Many poems dedicated to you... by Hannah Pate (a court of thorns and roses ebook free .txt) 📖
- Author: Hannah Pate
Book online «Many poems dedicated to you... by Hannah Pate (a court of thorns and roses ebook free .txt) 📖». Author Hannah Pate
Here is the first thing I ever wrote about him... When I actually believed everything he said... I now know that everything was a lie...
Maybe it was just a fantasy,
Maybe it was just a dream.
I will never know
But, what I do know is that I am hopelessly in love with you.
Maybe it was just a phase,
I am hoping it isn't.
Hopefully you won't leave me,
Hopefully you mean everything that you say.
You said you want to be with me forever,
Do you really?
I know I want you forever...
I love you...
You're my boy
I would never do anything to hurt you
I care so much about you that it hurts
It hurts to breathe
That's how hopelessly in love with you I am
Every time I get a message
My heart skips a beat
The air is taken from my lungs and I have to catch my breath every time
You make me feel this way My Boy
And I haven't felt this way in awhile
Not since the last one… Months ago
He hurt me
But you fixed me...
I'm not so broken now
I can finally say that I am no longer in love with him
Not since I met you
I fell for you even though I shouldn't have
You had such a way with words
You made me feel like I was the most important person in the world
I want to meet you
I really do
I want to hug, hold, and kiss you so bad
You make me happy Johnny...
Happier than I have ever been...
You're broken
I am too
But I think, with a bit of time, we can help fix each other
And make each other whole again
I will be here to hold your hand when times get tough
I will be here to hold you back when you feel the need to cut
I will be here always and forever to make sure you are happy
I want to keep you happy for as long as I can.
I love you…
I hope you feel the same...
Dear You...Here's a story, you have never heard. It's the story on you and me.
It wasn't just the way your hands shook as you messaged me back, nor was it the way you could never look me in the eyes while speaking to me.It was the way you coughed while you took drag after drag on that cigarette that blunt, that whatever that was in your hand. I admired the way you still talked to me even when you were half stoned, even when you were so high that you couldn't see straight. I love that about you, no matter what you always talked to me. Even when your family was being loud and annoying you always found the time to say something to me, no matter what it was. We haven't done that in over a month. I haven't heard your actual voice since may, and it kills me, I would have heard it in June, yet I was in school and couldn't answer the call, I still believe that if I answered that call, you would have never gone to the place you did, you would have never had to leave the boys home, you would still have your tablet at your disposal, you wouldn't have wanted to go to the hospital... and I probably wouldn’t blame myself for you jumping out of that window. We had a fight, you left super pissed at me and I didn't try and stop you from leaving... I apologized multiple times for yelling at you that day, the last thing you said that day was, "I love you, bye" I knew something was wrong, I should have tried to make you stay a bit longer, maybe then you wouldn't have jumped, and maybe I wouldn't be writing this speech, explaining myself and how I think it's my fault, you didn't message me for a week, I was so worried, I texted saying I was having a mental breakdown and all that you said was, "Don't, please" a week later, I cried, I told you that you scared me, you asked why, I said I thought something bad happened, and that is when you told me about you jumping out of that window... I cried even harder as I wrote back, I was panicking, yet you were so calm, you kept telling me you were okay, and I believed it, every time you said it. You calmed me down so much, you were so sweet, you said I love you twice in one message and I think my heart melted reading it. I love you... and I always will...
Addicted...
This is dedicated to you
Yes, you
Once again
You are like nicotine
And I’m the addict
Whenever you come around, I get more and more addicted
I smoke you every time
And it just keeps getting worse
You left me, when I needed you most of all
You were gone for 2 weeks before messaging me to end it
Saying you can’t handle it
Yet here I am, still addicted to you
And I think I always will be
LifeI loved the way you looked at me
The way your eyes lit up every time you saw me
But now, they don't have that same spark in them like they once did
They don't have that spark anymore
They look dull and lifeless looking at me through the phone
Like you are haunted and you are just breathing
Like you don't have any control over you own body
You are just living, waiting for the day you die like life is such a bad thing
When it only wants to be here and alive
In a soul that doesn't want to live
Us as suicidal kids, we don't want to live
But our life does
And when we end it, it's just over
In reality, nobody will miss your life, but they will miss you
You as a person
And if that doesn't sadden you, nothing will.
You...Why? Just why? Why do you make me feel this way? You make me feel so important, you make me feel loved, yet you end it, just like that? You are every wish I have ever had, everything I have ever wanted and I can't let you go... I keep taking drag after drag of you, and I can't stop, I just can't... I love you... You say you love me, even when you left, you keep saying I love you to me, and I say it back, yet sometimes, I don't think you mean it.
Heartbroken..
You messaged me today
When I saw you active, my heart died a bit
Because you are alive
When I thought you weren't
But there you were
I have no idea where you were
I asked if you hated me
You said no
And that we needed to talk
So we talked, yet I am still sad about you
I didn't remember our would have been 3 months on the 16th
I think that is a sign that I am letting you go
And hopefully that is what this is
Because I can't go on loving someone who doesn't love me back
Last time you messaged you said you were gonna come back to me
Yet, when you messaged today you said you weren't ready
That you couldn't come back
And I took that as you are never coming back
Hopefully we can still be friend's
Hopefully you'll message me every once in awhile
Just to ask how I'm doing
Or to tell me how you are doing
I still want that at least
And if it doesn't happen?
Then it's your loss
You say that you don't think you are right for me
Yet, you are the only one I want
Not much anymore since what happened before
But when I see your name on my screen my heart skips a beat
So I know you will still have that effect on me
You say you aren't the right one when you are
I can see a future with you
But, obviously you can't see that like I can
And that makes me sad...
Because I truly love you...
Yet you don't love me the same way...
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