In Me by Tiffany Anyel (novels to improve english .TXT) 📖

ocean--it's depth.

Silently thinking how much we were alike--how the surface was just that--the surface. There was so more underneath--like me. Waiting to be discovered--or not. I guess that choice was up to me...

"Kate?" "Yea?" I said finally turning to look at him. "Are you sure you're okay?"

I smile at him--and pretending I had snapped out of my 'silent haze'--I bump him on the shoulder, “So what have you been doing since lunch? I didn’t see you at the beach this afternoon.”

He lets out a laugh. And seeing his expression I let out a chuckle of my own, "What? What's so funny?"

He looks at me laughing--shaking his head, "No I cant--you'll think I'm a perv."

Surprised at his response--and silently gaining interest I look at him, "Come on--you have to tell me now. What is it?"

Laughing he lets out a sigh, “Well this is kind of embarrassing but me and some of the guys had a bet going on. And let’s just say--we lost horribly. So now we have to cook dinner for the girls tonight.”

“Oh really? And what was the bet?” He lets out a laugh, “Well that’s the embarrassing part--we were...betting to see if John could pull off convincing these two girls to sleep with him.” Shocked I let out a laugh, “What?!”

He turns to me laughing, “Yea I know. But me and Chad thought he could do it--he has before. Chad has been sulking ever since--he hates to lose.”

“So…what happened to these two girls--I’m guessing since you guys lost did they kick his ass or something?”

“Yea, pretty much--one even slapped him. You should have seen John—I don’t think that has ever happened to him before. He didn’t know what to do with himself. It was so funny.” He finally said shaking his head.

Laughing with him I respond, “Well who won?” “Oh Jenn and her girlfriend Ronnie--and they haven’t let us hear the end of it.”

Smiling I look at him, “So do you guys need any help--with dinner tonight? I'm not much of a cook--but I have watched enough of 'other people' doing it on t.v.”

Letting out a laugh--he shakes his head, “No, I couldn't--even though I have had to pull a not-to-happy Chad around all evening while we shopped for food--it’s been a chore to say the least. But you are my guest Kate. And I'm not too

bad in the kitchen--and knowing you will be tasting it--well it makes it even more special.”

Smiling I respond, “You're too cute--have I told you that already?"

Laughing he looks at me, "Yes you have--but I could stand hearing it again." Smiling I look in his eyes, "Well--you are just too

cute Paul."

He Lets out a laugh--and smiles meeting my eyes, “So…about that kiss…”

I smile at him, “Yea? What about it?” Smiling he takes my hand--gently rubbing his thumb over it as he held it, “Is there a chance I could be getting another one of those in the future--like now maybe? I haven’t been able to stop thinking about your lips all day.”

He looks at my lips--and lightly tugs on my bottom one. Staring in his eyes I look down at his lips--as he brings his face closer. Closing my eyes I wait. He brings his hand up slightly running it through my hair finally kissing me.

Letting it happen--I open my mouth kissing him back. I bring my hand up--running it through his hair as we played with our tongues.

And silently waiting for something to happen--a feeling, a wanting deep within me somewhere--he finally pulls away.

I open my eyes looking in his--it never came.

Maybe I just needed to try harder?--or maybe I had just become too ‘rusty’ at this 'kissing thing' and I had completely missed it?

Maybe if we kissed for longer...

I liked Paul. He was adorable. He was funny, smart, sexy as hell--and incredibly sweet. He was the whole package—a true gentleman. And I even enjoyed kissing him I realized. So I should be…I dunno feeling something right about now. Shouldn’t I? So why wasn’t I? What was wrong with me?

“Kate? What’s wrong?” Realizing I was still staring at him--with all I was thinking apparently written all over my face--I pretend to clear my throat letting out a laugh, “Oh nothing is wrong—it’s just…it’s been awhile since anyone has kissed me that’s all.”

“Wow really?” Silently letting out a breath that he bought it--even though I was actually telling the truth I respond, “Yea.”

“That is really hard to believe--just look at you. You are beyond beautiful Kate.” Blushing I smile at him. Hearing stomps grow louder as they approach--the screen door finally opens.

Turning our heads we see Chad pause--startled as he saw us on the steps, “Oh hey. Dude they are ready to eat. So we should go ahead and get this over with. Sorry Kate but I have to steal your man for a while.” He finally said sounding annoyed.

“Oh it’s okay,” and I turn to Paul saying, “I guess I’ll see you at dinner?”

“Of course—I’ll let you know when it’s ready. I hope you like it.” He finally said sounding a little nervous as he lightly kissed me on the lips following Chad into the house.


After eating the best ‘home-made’ food I had had in a while--and silently thankful that no fights broke out during dinner, I walk upstairs to my room.

Jenn and I had been on our best behavior--choosing to ignore each other seemed to work pretty well. She didn’t even give me any hateful looks or snappy comments--which surprised me. But it also made me feel a lot better too.

Maybe there was a friendship waiting in the wings for us after all--okay maybe I’m getting a little carried away. But who knows maybe.

Lee didn’t show. I got the feeling maybe something happened between them. When someone asked Jenn where he was--she just shrugged saying he had to do something. But she never explained what that something was.

Even though I was kind of bummed I hadn’t seen him--a part of me was also relieved. I didn’t know how I was going to fix this--I didn’t even know if our friendship could be fixed. Maybe it was over. I just couldn’t bring myself to believe that though--there had to be something I could do.

I take a shower and closing the bathroom door--I turn and see Lee sitting on my bed. Realizing I was standing in the room--he finally looked up at me, “Hey.”

Surprised that he was actually here--in my room I clear my throat saying, “Hey.” I slowly walk over putting my clothes away.

“So…how was your day?” Lee said as he watches me zip up my suitcase. “Oh umm…it was quite good actually. Me and Sam kicked ass on the beach playing volleyball.”

“Really? I forgot how much you loved to play.” “Yea I know--me too.” Sitting on the bed I look at him, “So…how was your day?”

Looking at me he smiles, “Well it wasn’t as eventful as yours—but it was okay.” I smile at him, “So...where have you been all day?”

“Out.” Lee finally said. And realizing he wasn’t going to say anymore--as I sat there waiting for him to, I respond, “Okay, so what’s up?”

Startled he looks at me. “What?” “There has to be something ‘up’ for me to talk to you now?”

“No. But…come on we haven’t ‘talked’ to each other in a really long time--longer than it has ever been. I just thought maybe you had something specifically you wanted to talk about--that’s all.”

Looking away he shrugs, “I don’t know--do you have something ‘specifically’ you want to say to me?” He finally said turning to look at me. “No.” “No?”

I don’t know why--but I didn’t want to have the whole ‘where is our friendship going’ conversation. I just for once--wanted to just enjoy his company--like we use to. Right now I just wanted him to be ‘my Lee’ again. “No not really--other than I’ve missed you.”

Letting out a laugh he responds, “For some reason I find that a little hard to believe.” “Well whatever it’s true--have you missed me? And if you say you haven’t--I am going to kill you.”

Laughing he says, “Well then I better not say anything.” Knowing he was only joking--trying to be funny and pretending I didn’t know that--I bring my hand to my heart, “Ah that hurts Lee. That really hurts.”

He lets out a laugh--and laughing with him I look at him smiling. It felt so good--this felt so good. I had missed this. And until now--sitting here with him--I didn’t know how much I had missed it.

I lay back on the bed--sitting up my on my elbow. Lee turns around facing me on the bed. “So…how are things with you and Paul?”

Looking in his eyes--knowing that he was being genuine. That he really wanted to talk to me about it—as my friend. I smile at him, “Things are great actually--well they have the potential to be I think.”

“Are you ready for something like that—a boyfriend I mean? I mean it is you

we are talking about here.”

Laughing with him--I hit his knee, “What is that supposed to mean?” “I don’t know--it’s you Kate. I don’t think you’ve actually ever had one--at least since I’ve known you. And I have known you…how long have I known you?” He pretends to think about it, “Since forever it seems.” He finally said smiling at me.

“Well people change--I’ve changed--or haven’t you noticed?” He looks down tugging on his pants, “I’ve noticed.” “Good--because I like the new me.”

“She’s okay,” he finally said turning to me--smiling.

“Just okay huh?” He smiles--and I watch his expression change as he suddenly looks down staring at my belly. Realizing my tank top had risen showing my belly button--I quickly pull it down.

“I’ll be right back,” I finally said getting up walking to the bathroom. I shut the door leaning against it.

Realizing my heart was pounding--I take a deep breath.

Why was I nervous?? Why did Lee looking at me--that small part of me no less…make me feel--well like this? Realizing I had goosebumps I rub my arms. I go to the sink splashing my face.

I had practically stripped in front of Paul and not once had I thought about--what he thought about it.

But now with Lee... I silently wished I did know.

Lee has always been so… I dunno ‘hidden’ when it comes to things like this--at least with me. And until now I had never gave it much thought. I mean until only recently had I started to really give my own self any attention. So what Lee thought about me--other than me being his ratty best-friend—never entered my mind. Until now…

“Kate.” Hearing Lee at the door I jump. “Yea?” “Are you coming out anytime soon?” “Yea—just a minute.” Pretending to groan--annoyed. I hear footsteps as he walked away from the door.

Looking in the mirror I let out a breath. What are you doing Kate? Snap out of it.

I turn around leaving