My Secret by Breanna Davis (elon musk reading list txt) 📖

I was shaking with tears and sorrow. My chest hurt and I wanted to vomit. I was glad that Blaze was comforting me. We use to be close, and I'm glad he was turning back into his regular self.
"Blaze?"
"Huh?"
"Are you going to dump Liz?"
Blaze's body shook with laughter.
"I guess."
I rolled my eyes.
"That isn't very nice."
Blaze chuckled.
"She isn't the one for me. Just a sex toy."
I shook my head and snuggled into his lap.
"Well, I'm going to get some sleep," I said and closed my eyes.


I woke up to a shade of the sun creeping into my room. My eyes fluttered open and I sat up straight. I groaned as I realized Jake wasn't with me, but dead.
I collapse back into the pillow and touched the necklace that I didn't take off. The letter 'A' necklace. I sighed and fingered the letter.
"I'll never forget you Jake. Not a year from now, a decade from now, or even a century from now, I'll always remember you."
I rolled on my sides as tears started to pour from my eyes. I gripped my chest and let the tears drip from my eyes and onto the pillow.
A knock on the door made me jump and wipe my eyes.
"Hey, sweetie." My mom said from the door.
"Your dad left for a business trip in New York, he'll be back in a week." She sat on my bed next to me and started to rub my back.
"I'm sorry about what happened to Jake," she began and looked into my eyes.
"This situation is going to scar you for life." She looked like she had more to say but held it back.
"You have something else to say," It was a statement not a question.
My mother looked down then back into my eyes.
"I promised that Jake would be the one to tell you."
"But, he can't! He's dead!" I sat up straight in the bed and shook my mother's shoulders.
"He isn't dead. That's all I can tell you." She removed my hand from her shoulders and left my room.
I stared at the spot in which my mother was sitting in.
Jake wasn’t dead?
I felt my heart skip a beat and I touched the necklace that lay in between my breasts.
Jake isn’t dead!
I felt happy tears stream down my face. Hopefully, Dr. Clark didn’t tell Jake about what I had said. I was hurt and sad. I hoped Dr. Clark understood why I said those words. I sent a prayer up to God before I went to gather my clothes.
School wouldn’t be as fun with Jake by my side laughing and smiling and holding my hand. I sighed out loud and went to go fix my hair.
A moment later I was dressed, with no makeup, and no jewelry accept the necklace Jake gave me.
New hope drained into me as I hopped in my car, avoiding my parents Iris, and Blaze, avoiding breakfast and my life at home. I just wanted to get to school.
I turn the keys and my car roared to life. I pulled out of my drive way and started for school.
I thought about Jake at the hospital. He was probably dying a little bit more every minute.
My hand tightened on the steering wheel at the thought.
What if he really didn’t want to see me? What if he wanted to die than see my face again? I shook my head. He loved me. He would want to see me before he died.
I drove into the school parking lot moments later. The red bricks that the school was made of didn’t feel so homey anymore. The flag that waved from it didn’t remind me of home, at all. Nothing felt right without Jake’s arms wrapped around my waist leading me down the hall way. Or maybe, he might be kissing me until we both get so turned on we go have sex in the bathroom.
Tears blurred my vision as I remembered the day I lost my virginity to Jake.
“I promise I won’t hurt you, Me-me. I love you.”
We were propped up against the wall in the hallway. I was supposed to be at track practice and he was supposed to be at basketball practice.
I shook my head and looked into his eyes.
“What if after I give you what you want, you dump me and leave me. I can’t handle that, Jake. I can’t handle living without you,” I looked down as tears filled my eyes.
Jake tilted my chin up with his finger.
“Amelia, you know I would never do that to you. Have I ever betrayed you in anyway?”
I thought that over. He never did betray me. He always stood by me even when I was wrong. He never let me down.
I shook my head. “No,”
I pressed my lips to his and passion and lust filled me. I knotted my fingers in his dark hair and deepened the kiss. He picked me up and I wrapped my legs around his waist. He backed up into the nearest bathroom and took away my virginity.
I remembered the pain, and glad there wasn’t any blood. I remembered the awkward silence when we were done. I remembered Jake kissing me lovingly on the lips and never leaving my side.

Tears fell from my eyes and I wiped them away. I got out my car and started walking towards the school. I felt a hand touch my shoulder and I thought it was Jake.
I turned around and found Pamela staring at me with puffy red eyes.
I gasped.
She threw her around me and hugged me tight.
“I miss him so, so, so much!” she sobbed into my shirt.
I wrapped my arms around her.
“He isn’t dead,” I whispered.
She looked into my eyes and she smiled.
“He isn’t dead?” I shook my head.
“B-but all that blood . . .” she trailed off.
“I know. He isn’t dead . . . yet.”
She looked down and then she grabbed my hand.
“Let’s go to Biology,” she said and tugged me towards school.
Pamela had dark silky hair, that had red highlights flowing through them. She had a nose piercing that was in the shape of a heart. She had a petite body and like pixie small.
“Pamela, you want to go to Biology?” I ask.
“I’ll do anything so I won’t think about Jake laying in a hospital bed . . . dead,” she whispered the last words and tears filled her eyes. She wiped it away and tugged on my arm harder.
I understood why Jake being sick brought so much pain to Pamela. They knew each other for a long time. Not as long as I knew Jake, but almost.
I looked down at Pamela with pity and said nothing more.

I was jotting down notes in Algebra when I was called to the front office. I sighed and picked up my books and headed for the front office.
What did they want?
I started biting my nails, nervous.
Was I in trouble? Did they find some footage of me and Jake being intimate?
I shuddered at the possibilities. My dad would kill me if he found out.

I stepped into the front office. A cold breeze blew across my back and I shivered. I looked down at my hands and realized they were shaking. I stuff them in my pockets and walked all the way into the office.
I first saw only the lady that sat at the desk but as I came closer in I realized Jake’s dad was there along with his mother.
I cleared my throat and faced them.
“So, what’s up?” I asked, raising my eyebrow.
Jake’s dad smiled and stepped in front of me.
“I told Jake what you said,” he began. I frowned. “And since you were so mad he wishes to see you.”
I smiled.
“Really?” I looked over at Jake’s mom for confirmation and she nodded.
I threw myself into Jake’s dad arms and looked up at him through tears.
“Thank you,” I said sincerely.
He smiled back at me and released me.
He grabbed his wife hand. “Lets go.”
I was confused.
“Now?”
He nodded, immediately. Jake isn’t doing so well.”
I went frigid but nodded and followed him out into the parking lot.
I slid into their car and tried to focus on the road instead of them. Jake’s mom surprised me by sitting in the back with me. She wrapped her arms around me and held me tight to her tiny body.
Jake’s mom had pitched black hair like him. She had light, light blue eyes, and she was beautiful. She looked like a queen.
Jake’s dad had dark brown hair with Jake’s almost lime green eyes. He looked a lot like Jake. He could’ve been his twin if he had the pitched black hair.
I laid my head on Mrs. Clark shoulder and closed my eyes. Jake was going to die. He wanted to see me before he did. A tear fell down my face even though my eyes were closed. I wiped it away and opened my eyes. Mrs. Clark was looking at me with a worried expression on her face.
“What?” I asked and put my face in a pout.
“Your sadness is literally screaming at me,” she said and looked down.
I knew she saw the confused expression on my face and said, “I wish I can explain . . .” She looked out the window and we didn’t talk the rest of the ride.

“Down the hall, turn right then a left,” Mr. Clark was saying to me. I nodded and followed his direction towards Jake’s room.
I ran down the hall, following Mr. Clark’s directions. I stopped at the door that said room 104.
I turned the knob and stepped slowly into the room. I stopped in the middle of the room when I heard coughing.
“Me-me,” said a familiar voice.
I looked up and saw a stranger that was pale and had the same voice and eyes as Jake.
“Jake,” I realized.
I walked towards his bed and sat down on a chair by his bed.
“You look horrible.” I commented.
He flashed a smile.
“I feel like utter shit.” He laughed and I smiled.
“I wish you can get the hell out of here and bang me.” I teased.
He chuckled.
“I wish too, Me-me. But, that isn’t going to happen.” He said and coughed again.
I looked away. “Don’t say that,” I said not looking at him. “I don’t want you to die.” I said and a tear slid down my cheek.
“It’s going to be ok, Amelia.” He said and rubbed my arm. I looked back him and he was smiling.
“I’m really going to miss that smile.” I sighed.
“Do not worry, Amelia.” He said firmly.
“How can I not?”
“Because, you are strong. You can go on without me.”
I shook my head.
“I cannot!” I shouted.
He wasn’t even trying to live. He was trying to die. He didn’t care that he was taking himself away from me! He only cared if I was ok. Like, who the fuck cares about me right now? He’s in the fucking hospital!
“You’re going to have to. Move on, Amelia. Do it, for me.”
I shook my head.
“No, Jake! I can’t! I love you. You are my life. How could I even move on without you? I will love no one like how I love you.”
A tear slid down his face and I wanted to comfort him.
I