make you feelâŠâ
âAnnie I guess I deservedâŠâ
âIâm sorry Alexander⊠but really I have to goâŠshe walks away leaving Alexander there with tears in his eyes and regret in his heart. She thinks to herselfâŠ: I am ok without him... I donât need him by my side to laughâŠand then she stops and whispers, I need him there to liveâŠ</3
She walks into her house and slams the door
âAnnie!!â someone yells from the living room. She walks in there terrified.
âYeah?â she asked not knowing what else to say.
âWhat the fuck is this Annie?? You fucking promised us you were done forever! Sierra yells
âWhat is what?â she asked her voice shaking and then she spots the bloody razor in her hand.â where the fuck did you find that mom?!? Stay out of my shit this is my life!!â she says storming off.
âAnnie wait!â She yells chasing after her and grabbing her arm. âLet me see your wrist right now!â
âMom leave me the fuck alone this is my life. I will cut if I want to⊠while you were snooping in my shit did you find all those things that say I hate being alive⊠why canât I be taken from this world!?
âAnnieâŠâ her mom says in tears. âI donât get it? What happened⊠you were ok⊠have you taken your depressants lately?â
âThatâs just it mom! Iâm done taking medicine for every little thing wrong with me. Thatâs whatâs wrong with this world today⊠they take medicine for everything... because now popping a pill fixes everything! Sad feel like killing yourself? Well pop a fucking pill.â
âAnnie please⊠I am begging you⊠Todd is so worried about what youâre doing to yourselfâ
âWow I fucking love thatâŠâ
âWhat? And please stop swearing Annie Dear.â
âAnnie Dear? Thatâs a new one... you never called me that⊠all those times I was cryingâŠAnnie where are my drugs?â she says mocking her mom âand I love that âToddâ is worried about what I am doing to myself⊠not my mom not my fucking dad but fucking Todd.â
âAnnie calm down, I am so tired of you disrespecting us in our own house!â Sierra yells squeezing Annieâs wrist tighter.
âOwhh! Let go of me!â
âLet me see you wrist!â sierra screams in her face
Chapter 2
âYou want to see my wrist??â Annie yells as she shakes her moms grip off of her. âHere it is.â She takes off her black hoodie. âHappy now?â she yells as she runs off.
âAnnie please wait... you donât understand that I am only doing all this to help you. Annie Dear believe me I am worried about you as well as Todd.â
Annie drops in the middle of the living room with tears falling down her face and landing on her fresh cuts. âMom you donât get it⊠you had a dad when you were growing up⊠I need my dadâ she cries harder.
Sierra rushes over to comfort Annie. âI am sorry that you donât have a dad⊠and you havenât seen him for years anyway but Wayne was a bad man⊠he was abusive in everyway to everyone... I never told you that because I didnât want you to know this but when you were a little girl your daddy would beat the shit out of you just for getting food on your face... and I hoped all these years that you would forget about that no good piece of shit.â
ââŠ.. I knowâŠâ
âYou never forgot??â
âNo...â
âThen if you remember all that then why do you want to see him?â
âThat was only when he was drunk⊠when he wasnât drunk he was a good fatherâŠâ
âAnnie thatâs not the point. He doesnât deserve to have a daughter like you.â
Annie stands up and points at Sierra. Then she yells âlike what?! Mom! I donât know if you noticed but I am not the kind of daughter that makes you put your head up high, stand in front of a bunch of other parents and yell thatâs my daughter!â
âAnnie thatâs not trueâŠ.am very proud of youâ
âSierra I am so tired of you pretending and lying to me all the time. What happened to lying isnât good?â
âOne Annie I am your mom, you will call me mom. Not Sierra and two...â
âI can call you sierra if I want to.â She says interrupting her.
âAs I was saying⊠two Annie you need help.â
âOr you could fucking let me drowned.â
Sierra begins to cry âyou donât get how much that hurts me when you say thatâŠit makes me feel like I fail as a mom if my own daughter doesnât even want to be alive.â
âFuck why donât you get it?! This isnât fucking about you anymoreâŠ!â
âThen who?â
âDonât worry about itâŠ.â
âPlease. Tell me.â
âNo I really need to go calm down.â
âAnnie Leigh tells me right now who this is about.â
âWhy canât you stay the fuck out of my life? Annie asked as her fist makes a dent in the wall.
âThis isnât you...â
âNo sierra this is.â She pulls a razorblade out of her backpack. This is the real Annie Leigh. The one that youâre so mother fucking ashamed of.â She throws the razorblade on the floor and starts to walk away. âDonât worry sierra I have more.â And she slams the door.
Sierra pauses not sure what to do until she canât take it anymore and drops on the floor crying. Sierra picks up the razorblade and she just stares at it. Annie walks wiping tears not sure where to go anymore but still she keeps walking.
When she stops she realizes where she is. Her Alexander would come here all the time. She would cry on his shoulder and he would hold her tight.
âAnnie?â
Oh shit she thinks to herself looking around to see who it was.
âAlexanderâŠâ
âYou still come here?â
âHonestly I donât know... me and mom got in a fight and I walked and then when I stopped⊠I was here...â
âAnd I was here for youâŠAnnie please can we talk foreal this time? No screaming⊠no yelling. Please? I want you to know what you really mean to me.â
ââŠ..okâ
He stops for a moment and takes a deep breath. âI love you is how I feel. I hate not talking to. I hate not being with you because you were the one person who could always make me smile. When I was sad all you had to do was walk beside me. When I cried you were the person thereâŠâ he stops beginning to cryâŠâumm you were the person there to wipe away my tears and tell me everything will be ok. That youâŠthat you loved me...â he stops wiping away the tears. âI could tell it broke your heart when ever I did the thing I did. And when you ran off crying it broke mine to.â
Annie rocks back and forth fighting the urge to wrap her arms around Alexander.â Alexander... That hurt me so bad, I couldnât understand itâŠâ
âAnnie I am so sorry I hate myself so much right now. You were the best thing that ever happened to me and then I had to fuck it up with BeccaâŠ. And now I can have herâŠ. But I cant fucking have you and I donât want her⊠I want you to be my baby girl again.â He finishes in tears.
âAlexander⊠I want to say so many things to youâŠbut I canât speak them without making you feel like shit... I miss when you used to hold me tight after me and my mom would fight⊠we laid in the grass together staring into each others eyesâŠâ
ââŠ.and I fucked that up...â he slaps him self hard.
âPlease stopâŠâ
âAnnie I canât⊠do you not understand that you are the best part of me⊠without you I should just be deadâŠâ he says reaching into his pocket...âThat is actually why I am here... I always said that if I died I wanted to be near you⊠well this is as close as I can getâŠâ
âObviously were not meant to be...â she whispers not sure what else to say. âThat doesnât mean go and die.â
âAnnie forever ended to soonâŠâ
âI knowâ she says wiping her tears away and wrapping her arms around him.
Alexander reaches over to hold her tight wiping away his own tears. âI wish we could stay like this forever.â
Chapter 3
âI knowâ Annie says wiping tears away.
âWhy are you crying? Alexander asks moving her away so he can look at her face.
âBecause⊠we canâtâŠ.â she begins to cry
âAnnieâŠ. I swear I fucking love you⊠and I need you. I am nothing without you... I really thought that we would be the couple out of everyone to last forever, get married⊠start a family and live a happy life⊠and then I had to fuck it up.â He says wiping her tears away and holding her tight.
âI love you to Alexander⊠I always thought we would to...â Annie reaches up and kisses his cheek. âI always hoped we would to.â
âFUCK. I really hate myselfâŠâŠâ
âWhy?â
âI feel so stupidâŠ. I fucked everything up⊠the one girl who really cared for me and not herself⊠and I fucked it up.â He cries
ââŠI hate this⊠right now all I want to do is call you booâŠ.â
âYou have
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