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282, 297, 309

Depressive Realism, delusional optimism and, 179–80

dermatologists, 239, 242–44

“deskercise,” 68

desk jockeys, treadmill, 68

desk workouts, 67–69

just standing in, 67

phone hookup for biceps curls in, 67

detached retinas, boxers prone to, 328

diabetes, 64, 92, 96, 229, 241

passport owners correlated with lower rates of, 91

sweet scent of, 294

Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders, 88

didgeridoo, snorer’s playing of, 261–62

neighbors prevented from snoring by, 262

diesel fuel, mood elevation experienced with aroma of, 299

diet, 13–28

AJ’s daily menu, 223–25, 224

bland, for lowering nefarious sex drive, 101–3

low-carb, high-protein, 92, 227–29

modified Mediterranean, 223–25

Paleo-Atkins type of, 225

partial list, 13

plant-based, 92

raw-food vegan, 225–27

raw meat, including internal organs, 38

sex-drive-booster, 105–6

Standard American, 92, 227

substitutions in, 225

sugar-free, 229–32

Vice, 13–16, 17

diet debate, 91–95

at AJ’s extended family dinners, 93–94

AJ’s pledge in, 225

low-carb, high-protein diet side of, 92–93, 227

plant-based diet side of, 92, 93–95, 227

raw food vs. Paleo diet, 225–29

digestive process, AJ’s thoughts of, 27

disease:

lapsarian view of, 142

mind-body issues in, 141–42

DNA testing, see genetic testing

doctors, most common reason for going to, 312

doggie bags, portion control with, 50

dog ownership, 150–52, 359–60

dogs, acupuncture on, 120

Doidge, Norman, 169

dolphins, enviable sleep system of, 257

“Don’t Walk” sign, doing pull-ups from, 65

door handles, germs on, 75–76

dopamine, 175

sexual desire stirred by, 107, 109

Douglas (friend), 126

drinking:

driving vs. walking after, 341

marriage as a curb on, 47

see also alcohol; booze; wine

drowning, while in bed, 336

Dr. Oz Show, 135, 264, 279, 331

Dr. Oz’s website, 59

drunk driving, risks of drunk walking compared with, 341

Duhigg, Charles, 245, 272–75

dumbbells:

lavender-colored vs. ten-pounder, 35

shopping bags as, 65

Duncan, David Ewing, 190

Durant, John, 37–43

becoming a “professional caveman” as goal of, 227–28

foods developed in last ten thousand years avoided by, 228

ideal girlfriend of, 228

as reformist caveman (cooks his meat), 38

dust mites, 92, 330

sleep lost over, 77

Dutch ash trees, Wi-Fi bad for, 185

dweebs, athletically inclined, 174

D-word, see death

earbuds, hearing loss induced by, 55

ear plugs, 366

eventual discomfort of, 57

see also noise

ears, 53–59

wear and tear of, 55

see also noise

Eat, Drink, and Be Healthy (Willett), 362

eating, 13–28

of the colors, 364

competitive, 60

of dirt, paper, glue, or clay, 131

distracted, father of, 21–22

80 percent prayer said in, 84, 156

fork size in, 23, 26

gaming yourself in, 231–32, 356, 363

by locavores, 362–63

for longevity, 24–26

low on food chain, 190

mindfulness attempted in, 22–24, 27

mindless, 21

pause points in, 363

plate size in, 22

portion-size challenge in, 17–22, 84–85, 355–56; see also portion control

role of chewing in, 23–24, 84, 355

of ugly vs. attractive animals, 170

watching Letterman vs. Leno while, 21

watching no TV while, 355

watching yourself while, 23–24, 356

see also diet; food; food reforms

eating disorders, 87–90

egonomics, present and future selves in, 48–50, 231

Eingorn, Alex, 142–47

on origins and principles of laughter clubs, 144

Einstein, Albert, 175

ejaculation, Taoist view of, 103

elbow-bump greetings, 77

electric-outlet safety, 336

elevator, taking stairs instead of, 64, 353

eleventh percentile, where AJ came out in counting backwards, 173

e-mails, effect of Tread-desk on, 69

Encyclopaedia Britannica:

AJ’s reading and retaining 2 percent of, 5, 6

on how the Fourth Earl gave us the first sandwich, 21–22

endocrine system, 182, 183–91

see also toxins

endometriosis, frequent orgasms and, 104

endorphins, 129

Energy, in Taoist sexology, 103

Entertainment Tonight, 155

epiphany, what to do while waiting for, 271

equations, brain fed with, 169

Equinox, 127

errands, running of, see running errands, literally

Esquire magazine, 51, 249, 345

AJ’s article on outsourcing his life in, 149

AJ’s browsing of, after his libido upgrade, 280, 285

AJ’s interview with George H. W. Bush in, 288

capri pants story in, 341

David Blaine interviewed for, 216–17

dolphin sleep system envisioned at meetings of, 257

low testosterone embarrassing for employee of, 11

men’s health symposium of, 279

sweating through shirt in running to, 65

syrupy peaches consumed by semisentient writer for, 22

Vergara interview in, 154–55

Esther, Queen, 199

estrogen, 283, 287

Europeans, slow-food eating by, 26

evolution:

barefoot running in, 205

dolphin sleep advantage as kind gift of, 257

healthy food ill-favored by, 15

how it missed the mark on pain, 116–17

Excruciating History of Dentistry, The (Wynbrandt), 196

Execusisers, 67, 68

Executive Health Enterprises (EHE), 10–11

exercise, 6, 89

aerobic, time allotted for, 1

antisnoring, 261

Band-Aid Removal Preference Dilemma in, 252–53

bingeing as aftereffect of, 33

of brain, 165–67

brainpower boosted by, 174

cardio vs. slow fitness, 158–59

in Caveman Workout, 36–44

in desk workouts, 67–69

disease risk cut down by, 32–33

feeling good as outcome of, 32

fidgeting, 353

hardly ever on Sabbath, 201

how much and what kind of, 33

laughing, 142–47

life span increased by, 32, 44–45, 46

motivation needed for, 250

neck, 318

neurobic, 170–71

in old age, 44–45

outwitting self into, 47–50

regularity needed for, 32, 33

sex as form of, 105

steady-state, 253

tapping your leg, 353

T-boosting with moderate levels of, 283

widows and widowers of, 278

see also gyms; working out; specific programs

Experimental Man (Duncan), 190

eyebrows, germs in, 77

eye charts:

with big E at top or bottom of, 329

Snellen, downloaded from Internet, 330

eye exams, 327–28

eyeglasses:

advantaged wearers of, 327

vision sharper without lenses in, 124

eyes, 325–33, 326

astonishing statistics on, 325

dark chocolate beneficial for, 14

diseases of, 327–28

Plato’s unkind words about, 293–94

tips for health of, 328

eyesight improvement, 329–31

chimpanzee help in, 283

cockiness for, 329

eye aerobics for, 329

video games for, 329, 330–31

F, problem recalling some words starting with, 172

face masks, 79–80, 220

facials, odd assortment of bodily fluids used for, 235–36

Fallahpour, Kamran, 171–73, 176

falls, trying to get into bed, 335

false confidence, things that improve with, 329

family meals, eating regimen at, 22–24, 26

farts, people seeking a new sound in, 131–33

fasting, see juice fast

fat, body:

brown vs. white, 210

sugars ending up as, 96

visceral vs. subcutaneous, 3

fat, dietary:

ancestor caveman’s short-run view of, 15–16

in diet debate, 92–94

in Paleo diet, 227–29

fate, outsmarting of, 148–49

fatigue, 259, 282

Federer, Roger, 163

feeling good, how exercise results in, 32–33

feet, 203–10, 204

average, lifetime distance walked by, 205

in barefoot running, 203–8, 204

webbed, Vibrams not advised for, 206

Feiffer, Jules, on Superman, 200

Ferris, Tim, 84, 211, 265, 361

fight-or-flight response, 55, 125

Fig Newtons, stomach’s mindless insistence on, 293

Fiji Water, purity of Cleveland water maligned by, 273

Finger, Paul, 328–29

Finger Fitness, 305–7, 309

how the world might change with, 307

invention of, 306–7

fingers, 303–10, 304

middle, naughty rep of, 306

thinking about bones of, 27

Fisch, Harry, 279–84

Clomid recommended by, 284

fish, mercury in, 190, 368

Fisher, Helen, 107

Fitbit, 108

fitness equipment, 98–99

fitness industry, marketing secrets of, 34

FitzGordon, Jonathan, 315–17

AJ’s walking appraised by, 315

on traditional posture advice, 316–17

walking demonstrated by, 316

Fixx, Jim:

fitness program and early death of, 29–31, 293

as only one data point, 32

flavonoids, 7, 89

Fletcher, Horace, pro-chewing grandfathered by, 24

flossing, 198

chimpanzee use of, 41

years added to life by, 195

Fonda, Jane, 158

food:

for Beverly Hills foreheads, 235

for the brain, 167

“Clark Kent,” 97

faux health, 51, 95

germs in, 77

healthy, fetishism for, 87–90

improved by headphones, 59

noisy snacks, 54, 362

organic,

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