Johnny & I : The Island Daria Paus (fun books to read for adults txt) 📖

going to the next room, but the fact remained—soon, I’d be going away permanently. And no matter how much I wanted to stay with him, it wasn’t going to happen.

“I can’t live like this.”

A gasp slipped through my lips. His words, unexpected and raw, went straight into my heart. And even though I was pretty sure he wasn’t referring to his current health, I said it anyway. “It’s a fever, it’ll go away.” It was easier than having to think of the deeper meaning behind it.

He shook his head. I’d been right.

“It’s a fucking—"

I gulped, waiting for him to go on.

“It’s never going away—a fucking curse.”

“What is?”

“This—me . . .”

He looked up at me and the pain in his eyes as he stared into mine was more than I could handle.

“Baby.” I wrapped both arms around his trembling body and pulled him close. “It’s ok, you’ll be ok.” You have me, I wanted to add, but managed to shut my mouth before I made it worse.

He shifted, leaning his head against my chest, and murmured, “You make me feel better.”

I kissed the top is his head, softly running a hand through his hair.

“Try to rest now, I’ll be back soon.”

∞∞∞

When I came back, Johnny was sleeping. I placed the glass of water on the table and sat next to him. "Hey. How you feelin'?" I asked.

His eyes fluttered open and it seemed to take him a while to focus. He tried to smile. "Been better."

"I brought ice," I said as an answer, holding up a towel with ice wrapped inside. I brought it down on his forehead and he flinched from the sudden cold, but then he relaxed.

“What else can go wrong, huh?” he muttered. “My typical bad luck.”

“It’s not your fault.”

He scoffed, and the look he gave me spoke louder than the words that were left unspoken. It is. 

“You’ve been through too much, it’s normal to—" The look in his eyes cut me off, and a frown formed on my forehead. “What?”

He sighed. “This is nothing,” he said. “A few bruises and a fucking black eye.”

I could only stare at him, torn between annoyance and amazement. How could he pretend that what had happened was nothing? How could he act so unaffected? How was it possible that, despite everything that had happened to him, he still refused to accept the sympathy?

“You’re serious?”

He gave me a weak nod. “You don’t know my life. You don’t know what my ‘normal’ is. This—" he gestured with a trembling hand toward his body. “Is nothing.”

I wanted to protest, but somehow, I believed he didn’t just say it to make himself look brave. My chest tightened with emotion, and I forced myself to nod.

“You’re right, I don’t know what happened to you.” I let my free hand rest on his thigh. “But I’m sure it ain’t pretty.”

His eyes met mine, and he kept my gaze for a long time until he looked away, whispering an almost inaudible, “Yeah.”

“It will be ok.”

Not knowing what else to say, I focused on the whirlwind of thoughts in my head.

When all the ice had melted, I set the wet towel aside and placed a cold hand on his arm. "Do you think you can get up? I'd like to get you into bed."

He lazily raised an eyebrow and a shadow of a smile came over his lips. "I don't think I'm up to that kind of thing just yet.”

He knew what I meant, so I didn't feel the need to correct myself, but it made me blush.

"Would have been nice though,” he added. Noticing my embarrassed face, he smiled weakly up at me. Then he held out a trembling hand.

24

Demons

A sleepless night passed slowly. I couldn't bring myself to relax. My decision to stay on the island had not only risked Johnny's life, it had also messed up my mind. I’d never felt so scared, for my own safety, but mostly for his. I hadn’t heard a sound from the basement since we’d locked the creeps in, but just knowing that they were there, especially now when Johnny wouldn't be able to defend himself, sent chills down my spine.

I lay on my side, eyes wide open in the dark. If I took my eyes off Johnny for even a few seconds, I was sure something horrible would happen.

He shifted, mumbling something I didn't understand, and I jumped. My heart started to pound and I forced myself to suck in a few deep breaths to calm my nerves.

He spoke again. I drew myself up into a half-sitting position with one elbow supporting my weight.

Judging from the tangled cover at his waist, he’d stopped freezing, and I interpreted that as a good sign. The fact that the fever had stopped on a dangerously high degree and refused to lessen, worried me. I’d tried everything I knew of, but nothing seemed to have any effect on him at all.

Studying his moonlit features, feelings once again rushed over me. I felt so much at the same time, I didn't know what to do with it all. Even my inner voice seemed to be out of use. I closed my eyes trying to make sense of everything. He was the most amazing thing that had happened to me. A pure coincidence had changed my whole life, and at this moment I wasn't sure whether it was for the better, or for worse. I was so in love, my heart swelled and threatened to choke me, but I was also scared. Terrified of what would become of me once he was gone. That feeling alone was enough to make me question my sanity. Even though it sometimes felt like I’d known him forever, the truth was I’d only just met him. And he was not just some ordinary dude from the farm next door. He was Johnny Grey. The Johnny Grey. And here I was, contemplating how to survive without him. Had such words been uttered by anyone but