Running from disaster (unfinished) by Vickky Unkown (brene brown rising strong TXT) 📖

My mother is getting re-married, why? well according to my mother my father was never really around he was always listening to his family talking shit about my mom, and believed it too! So they seperated she's actually still married to my father but not legally just in islam, they call it nikah. She had no idea what was going on until after it happened. From what my mother told me about my father he didn't seem too nice and i didn't like him for that but what would I know i'm only 5! I have one dimple on the left side of my cheek, have olive skin color and long jet black hair. My eyes are a big and glossy with long lashes that anyone would kill for and nice little plump pink lips. Anyway, my mother is getting married to a man who seemed like a nice guy he was very tall and fair skinned with jet black hair and brown eyes he had dimples on the side of his cheeks everytime he laughed or smiled. My mother is also light skinned with brown curly hair and big brown glossy eyes and the height of 5"5. My mother Shelly and her now husband Sean were getting married. They met in a club and he kept bugging her to marry him and he actually followed her and told my grandmother he wanted to marry her. My grandmother *sigh* sweet old lady love her so much she's 5'2 with jet black jerry curls and very light skinned and freckles on her perfect little face and small brown eyes. She is so adorable I love my nana she's my everything. My grandma wasn't too sure about him but she accepted and here we are watching my mother get married to this guy we don't know well. 

After the wedding was finished and every one ate had their share of alcohol etc. my mother and I moved up to Oshawa it was a very rundown area but it was quiet. I was a little scared meeting new people going to school with people who i don't even know. My mother walked me to school everyday, when we got there I took a look around the school and whispered to my mother "mommy, there's no one like me here....i'm scared" She smiled and hugged me trying to reassure me that everything would be ok. Of course I would be scared from what I saw i was the only girl of color so it felt extreemely weird and uncomfortable. I mean, not trying to sound like a racist person or anything it's just that it would be nice to see someone like me around too. As I walked in to my class my teacher Miss Berry smiled and brought me to the front of the class. "Everyone, this is ...." she paused and looked at me. "v-v-v-vanessa" I stuttered, damn I sounded like a train wreck. I looked at everyone and all of them were staring at me like i was an alien or something from another planet. As i walked at the back to sit down on the carpet i finally saw a girl just like me! I smiled and she smiled back so I took a seat next to her. " Hi, i'm Tenisha want to play dressup after?" I nodded and waited till the teacher was finished speaking to play dressup. From then on Tenisha and I became best of friends and I finally felt like maybe things wouldn't be so bad after all. Tenisha came over to my house during lunch and we played together she even came after school. I lived down the street by the way, Tenisha was a Afrcan-American girl with big glossy brown eyes and she always wore overalls she always had her hair in two side ponytails she was my best friend. I thought to myself I could get use to this.

 "Vanny It's dinner time!" my mother yelled I was in my room playing with my barbie dolls and did not pay attention and did not notice my mother calling me. "Vanny brown! did you not hear me call you? dinner is ready put your toys away before daddy get's in here and yells at you" " sorry mommy, i didn't know that you were calling me i'm coming" my mother made me call her husband sean daddy because she's married to him so that's what I eneded up doing even though i had no Idea who my bilogical father was...I do know who he is but it's all so blurry could not remeber how he looked like at all. However, I would never think about that because i'm only a kid. The next day was my birthday and I was turning 6 years old so my so called D-A-D  was trying to give me the talk. Aren't you supposed to get the talk when you fully understood what sex meant? I had no idea what that was at least not yet anyways. My mother left me in the living room one day and went in the room with my dad....or her husband whatever. I became hungry and wanted the strawberries in the fridge, I knocked on the door and i seriously thought that i heard her say come in as I walked through the door i saw her husband on top her. Again, i'm a kid i didn't know what is going on. "oh, um hi sweety me and your mom are just playing a game what would you like" said Sean in a high - pitched voice. "i'm hungry I want strawberries" " no strawberries baby, go back in the living room and i'll get you some food ok?" I nodded my head and waited and waited and waited my mom was taking forever and she finally came in to the living room and took out some food for me in a plate. Anyway, I guess that's why Sean thought that it was appropriate time to give me the talk. "Vanny come sit on my lap" I walked to sean and sat on his lap while my mother was sitting across from him. "I think i need to talk to you about something called sex, he pointed below my waist and slightly touched me and said "this is your vagina and when a penis goes in there you are having sex never make a penis go in there ok"  I nodded even though i didn't know what the hell he was talking about. It felt kind of weird that he kept touching me because i felt like something was wrong with this picture but didn't think nolthing of it. 

After that day Sean called me in his room and put me on top of him and told me to rock back and fourth like it was a rocking chair. "why?" I asked out of curiousity I was a smart girl but I didn't think of anything because one I trusted him he is my mother's husband he couldn't be a pervert. "don't worry just do it" I did as he told me with confusion on my face as to why he would ask me to do this. It wasn't fun and it didn't seem like a game it was certainly odd. As he heard my mother coming out of the bathroom he immediately told me to stop and had the same sex talk with me again. My mother stared at him "Sean, again? how many times you going to tell her she's just a kid." my mother said sounding tired "She has to know Shelly, she needs to be prepared for all those guys out there preying on girls, fresh meat"  My mother rolled her eyes "Vanny, go to sleep hunny"  I nodded and went to my room.

 As i entered my room i shut the door and put on my pajamas. my bed was filled with books on the shelves and toys i loved to read. As I layed in bed i felt weird for some reason my gut kept telling me something was wrong but I didn't know what it was. Just so I can sleep i picked up my Lion King book off the shelf and began to read it until i felt tired. 

The next morning my mom woke me up for breakfast amd told me to brush my teeth and come have something to eat. "MOMMY, IT'S MY BIRTHDAY!!!"  "I know" she replied casually as she didn't care. I went to brush my teeth and take a shower and sat down and have my toast with scrambled eggs and orange juice. After having my breakfast I went back to my room and played with my toys when i heard the phone ring and people started coming in the house. I peeped outside and it was all of my aunts and uncles, what are they doing here so early i wondered to my self. " Vanny, happy birthday baby!" She did know my mom came in and gave me a hug and a kiss and gave me a outfit to put on. It was a nice white top with a nice white skirt, my mother came in and helped me put on my white stalkings that went with it. We celebrated my birthday and had cake every one was so happy to see me and I was so happy to see everyone my grandma especially. She always brought me new books everytime she came to see me. "Hi sweetheart, you are 6 years old now you're getting so big look what i got for you" I opened the wrapped gift and to my supprise it was another book "101 DALMATIONS!!!! thank you grandma! can we read it now?" i asked anxiously. My grandmother laughed and said I will read it to you before you go to sleep. I was happy especially knowing that most likely she was staying over. Tenisha came over with her mom and me and Tenisha went into my room and played with my dolls we had so much fun. Her mother came in to the room and smiled "Happy Birthday Vanny" she said "thank you aunty" I was always told respect your elders call them aunty or uncle which I have always done that until now.

I became very tired and every one was starting to go home my grandma began to get me ready for bed and laid down next to me. She pulled out the 101 dalmations book and began reading it to me. "Cruella didn't seem to hear this I worship furs, I...lived....for ...furs...." she then covered me and kissed me on the forehead "sweetdreams princess"