Ragged Trousered Philanthropists by Robert Tressell (read novel full TXT) đ
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these committee men were human beings and not devils, they would have
been glad to mitigate it if they could have done so without hurting
themselves: but the truth was that they did not know what to do!
These are the `practicalâ men; the monopolists of intelligence, the
wise individuals who control the affairs of the world: it is in
accordance with the ideas of such men as these that the conditions of
human life are regulated.
This is the position:
It is admitted that never before in the history of mankind was it
possible to produce the necessaries of life in such abundance as at
present.
The management of the affairs of the world ïżœ the business of arranging
the conditions under which we live - is at present in the hands of
Practical, Level-headed, Sensible Business-men.
The result of their management is, that the majority of the people
find it a hard struggle to live. Large numbers exist in perpetual
poverty: a great many more periodically starve: many actually die of
want: hundreds destroy themselves rather than continue to live and
suffer.
When the Practical, Level-headed, Sensible Business-men are asked why
they do not remedy this state of things, they reply that they do not
know what to do! or, that it is impossible to remedy it!
And yet it is admitted that it is now possible to produce the
necessaries of life, in greater abundance than ever before!
With lavish kindness, the Supreme Being had provided all things
necessary for the existence and happiness of his creatures. To
suggest that it is not so is a blasphemous lie: it is to suggest that
the Supreme Being is not good or even just. On every side there is an
overflowing superfluity of the materials requisite for the production
of all the necessaries of life: from these materials everything we
need may be produced in abundance - by Work. Here was an army of
people lacking the things that may be made by work, standing idle.
Willing to work; clamouring to be allowed to work, and the Practical,
Level-headed, Sensible Business-men did not know what to do!
Of course, the real reason for the difficulty is that the raw
materials that were created for the use and benefit of all have been
stolen by a small number, who refuse to allow them to be used for the
purposes for which they were intended. This numerically insignificant
minority refused to allow the majority to work and produce the things
they need; and what work they do graciously permit to be done is not
done with the object of producing the necessaries of life for those
who work, but for the purpose of creating profit for their masters.
And then, strangest fact of all, the people who find it a hard
struggle to live, or who exist in dreadful poverty and sometimes
starve, instead of trying to understand the causes of their misery and
to find out a remedy themselves, spend all their time applauding the
Practical, Sensible, Level-headed Business-men, who bungle and
mismanage their affairs, and pay them huge salaries for doing so. Sir
Graball DâEncloseland, for instance, was a `Secretary of Stateâ and was
paid ïżœ5,000 a year. When he first got the job the wages were only a
beggarly ïżœ2,000, but as he found it impossible to exist on less than
ïżœ100 a week he decided to raise his salary to that amount; and the
foolish people who find it a hard struggle to live paid it willingly,
and when they saw the beautiful motor car and the lovely clothes and
jewellery he purchased for his wife with the money, and heard the
Great Speech he made - telling them how the shortage of everything was
caused by Over-production and Foreign Competition, they clapped their
hands and went frantic with admiration. Their only regret was that
there were no horses attached to the motor car, because if there had
been, they could have taken them out and harnessed themselves to it
instead.
Nothing delighted the childish minds of these poor people so much as
listening to or reading extracts from the speeches of such men as
these; so in order to amuse them, every now and then, in the midst of
all the wretchedness, some of the great statesmen made `great
speechesâ full of cunning phrases intended to hoodwink the fools who
had elected them. The very same week that Sir Graballâs salary was
increased to ïżœ5,000 a year, all the papers were full of a very fine
one that he made. They appeared with large headlines like this:
GREAT SPEECH BY SIR GRABALL DâENCLOSELAND
Brilliant Epigram!
None should have more than they need, whilst any have less than
they need!
The hypocrisy of such a saying in the mouth of a man who was drawing a
salary of five thousand pounds a year did not appear to occur to
anyone. On the contrary, the hired scribes of the capitalist Press
wrote columns of fulsome admiration of the miserable claptrap, and the
working men who had elected this man went into raptures over the
`Brilliant Epigramâ as if it were good to eat. They cut it out of the
papers and carried it about with them: they showed it to each other:
they read it and repeated it to each other: they wondered at it and
were delighted with it, grinning and gibbering at each other in the
exuberance of their imbecile enthusiasm.
The Distress Committee was not the only body pretending to `dealâ with
the poverty `problemâ: its efforts were supplemented by all the other
agencies already mentioned - the Labour Yard, the Rummage Sales, the
Organized Benevolence Society, and so on, to say nothing of a most
benevolent scheme originated by the management of Sweaterâs Emporium,
who announced in a letter that was published in the local Press that
they were prepared to employ fifty men for one week to carry sandwich
boards at one shilling - and a loaf of bread - per day.
They got the men; some unskilled labourers, a few old, worn out
artisans whom misery had deprived of the last vestiges of pride or
shame; a number of habitual drunkards and loafers, and a non-descript
lot of poor ragged old men - old soldiers and others of whom it would
be impossible to say what they had once been.
The procession of sandwich men was headed by the Semidrunk and the
Besotted Wretch, and each board was covered with a printed poster:
`Great Sale of Ladiesâ Blouses now Proceeding at Adam Sweaterâs
Emporium.â
Besides this artful scheme of Sweaterâs for getting a good
advertisement on the cheap, numerous other plans for providing
employment or alleviating the prevailing misery were put forward in
the columns of the local papers and at the various meetings that were
held. Any foolish, idiotic, useless suggestion was certain to receive
respectful attention; any crafty plan devised in his own interest or
for his own profit by one or other of the crew of sweaters and
landlords who controlled the town was sure to be approved of by the
other inhabitants of Mugsborough, the majority of whom were persons of
feeble intellect who not only allowed themselves to be robbed and
exploited by a few cunning scoundrels, but venerated and applauded
them for doing it.
The Brigandsâ Cave
One evening in the drawing-room at `The Caveâ there was a meeting of a
number of the `Shining Lightsâ to arrange the details of a Rummage
Sale, that was to be held in aid of the unemployed. It was an
informal affair, and while they were waiting for the other luminaries,
the early arrivals, Messrs Rushton, Didlum and Grinder, Mr Oyley
Sweater, the Borough Surveyor, Mr Wireman, the electrical engineer who
had been engaged as an `expertâ to examine and report on the Electric
Light Works, and two or three other gentlemen - all members of the
Band - took advantage of the opportunity to discuss a number of things
they were mutually interested in, which were to be dealt with at the
meeting of the Town Council the next day. First, there was the affair
of the untenanted Kiosk on the Grand Parade. This building belonged
to the Corporation, and `The Cosy Corner Refreshment Coy.â of which Mr
Grinder was the managing director, was thinking of hiring it to open
as a high-class refreshment lounge, provided the Corporation would
make certain alterations and let the place at a reasonable rent.
Another item which was to be discussed at the Council meeting was Mr
Sweaterâs generous offer to the Corporation respecting the new drain
connecting `The Caveâ with the Town Main.
The report of Mr Wireman, the electrical expert, was also to be dealt
with, and afterwards a resolution in favour of the purchase of the
Mugsborough Electric light and Installation Co. Ltd by the town, was
to be proposed.
In addition to these matters, several other items, including a
proposal by Mr Didlum for an important reform in the matter of
conducting the meetings of the Council, formed subjects for animated
conversation between the brigands and their host.
During this discussion other luminaries arrived, including several
ladies and the Rev. Mr Bosher, of the Church of the Whited Sepulchre.
The drawing-room of `The Caveâ was now elaborately furnished. A large
mirror in a richly gilt frame reached from the carved marble
mantelpiece to the cornice. A magnificent clock in an alabaster case
stood in the centre of the mantelpiece and was flanked by two
exquisitely painted and gilded vases of Dresden ware. The windows
were draped with costly hangings, the floor was covered with a
luxurious carpet and expensive rugs. Sumptuously upholstered couches
and easy chairs added to the comfort of the apartment, which was
warmed by the immense fire of coal and oak logs that blazed and
crackled in the grate.
The conversation now became general and at times highly philosophical
in character, although Mr Bosher did not take much part, being too
busily engaged gobbling up the biscuits and tea, and only occasionally
spluttering out a reply when a remark or question was directly
addressed to him.
This was Mr Grinderâs first visit at the house, and he expressed his
admiration of the manner in which the ceiling and the walls were
decorated, remarking that he had always liked this âere Japanese style.
Mr Bosher, with his mouth full of biscuit, mumbled that it was sweetly
pretty - charming - beautifully done - must have cost a lot of money.
`Hardly wot youâd call Japanese, though, is it?â observed Didlum,
looking round with the air of a connoisseur. `I should be inclined to
say it was rather more of the - er - Chinese or Egyptian.â
`Moorish,â explained Mr Sweater with a smile. `I got the idear at the
Paris Exhibition. Itâs simler to the decorations in the âHalambaraâ,
the palace of the Sultan of Morocco. That clock there is in the same
style.â
The case of the clock referred to - which stood on a table in a corner
of the room - was of fretwork, in the form of an Indian Mosque, with a
pointed dome and pinnacles. This was the case that Mary Linden had
sold to Didlum; the latter had had it stained a dark colour and
polished and further improved it by substituting a clock of more
suitable design than the one it originally held. Mr Sweater had
noticed it in Didlumâs window and, seeing that the design was similar
in character to the painted decorations on the ceiling and walls of
his drawing-room, had purchased it.
`I went to the Paris Exhibition meself,â said Grinder, when everyone
had admired the exquisite workmanship of
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