Lovely Desire by Breanna Davis (self help books to read TXT) 📖

.," he seemed to have chose his words carefully.
I stared at him, unblinking.
Was that how our relationship was going to end? Once he bored of me, he was going to throw me away like he did poor Caroline. My face scrunched up in distaste.
"That's horrible, Trent. If the love just died like that, that means you never truly loved her."
He shook his head at me. "You're wrong. I did love her. I loved her very much."
I rolled my eyes. "That can't be true! It was not true love. True love doesn't end like that." I argued.
Trent smirked at me. "Who said the love was true? I just said I loved her - I never said she was my true love."
I contemplated that in my head and shrugged. "I guess you're right on that one, but still - if you love someone - in any type of way - it just never dies like that."
He thought about that for a second, before he said in a sweet, melodic voice,
"Doubt thou the stars are fire;
Doubt that the sun doth move;
Doubt truth to be a liar;
But never doubt I love."
I was sure I was staring at him with a dumbfounded look because he then said, "Hamlet by Shakespeare, Act II , Scene II. It means - well , at least to me - , that you'll know you're in love, love cannot disguise itself. It's way too potent to not be recognized."
"Shakespeare," I mumbled softly. "How do you understand it? When I had to read Romeo and Juliet for one of my Lit classes, it was hard to understand. I could tell Romeo had an undeniable love for Juliet, but Shakespeare's choice of words just give me a headache." I said wryly.
Trent chuckled. "Next time, actually try to understand the scene instead of the words." He said easily.
I nodded slowly, committing that to my mind. "But, back to the story," he said and took a breath.
"As me and Caroline was growing up, she was always the sweetest little thing. Loved helping people, loved treating people nicely . . . But as the years flew by, she became so controlling and so different. I couldn't even recognize my poor Caroline anymore. I loved her, so I tried to accept her as a person, still. People changed all of the time, right? But there was another girl . . . And she was taking up all the space in my mind. Soon, I never paid Caroline any attention and she realized that. She didn't like that. I told her about the girl that I soon fell in love with. She called me stupid, foolish, and said we would never be so I needed to get over her," He shook his head, and I saw a brief flash of hurt wash across his face. "I believed her."
My eyes bubbled with tears from his story. I don't know why, but I felt truly affected from his tale. I blinked away the tears quickly and looked at Trent. He was staring hard at the ceiling, his lips set in a deep frown. His arms were crossed and he was completely still. He didn't blink nor move a inch. I couldn't imagine what was going through his head at this point. I cleared my throat and spoke.
"Why couldn't you guys be together?" I asked in a shaky voice.
When Trent heard my voice, he unfroze and looked at me through deep, grey, smoldering eyes. He licked his lips before he said, "Because she only existed in my dreams - well, that's what I thought."
A gasp escaped my lips. I waited for Trent to explain what he meant, but he never did. Instead he turned and walked out the room. A few seconds later, the bell rung, dismissing the entire school. ***
I looked for Trent afterwards, but couldn’t find him anywhere. I thought about calling him, but chickened out after three attempts. So, instead I went to my locker and got my messenger bag before beginning my walk home, since I missed my ride with Leo. I would’ve just called him to come and pick me up, but I wanted time to think anyway.
I trudged out into the cold air. Some houses across the street already started putting up Christmas decorations, others were dull and broken down, but all pretty in their own way. My attempt to distract my mind lasted a few seconds before my mind went back to Trent and his story.
I was still wondering why the name Caroline sounded so familiar. The name was pulling at me, telling me it was so important to know . . . But yet it still didn’t come to me. But I did know that she was Trent’s fiancée – ex fiancée – and they grew up together. She supposedly turned evil and Trent tried to accept her, but another girl came along. A girl he said that he thought only starred in his dreams? So basically he found his dream girl.
So why was he with me? Why isn’t he with this girl?
I pondered that in my head the rest of my walk home. By the time I got inside my house I had a huge headache from all the thinking I’ve been doing. Went in the bathroom and took three ibuprofens before falling on my bed and immediately falling asleep.
Then, I had another dream.

***

The sky was gray, the clouds were barely visible, but yet it was still beautiful outside. I was surrounded by thick, high grass. It was kind of suffocating, but I was too curious about why I was here the pay attention. When I looked down, I was still in my clothes from this morning, but my hair was curled and longer than I remembered. I wished I had a mirror to see how I looked, but a few seconds later, I forgot about my hair and started trudging through the grass, looking around for anything that could explain why I was here and how I got here.
I was still walking when I heard a rough, low voice. I froze, looked around, searching for the answer of that voice.

"You can't leave, sir." The rough, low voice said.

I was curious to whom and what the voice was talking about. I tried to get on my tippy toes to see over the high grass, but it was simply impossible. It was like I was walking through the Amazon jungle. It was never ending.

"I have to. I just can't stay here and pretend." Another voice said in a broken voice. The voice sounded a tad bit familiar, but I couldn't have recognized it. I was in some type of forest far from anybody that I knew. I still didn't understand how I got here.

            I still walked forward, following the voices. My breath was coming out in puffs, and I felt like I was on the brink of hyperventilation. But still, I marched ahead.

"I'm sure the dreams will go away. Even if they don't - why ruin your reality for just a dream? I'm sorry, sir. Make me understand."

            I finally made it to the source of the voices and I was shocked when I saw Trent and another bronze skinned man.

The man was unnaturally tall with thick brown crown of curly hair. His muscles was huge - even bigger than Trent's. Even from where I was standing, I could clearly see the mass of veins running through his muscles and every time he moved his arms, his muscles flexed and even seemed to get bigger. What really had me taken aback was that his eyes were a bright, menacing red and stood out against the whites of his eyes. He was still a beautiful man despite his very inhuman and exotic characteristics.

Trent looked like a tiny thing of a man standing next of the beastly guy. His dark hair was longer than I remembered and fell down his face. He swiped it behind his ear every now and again. But even with his long hair, he still looked beautiful. Absolutely stunning. And despite the fact that he looked small compared to the another man, his muscles were bigger than the average man and huger.

            Trent was sitting on a stump of a tree, his face covered in his massive hands. He seemed to be shaking, and sobbing. I had to look twice to actually believe it. Trent was crying? What had him so sad? I felt an overwhelming feeling to caress his face until I saw that beautiful pearly white smile of his. But I fought the feeling and stayed where I stood.

Trent spoke again, but didn't remove his hands from his face.

"Can you imagine seeing the most beautiful girl you ever seen just dancing around in your head? You can't touch her, but you can see, smell, and even taste her. It will drive a man absolutely mad. And it isn't like I just dreamt about her once. I dream about her every damn day and night. Sometimes I hallucinate as I'm walking and I see her running towards me. And every time I reach for her, she just vanishes." He chokes and lets out an heart wrenching sob.

I couldn't take it. I wanted to be in his arms and comfort him and tell him everything was going to be ok. I wanted to kiss away all his tears. I just couldn't bare all of his sadness. I just couldn't. I felt my eyes fill with its own tears.

            That's when I reached out to try and touch him.

            The sky seemed to have rippled as if I poked at a container of jell-o. In pure shock, I jumped back and nearly let out a scream. I bit my tongue, and tried to calm down my hyperactive heart by putting my hand over it.

That's when I remembered. This was a dream. I had fallen asleep and this was all a dream. So none of this could be true? It was just a figment of my imagination, but that didn't mean I didn't want to wake up any time soon. Even though I knew it was dream, I was still intrigued with how broad of an imagination my brain truly had.

"I can only imagine how troubling that would feel." The beastly guy murmured thoughtfully.

Trent let out another sob before he finally looked up.

            His grey eyes were surrounded by a ring of red from all the crying he'd been doing. His eyes were puffy and wet. He wiped at his eyes, clearly embarrassed to have been crying so thoroughly in front of this man.

"You have no idea. I can't stand it, Lucian. Just think about it. I want you to truly understand where I'm coming from so that when I'm gone, you can back me up entirely. Imagine Elizabeth was always in your dreams. But yet - you have never seen her before, have no clue where she came from, how'd she got into your head. But you don't want her to disappear because you feel so compelled to her. She haunts your dreams and you . . .  find yourself falling for something that isn't real. But you're in love and you have no idea what to do," Trent flung his hands in the air in exasperation. "Imagine months of dreaming about her . . . it's time for me to leave and see if she's real."

The guy - who's name must have been Lucian - shook his head. "You can't. What if she isn't real? You'd given up your turn to rule to look for a girl who doesn't even exist! You'd be the laughing stock of the town, sir! Think before you act. Isn't that what you've been teaching us all this time? You can't take risk when