The Wily Tortoise by Imonikhe Ahimie (top 100 novels of all time .txt) 📖

she was not to change her method of cooking; he wanted the same fare as he had had for the three days previous. Meekly, Mrs. Tortoise explained that she had run out of the special ingredient that had made those meals so flavorful. Then, cried the Tortoise, she must go about finding the special ingredient, or else……. Then, with a gleeful smile upon her face, Mrs. Tortoise carefully explained to her husband the origin of that special ingredient.

*****

To say that the Tortoise was furious would be a gross understatement. Seething with rage, a frenziedly wrathful Tortoise dashed into his room, snatched up his machete, and, frothing at the mouth, swore by every deity in existence to cut his wife up into tiny little bits! The wife fled for dear life, pursued by her irate husband. In her desire to escape her husband’s manic anger, Mrs. Tortoise clean forgot her husband’s instruction as to which pathway to avoid. The very pathway that the Tortoise had forbidden her to use was readiest for her getaway and she had no hesitation in bolting down the path. The Tortoise followed her down the path for some ways but was unable to catch her. Determined to punish his wife for the trick she had played on him, but equally determined not to come near to the Leopard, the Tortoise resolved to stop where he was and await his wife’s return. With his mind made up, he hid himself behind a large iroko tree growing beside the pathway and proceeded to wait.

 

Now, the Leopard was still dangling, seven days after, where the Tortoise had left him. From his vantage point in the air, he had seen the Tortoise pursuing his wife and he could now see the Tortoise where he was hiding behind the great iroko tree. As for Mrs. Tortoise, so intent was she on escaping her husband’s murderous attention that she ran right underneath the dangling Leopard in her headlong dash without even noticing him.

 

“Mrs. Tortoise; Mrs. Tortoise; please help me for God’s sake”.

 

The thin squeaky voice brought her to a halt. Who could be calling her, she thought. It wasn’t her husband’s voice but, although the voice held some trace of familiarity, she couldn’t make out whose voice it was. Looking around her, she could see no one, then, happening to glance above her, she beheld the dangling Leopard.

 

“Your Highness!” she cried in shock, “what are you doing up there?”

 

As best he could the Leopard narrated what had occurred and entreated Mrs. Tortoise to set him free. Mrs. Tortoise was quite naturally apprehensive; after seven days hanging in the tree, an already famine-battered Leopard would be extremely hungry indeed. If she set him free, would she not be his first meal? As these thoughts swirled in her mind, the Leopard perceived what must be troubling her.

 

“My dear Mrs. Tortoise” the Leopard wheezed. “I would be the most ungrateful wretch in all of creation if I were to repay your kindness by eating you. My anger is not directed towards you but towards your husband whom, I suspect, is also your enemy.” Then he swore a great oath, invoking every single one of his illustrious ancestors to always be a friend to and protector of Mrs. Tortoise if she would only do him this kindness. So, Mrs. Tortoise climbed up into the tree and set the Leopard free. Then, rushing into the nearby bush, she found a few rotting stuff and some water for a hurried meal for the by now thoroughly famished Leopard.

 

When the Leopard had regained a bit of his strength, he thanked Mrs. Tortoise profusely for her help. “By the bye” he went on, “I could not help but notice that as you ran down the pathway, your husband, that ignoble fellow, was in hot pursuit with his machete drawn. Pray, what was all that about? For myself, I know that the Tortoise is certainly at fault, for the whole world knows, Mrs. Tortoise that you are the quietest person in the land and are not given to causing trouble. ” So Mrs. Tortoise explained all to him. As she told her story, the Leopard’s ire grew; that the Tortoise would actually treat his own wife in this manner. He was now more determined than ever to serve condign punishment upon the Tortoise. Thanking Mrs. Tortoise once again, the Leopard got up and started to stalk towards the tree where he knew the Tortoise was stationed.

 

*****

In the meantime, the Tortoise who was somewhat exhausted from the effects of the chase had fallen asleep as he leaned against the iroko tree. The first he knew of the Leopard’s freedom was when he was lifted off the ground by the scruff of his neck and shaken in a most violent manner. “Now, I have you” growled the Leopard.

 

Faced with imminent death, the Tortoise had to think and think very rapidly indeed. In a jiffy, he had withdrawn his head and his limbs into his shell and, try as he would, the Leopard could not get at him. “Well” declared the frustrated Leopard finally “what I’ll do is that I’ll carry you right up to the top of the tallest tree in the entire forest and fling you down! That ought to put paid to you and your shenanigans once and for all!”

 

The Tortoise’s heart skipped a beat but, pretending that he had misheard the words spoken by the Leopard, he started to scream from inside his shell: “Oh, your highness! Please! Oh, please! Forgive me! Don’t throw me into the fast flowing waters; oh please, don’t! I’ll never behave in such a manner ever again! The devil made me do it. Please, oh please don’t fling me away into the fast flowing waters!” And so on and so forth.

 

“Well” declared the Leopard, “I hadn’t thought of flinging you into any fast flowing waters but perhaps that’s what I’ll do now that you’ve mentioned.”

 

Now the Tortoise wailed and he wailed. He bemoaned his fate at the top of his voice. Why, oh why, had he made mention of fast flowing waters? Whatever had caused him to reveal his greatest weakness to a vengeful enemy? And he continued to plead; he would reform his character, he declared; he would do anything to placate the Leopard. But it was all to no avail. Aside of an evil chuckle from time to time, the Leopard made no answer.

 

Now, the sound of the rushing river reached them clearly and the Tortoise’s wails became even more agitated and frantic. He called upon the deities and upon every single one of his ancestors to come to his aid and free him from the grasp of a cruel and unrelenting enemy. He called upon the Most High God. Alas! The Leopard was not moved. Climbing up to the top of the tallest tree on the river bank, and whispering “good riddance to bad rubbish”, the Leopard flung the wailing Tortoise down into the fast flowing waters of the river.

 

Then, as soon as the Tortoise hit the water, out came his head and all of his other extremities. With a cheeky smile upon his face, he flung a saucy salute at the surprised Leopard as he swam away smoothly to yet another adventure.

i Yemoja is a sea deity worshiped amongst the Yoruba people of Nigeria.

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Publication Date: 09-12-2015

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Dedication:
For my grandma, Virginia Ilekiwere Ahimie, nee Imoneko (1901 - 2001). Thank you for the unending stories.