Syndrome by Thomas Hoover (read along books txt) đ
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Ally handed over the Zabarâs bag and walked in. âHi, sweetie.â
Nina was on the lounger, where she spent most of her waking hours. Yes, she was definitely having a good day today. Sheâd done a full makeup number.
Her face could only be described as youthful, no matter that she was past sixty-five. She had elegant cheekbones and a mouth that was still sensuous. And her blue eyes remained lustrous, though nowadays they often seemed to be searching for something, or someone, no longer there. She had a colorist come in every three weeks to keep her hair the same brunette it had always been, and that had a way of making Ally fantasize she hadnât aged at all. Ally also felt-hoped-she might be looking at a spitting image of herself some decades hence. You could do a lot worse.
The TV was on, sound turned low, and her mother was staring at the multihued screen. Probably the tape of a Spanish-language soap sheâd somehow missed. Three cosmetic-heavy women in deeply cut blouses were arguing, all appearing either angry or worried or both.
In times past Nina was always starting some new project, claiming that was how she kept her mind alert. She had taught herself French and had a very good accent, particularly for a Brit. Just before the Alzheimerâs hit, she decided to try to learn Spanish, as something to divert her mind and keep it active. She also wanted to be able to chat with the increasingly Hispanic workforce in restaurants and delis.
Now, though, Ally thought her mom was continuing the language study as part of a program of denial. Nina knew her mind was being stripped from her, but she was determined to try to wrestle it back by giving herself mental challenges. The struggle was hopeless, of course, but her spirit refused to admit that.
Ally bent down and kissed her clear white forehead. âHey, howâs it going?â
âLook at those pathetic creatures,â she declared, only barely acknowledging Allyâs presence. âIf boobs were brains, theyâd all be Einstein. In my day women knew how to make themselves attractive. Simplicity. Less is more.â
Yep, Ally thought, this is going to be a good day. Sheâs obviously spent an hour on makeup. For all her complaining she probably watches Mariaâs soaps at least in part to glean cosmetic tips. Who knew, maybe she was learning Spanish too, like she claimed. Dear God, let her do it.
Maria was looking into the Zabarâs bag. âOh, sheâs going to love this. Could you come in the kitchen and help me fix a tray?â
Thatâs strange, Ally thought. Maria thinks Iâm all thumbs around food preparation and she never wants me in the kitchen.
The apartment was old enough that the kitchen was a separate room with an open doorway. When they stepped inside, Maria set down the bag and turned to her.
âThere was a man here yesterday. I never saw him before. He said he was your brother. Is that true?â
Ally felt a chill go through her body.
âYour mother seemed to know him,â Maria went on, âbut I wasnât sure whether she might have just been pretending. Sometimes you never know what she gets or doesnât get. Sheâs a good faker.â
âWhat⊠what did he want?â
âWell, the first thing seemed to be that he wanted to ask your mother a question about you. Then he started trying to talk her into going to some clinic out in New Jersey, where they might be able to help⊠her mind.â
Shit. What is he up to? Is he trying to get to me through Nina?
âYou said he asked Mom a question about me? Whatââ
âWhat are you two whispering about?â came a voice from the doorway.
âAll kinds of secrets.â Ally glanced up and smiled. âMaria was just telling me about a visitor you had yesterday, Mom. Do you remember if anyone came to see you?â
âPish. Of course I remember. Seth. But sometimes I think Iâd just as soon not.â She stared at Ally, those searching blue eyes boring in. âDo you ever see him anymore?â
Funny you should ask, she thought.
Then she wondered, why not tell the truth? She couldnât think of any reason not to.
âAs a matter of fact, Mom, Grant came by my building this very morning. I hadnât seen him in ages. He called and said he wanted to meet me while I was out running. I told him to bug off, but he came anyway. He wanted me to⊠Letâs just say heâs still wheeling and dealing.â
Nina looked at her for a long moment.
âHe showed up here yesterday morning, darling, out of the blue. After all those years when he didnât give a shit-excuse my Francais. I acted like I didnât quite know who he was, but I got every word. Heâs still spending his salary on clothes. He talked a lot, saying he knew a man-a doctor with some kind of experimental treatment-who could turn back the clock on my⊠or at least stop it. He could give me a chance to take my mind back. And then he left his card. He wanted me to talk to you about it and then call him back.â
Grant, you bastard. You didnât say a word about any of this. Whatâre you trying to do?
No need for rocket science. He was using Nina as bait. This was his way to make sure she was dragged into whatever shenanigans he was up to. If he got Nina out to that place in New Jersey, whatever it was, it would be like he had a hostage.
She was so angry she was gasping for air. And she felt that damned tightness in her chest coming on.
âI told Maria to throw the card away,â Nina went on, âbut then I got to wondering. What if itâs true?â
âYou donât really thinkââ
âOf course not,â Nina declared, but Ally wasnât sure how much she meant it. âProbably he just needs money. Thatâll come next. Iâd guess heâs hoping Iâll give him a âdown paymentâ for this âtreatment,â whatever it is. Thatâs surely whatâs going on. Trying to take advantage of a senile old woman.â
Nina didnât appear to be fooled. Or was she? Sometimes she did her thinking out loud before coming to a conclusion.
âSeth may be barking up the wrong tree with me, Ally,â she went on. âIâm not sure I want any of his miracle cures. Iâve lived my life. Iâm tired.â She looked away. âWhen youâre young, you never think about what itâs like to be old. But then when you do get old you somehow canât imagine being young again. Having to do it all overâŠâ Her voice trailed off.
Yes, Ally thought, youâve had plenty of pain you wouldnât want to relive.
Nina sat back down on her flowered chaise and closed her eyes. âDo you know what day this is?â
âI was hoping youâd remember.â She reached and grasped her hand. âItâs been five years today. Exactly.â
âI still have nightmares about it, the horror, â Nina said, her eyes still closed âbut he did it for me, you know. He thought the insurance was all that would save me. And then when it didnât⊠So now weâve got to hang on with all weâve got. For him.â She opened her eyes and looked directly at Ally. âOne day soon, maybe sooner than we think, Iâm going to be mad as a hatter. Time, Ally, time has played a cruel joke. God the Prankster is keeping me in physical health so I can experience every step of my own degradation.â Then she glanced back at the Spanish soap and went on. âI hope you know how to enjoy life, while youâre still full of it. Donât miss a minute.â
âIâm going to try, Mom.â Ally squeezed her hand again and for that moment sensed Nina was her old self. She wasnât going to tell her about Dr. Ekelman and the latest heart news. But if she did the response would probably still be the same. Just live life for all itâs worth. You never know if thereâs even going to be a tomorrow.
âWould you put on some Janacek?â she said finally, aiming the remote at the TV and clicking it off. âOne of the string quartets. Iâve had my fill of Hispanic tarts. Iâve learned a good deal of Spanish from them, but sometimes I think understanding what theyâre saying just makes it all that much cheaper.â
That was when Ally realized with a burst of joy that Nina still had an interior life that she was carefully hoarding. What else was going on in that mind? The sense of the night closing in? Do not go gentle. Please. Stay awhile with me.
She got up and went over to the record cabinet. Her mother still had her collection of old 33s, today they were called vinyl, with conductors from decades ago like Bruno Walter and Arturo Toscanini. She found a Janacek String Quartet, No. 2, a rare mono pressing by the old Budapest String Quartet fifty years ago, and put it on the turntable, still loving those first crackling sounds that raise your anticipation. She remembered how Nina would put on a record in the evening, after dinner, with room-temperature scotch in hand, and make the family sit and listen. She suspected that had a lot to do with her own desire to play the violin herself someday. And then, in high school, she started lessons. Better late than never.
Now, though, she sensed there was something Nina wanted to tell her and this was her way of setting the stage.
After the music had played for almost three minutes, Nina listening with eyes closed as though in a rapture as the movement clawed its way toward an initial theme in an elusive minor mode, she turned and looked at Ally.
âHe didnât tell you he came to see me, did he? Seth?â
âI guess he forgot,â Ally said. It was a lie neither of them believed.
âIâve been thinking over all he was trying to say. I didnât get everything at the time, but I guess my feeble mind was recording it. Now itâs all coming back. He was talking about Arthur and his suicide-Ally, we both know thatâs what it was-and how he felt responsible and how he was finally going to be able to make up for all the harm heâd done to me, and to you. But he was worried you might not want to go along with this special treatment for me.â She was studying Ally, as though searching for an answer. Maria had discreetly departed for the kitchen. âHe kept talking about this doctor he knew. At this clinic. He swore this man could perform a miracle for me. He said I should do it, whether you approved or not.â
Ally looked at her, wondering what to say. This was getting too devious for words.
Then Nina went on. âIâll probably not remember anything about this by tomorrow. But I just wanted to tell you. When you get as mentally addled as I am now, you compensate by developing your other senses, I call it your sixth sense. And Ally, I think heâs involved in something thatâs evil. And he wants to draw me into it, maybe both of us.â She stopped carefully framing her words. âI sensed a kind of desperation about him. I donât know exactly what it was.â
As Ally listened the Janacek quartet swelling in the room, scratches and all, she felt more
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