Deep River Promise Jackie Ashenden (best life changing books .txt) 📖

“Connor,” she said warningly.

“What?” His expression was the very essence of innocence. “You like him too, don’t you?”

Heat rose suddenly in her cheeks and she gritted her teeth, trying to stop it through sheer force of will. “Oh? And what makes you say that?” She tried for cool.

“Your face when you opened the door after we came home.”

Oh. Hell.

“He’s a nice guy, like you said.” She tried to sound exasperated and not as embarrassed as all get out. How annoying. The kid was fifteen. He shouldn’t be the one making his parent uncomfortable, surely? “What are you implying?”

“Oh, nothing.” Connor grinned suddenly and started to back away toward the exit. “Right. Gotta go see someone about…uh…something.”

The door banged shut behind him.

What was he up to? Probably something that would end up backfiring.

She went after him, going to the door and pulling it open, but when she stepped out onto the library’s porch, the road toward the town was empty. Connor had disappeared.

Astrid muttered a curse under her breath, turned, and went back inside. Whatever it was he was going to do, she’d no doubt find out eventually. And likely in the worst possible way, since that was how it went with kids.

Moving back over to the library cart, she picked up the stack of books and took them over to the shelves, slotting each book back in its place on the shelf as her thoughts turned to her son and that look he’d given her when he’d mentioned Damon.

You like him too.

And that was a problem. She did like him. She liked him a lot. Too much, probably. And Connor mentioning that he thought Damon needed them had only made things worse. Because now all she could think about was how he’d told her about his daughter and how he hadn’t wanted to talk about it. And then this morning at Silas’s, the way he’d looked at her…

She’d been hurt at his refusal, it was true, but it was also obvious that the problem wasn’t that he didn’t want her. It was…what? He’d made his refusal sound like he was protecting her, but was it really about her? Or was it more about himself? Did he not feel he could let himself have her? And if not, why? And why did Connor think that Damon needed them? Did he not have anyone?

Slowly, she put another book on the shelf, thinking, all the questions revolving in her head.

He had Silas and Zeke, and he’d had Cal. He had his mom in LA. But did he have anyone else? Perhaps he didn’t. He’d mentioned that telling her about his daughter was a secret that he hadn’t told anyone else. Why was that? Grief, yes, and pain, definitely. But not talking about her to anyone had to be such a terrible burden.

Yet…he’d told her, giving her a secret little piece of himself.

Emotion curled inside Astrid’s chest, heavy and aching.

He was a caring, protective man, and she could sense that he had a lot to give and that he wanted to give it. Yet she got the feeling that he was holding himself back.

You can’t keep giving without receiving.

It was true. Already he had given her a lot over the past few days, offering support and reassurance with her son, giving her passion and pleasure, rebuilding her confidence in herself as a woman. Yet she hadn’t given him anything in return, and she didn’t like that thought. Didn’t like it at all. She wanted to help him the way he’d helped her. And it didn’t have to be sex. It could just be the offer of a friendly ear and a shoulder to cry on. Reassurance that he wasn’t alone. Because she got the feeling that maybe he was. That behind his direct blue gaze lay something lonely and hungry…

Determination settled inside her.

Yes, that’s what she would do. She’d go to him tonight. He might not want to talk; he might only want sex and a night of distraction. Or he might just turn her away. But that didn’t matter and she couldn’t let her own issues get in the way. This was his last night here and this was her last opportunity, and she had to at least make the offer, let him know she was here if he wanted her to be.

It wasn’t much. But it was all she had.

Chapter 14

Damon spent the rest of that afternoon talking to Harry the survivalist in the man’s sprawling log cabin in the bush. Harry had a quad bike that he used to get in and out of town, since his house was a few miles away—he and Gwen liked the isolation—and he offered to take Damon out to look at the place. Damon agreed because Harry’s suggestions of wilderness survival skills was a good one and the guy wanted to give him a demonstration.

So he watched while Harry did various things like lighting a fire by striking sparks off his knife and onto a little pad of moss. Then building a shelter, before dragging Damon into the bush for a hunting demonstration. Afterward, since more rain had closed in, he and Harry sat on the porch while Gwen brought them herbal tea from herbs she’d dried herself.

He enjoyed himself far more than he’d expected to, mainly because it was an excellent distraction from thinking about Astrid.

Harry returned him to town much later, not to mention a bit the worse for wear after sharing with Damon some of his homemade whisky.

The Moose was full of people when he’d come into the bar, and he’d spoken to enough of the townspeople by now that they didn’t give him the stranger stare. Instead, they called his name in greeting, several beckoning him over to join in conversations or waving beers at him in invitation to share. Hell, it was almost as if he was one of them.

Deciding that although more alcohol was definitely a