Four Letter Word by Anthony C Klein (black books to read txt) 📖

Every person in this world has needs. Every need is subverted by a want. Each person’s greatest need is to feel needed. In accordance, each person’s greatest want is to feel wanted. No matter whom we are these two statements ring true. It is one of the few absolutes in life. Humans need this feeling to have a reason for their existence. Without feeling needed, people are inclined to do inconceivable things. Things that can redefine these poor souls in the worst ways possible.

With every action, every once abhorred activity, another piece of who they once were fades away. It is when enough pieces fall away, that they become something completely changed. And that is when they crumble.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

The front door slammed open, and the noise of the never ending rain became much more intense. The elderly woman sat up straighter in her chair, and simply stared at the figure attempting to sneak its way into her house. The red hair, the green eyes, the freckles… they were all very familiar to her. This was no stranger. Then again, the woman no longer knew who this person was. The mini-skirt, the halter top… They were not familiar. Two years ago, she would never have associated anything that this person wore or did with her daughter. But now… they were one and the same. A familiar stranger.

“Where have you been?” It was a question she had asked countless times before. No longer was it said with any worry or emotion. It was monotone and routine. The girl stopped, and peered over her shoulder at the woman. Her evergreen eyes that were once so carefree and happy were now faded and full of a deep despair. A despair that she hid all too well.

“Out.” Was the simple answer. Her mother, as a force of habit, dared not ask further. Pick your battles as it were. But tonight the tone of the answer hit a nerve, and within seconds the girl’s mother was out of the chair and in her face.

“Do not

use that tone with me! I am your mother, and I want answers! Where were you until five o’clock in the morning?!” She screamed both with anger and agony. The two females stared at one another for a long while, nearly five minutes until the younger responded.

“Heh… You try so hard to be the ‘protective’ mother, Patricia. It’s pathetic really. Get out of my face, and my life.” She smirked darkly, and began to walk around her aging mother. But once again, she had bitten off more than she could chew.

Smack!

Patricia Frost went into frenzy. Smacking and pushing her daughter. She could not control the rage she had suppressed inside of her finally escape. She yelled and screamed and hit her daughter; she didn’t think--she just acted.

“You whore! You filthy little whore! You don’t think I can smell the sex on you?! You little whore! I don’t even know who you are anymore! What happened to you Melina? What happened to my daughter?!”
Melina grabbed her mother’s hand as she went in for another smack and threw the woman to the ground. She could hear only the breaths she and her mother took for the next few seconds. She smiled sadly at her mother, and made her way towards the door.

“She’s dead, Patricia.”

“Get out of my house! Out! Out, out, out!” Her mother screamed as the door slammed closed. She felt her eyes well up with tears, and put her hand to her face to catch them. What had happened to her? What had happened to her daughter? What happened to her family?

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

“Huff… huff… huff… huff…”

The only thing Melina Frost could hear besides the pitter-patter of the rain against the pavement was the shallow, ragged breaths she took and the obnoxiously loud tintibulation of her heart’s beat. Her once fiery and vibrant hair looked dull and lifeless as it clung to her rain-drenched face. Her eyes still held that abiding despair, a despair of a broken heart. Or in Melina’s case, a shattered one. After about ten solid minutes of running through the storm, she slowed her pace and walked to the side of the road. She leaned her weight against the rickety wooden fence line, and looked down at the forest below. She felt her eyes begin to well up, but forced it down as she’d done so many times before. Her face was full of grief, and she truly wished that what she told her mother was true. That she was dead.

A crack of thunder startled her, and she fell against the fence line. With the rain and its age, the wood easily splintered beneath her weight. Her eyes widened as she fell from the cliff’s edge. Her petite body flew downwards, the rocky cliff side breaking her fall and injuring her body. She fell into the branches of trees, snapping them off and cutting her face and body. She crumpled as she fell, and landed in a heap on the muddy floor. She willed herself through the pain and onto her back, and stared up at the stormy skies.

Melina felt the salty tears slide down her face… and it stung. It burned as it slid down her pale cheeks… the cold rain pouring down upon her kept the fact that she was crying hidden from the trees… but she knew… she knew how those tears stung…

Oh how she knew… Crying was for children… she was no child… she couldn’t cry… Because… It hurt…

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Melina was exited. Today was the day she and William had decided to finally bring their relationship to the next level! Melina had always heard from the girls in school about how their boyfriends would romantically seduce them. It always sounded like it was so nice… to have someone love you so much that they would do anything to be with you. Will had always told her how beautiful she was, and how much he loved being with her… but he’d never said those three words to her.

Heather told her that it was because she was being too much of a prude. To get people to love you, you had to give them what they wanted. Melina remembered the how the boys at school spoke about their girlfriends when she would listen in on their conversations. They always said how the girls would seductively kiss them… touch them… let the men do anything they wanted to them. The men always sounded so happy when they talked about it.

Maybe that was why Will didn’t say he loved her…
Heather was right… Lance always said he loved Heather… Melina had to do it. It didn’t matter if she was scared. She had to make Will love her. She couldn’t let him leave her… she needed him, and she’d give him anything he wanted to keep him… anything for him to love her.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

“MELINA!?!?!” Patricia Frost screamed as she entered the room. Her daughter turned to her with a look of surprise mixed with fright. Patricia had decided to come home early today and surprise her daughter by taking her out to dinner. Patricia’s job made it hard for her to be around for her daughter, so when her boss told her to head home early she jumped at the opportunity.

She had never expected this though…

She entered her daughter’s room to find her on her bed, in only her panties, her legs spread open. The worst part though, was the shirtless teen boy between said legs. His pants were undone and sliding down his hips, his hands were groping her breasts and his tongue was deep in her mouth. When Melina saw her mother, she yelped and pushed the boy off of her. Her mother screamed in uncontrollable rage, and almost literally threw the boy out of the house.

Melina begged her mother to calm down, but it was to no avail. Her mother forbade her to leave the house. She grounded her daughter and refused to even LOOK at the girl. Melina cried and begged her mother to talk to her. She yelled that she loved him, and that she was only trying to make him love her back… Her mother ignored her. She refused to listen to the insane babbling coming from the daughter she thought she knew.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~**~**~*

At school the next day, Heather told Melina that there was no hope now… She failed at love. He didn’t love her. Melina looked for Will in the halls. He avoided her like the plague. She finally was able to corner him after school, but he laughed at her. She said that she loved him, she begged him not to leave her. He sneered at her.

“I can’t do this anymore. This was fun at first but… you’re just too inexperienced. I wanted to have a good time as a senior, not have a new accessory. I’m sorry Mel. It’s not going to work out. I don’t love

you. We’re breaking up. That’s just how it has to be. Don’t take it to heart, okay? I’ll see you around.” He said to her, smiling, before walking off and leaving her there to cry.

Melina broke apart. Her heart shattered into a million pieces. She cried… she couldn’t control it. It was impossible to stop. Her love was denied… He hated her… She failed. Heather was right… She didn’t give him what he wanted… what he NEEDED from her…

He couldn’t love her…

No more crying… Make people love you…

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Melina shattered when her new ‘boyfriend’ shunned her the next day… She gave him what he wanted… didn’t he love her?! That’s what Heather said! People love you when you give them what they want! He was a liar… he used her… he was supposed to love her! He was supposed to be the one to make her feel good! He was supposed to love her after she gave herself to him!

She’d make him pay… she’d make them both pay…

They were supposed to love her…

They were supposed to NEED her…

No crying… Crying is for children…

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

That’s what she did… she gave herself over and over…

But…

They never loved her… not once…

Why?

Heather said they loved you when you gave them what they wanted…

Maybe they wanted MORE…

Don’t cry…

Give them what they want…

Make them love you…

You’re not a child… Crying is for children…

Even when it hurts… Don’t cry…

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

This was it wasn’t it? Her limp form lay there in the mud, bloody and broken. Melina’s eyes wandered to look at her hand. Her fingers were bent in the wrong direction, and she could all but see the tissue inside of her arm. She tried to sit up as best as she could but to no avail. She felt dizzy. Her mind was a mess of memories and nausea. Soon she was able to roll herself into a nearby tree and with the hand that wasn’t a bloody mess, she dragged her failing body up against it into a sitting position.

Suddenly, her brief numbness gave way to unyielding agony, and Melina found herself unable to move.

Something wasn't right. Her whole lower body, from the torso down, ached and throbbed as though it had been run