Streams of thoughts... by L. R. Garrison (best e book reader .txt) 📖

is not us

It is only they and I


We are gone

We has left me all alone

It is not we

It is only one and that is I


We are not together anymore

We are they

They are each other

We does not include I

Half of we are now with them and I am the only part left of we


We is not I

We are they

They are not us

It is only them

And we is only me


September 05, 2006
What about??


What about me?

I want to change so many wrongs

I am one person

I want to help so many people who need it

I am only one person

I cannot even help myself

What about me?


I am invisible

Do you see me, my dreams, my love?

My soul wants to do so much

Just do it they say

I cannot


What about me?

What about the things I love

They are always taken away from me

So many lies, promises, deaths

Those that are forgotten and those that forget

I cry for my pain and the pain of others

Suicide, murder, rape, abuse, neglect


What about me?

What is inside of me?

Alone

Empty

Worthless

Potential, but circumstances, useless

I cannot help anyone, I cannot help myself


What about me?

Family

Substance, narcotic abuse, disunity

I cannot prevent

The cycle continues with or without my presence


What about me?

I need assistance

It is my future I should be able to sustain myself

Words do not help

Actions do and there are none


Future, aspiring, want to be

How?

No means

Just do it

Words do not help

Actions do


What about me?

Support, none

Friends, Family, People

Most of you are fake

Others do not like me

Some do not care

Few believe in me


This world

Depression, violence, war, epidemics, poor, starvation

I want to do something

Where is love, peace, liberty, are they just concepts

Scream

I wish I could take their pain away, suffering

What about them, us?


My pain, suffering, life, my thoughts

What about me?


June 6, 2006
My Addiction


Ambivalence: Torn by emotions, I am left confounded inasmuch as alone.

In deference to your request, I try to be compliant to your wishes.

My emotions are so capricious that I sometimes feel like I am being castigated.

Your presence always made me ebullient to the point in which it was hard to express.

Now my actions tend to belie my feelings and when I am around you I become enervated.

I may even appear to seem boorish in an attempt to equivocate how I still and truly feel.

Our time together was an ephemeral one

And I wish I could assuage this feeling inside.

When I try to alleviate things between us, it only seems to exacerbate the situation.

Some may flout me.

Maybe I have been acting fatuous, but I cannot gainsay the truth.


December 17, 2004
Another Winters Night


Cold-

I lie in this bed consistently

Trying to go asleep

It seems like the nights grow endless

I wrap myself with cover, I am too hot

I unwrap myself, I am too cold

Constantly trying to become comfortable

The thought is euphoria, the actual is futile.


Alone-

The chill creeps upon me

False hopes, wishful thinking

My eyes growing watery

The chill is my friend. The cold is my friend

The ice is my life, beautiful to look at

Fun to play with during the day, but like I, as night approach becomes alone as well

Expectance, dreams, hopes, aspirations or

Wants, desires, lusts and need.


Snow-

My thoughts become reminiscent

Tossing and turning, I grow cold

Closing my eyes grants despair an invitation

Theres no need nor lust, want or desire

And the cold that covers me, is it really due to the season

As time continues to progress, I grow tired, but not sleepy

In bed I embrace the darkness, hug my covers and allow cold to lie next to me gradually kissing my lips

My eyes slowly begin to close

The phone never rings.


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Publication Date: 10-19-2009

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