When A Bully Falls In Love by Valerie Sax (good books to read for women TXT) 📖

Chapter 13: Self Realization

After Matt left, I settled myself on the chair next to my study table thinking, about the last words he left on my door.

How could Matt expect me to forgive him? He knew Xander is the biggest bully who likes to trouble other people. How could I forget he was the one who made my life hell since the day I landed in this college. First, he mocked me in front of everyone, and then he kept that bucket.

"Ahhh... I hate him...." I screamed, throwing things on the walls.

Why should I forgive him? He doesn't deserve my forgiveness.

I looked in the mirror with a disgusted expression-filled my face with Xander's thought.

"Is he really so bad for me?" I asked myself.

I took a sharp breath, trying to release my thoughts of hating him.

Hating someone is easy; the hardest thing is to forgive.

I smiled when my mother's thought popped into my mind. Even after her death, her thoughts used to help me in my difficult times.

 

 

But whatever Matt told me, is it true?

Did Xander save me? But why? What does he want from me?

Why was he sitting next to me in the hospital?

I settled myself on the corner of the bed, pulling my hair back of my head.

"A hot shower might help," I purred.

I took out my clothes and walked into the shower.

The water drops were hot enough to relax my strained body.

My mind was dropping the bomb of him being a selfish brat, while my heart was not ready to accept it. 

As the hot water covered my whole body, I felt my emotions changed into something else.

Whenever I closed my eyes to rethink every moment, my heart got stuck in his piercing eyes.

The closest I felt his presence when I held his hand into mine.

How could I feel his warmth on my head? 

The way he extended his hand to help me when Zareena pushed me.

I was lost and confused in between my mind and heart thoughts.

I think this hot shower made me think more about him in another way.

I cupped my boobs pinched, my nipples, and trailed my fingers to every part of my body. 

Stop Aoife... Stop.... thinking of him like this. You hate him remember?

A soft whimper came out when I touched my finger on my sensitive part.

A gooey rubbing and all I feel was my juices started to come down.

While I was lost, making myself happy; about to reach my climax.

Someone banged my door.

"Great...," I snorted. And rolled my eyes.

"Who is this," I peaked from my bathroom door.

"Open the door. It's Clara," Another voice came from the other side of the door.

"Coming wait," I answered.

I literally stomped my feet as I wore my bathrobe.

I opened the door, and here she comes.

"I am sorry, dear. I didn't know anything. I got to know through Miss Agnes." She screamed.

"It's ok... " I replied.

"How are you now?"

"Good... Can we go out?" I wanted to go out as my mind would burst with Xander's thought.

"What? Are you sure? You don't want to take rest?" She answered.

"No, I am tired of taking rest and bored," I answered.

We decided to meet after college. I was resting in my dorm and waited for her to finish her class.

It's still three hours, what should I do?

I ate some snacks and started reading a book.

Suddenly my phone buzzed.

"Who is this?" I said.

"Hey, it Caleb. Can you give me some money today? I really need to give them. Otherwise, they will give my bed to another person." His voice was distorted with stress.

"Caleb, how are you? I don't have money right now."

"You promised me." He snorted.

"Ok, let me see," I answered while scanning my bag.

"Caleb, how am I going to send you money? I have a little cash,"

I answered while counting my savings.

This was my savings from my editorial work.

Strange, I used to edit articles and stories for people. They use to give me peanuts while they get hundreds of dollars to publish their article. It never bothered me as soon as I get my peanuts.

But today, my brother wants money, and it made me feel bad for not asking more for my work.

"I will come to collect it. Just tell me you have the money."

He gruffed.

"What? Are you in town? Why didn't you told me? Where are you?"

I asked lots of questions.

"Aoife, I will take the money and leave."

He said.

"You are not going to meet me? You don't want to meet your sister?"

I was getting emotional.

"Aoife, Just tell me the address, damn it," He screamed.

I was emotionally drained; I didn't notice he was getting angry.

"I can meet you in the city mall there will give you money," I answered.

I was happy with the thought of meeting Caleb after six months. 

He agreed and hung up the phone.

******

After Clara finished her lectures, she came to pick me.

It's almost evening. The sunlight hid in the winter clouds. Although it's the beginning of the cold weather, it feels good.

"Thanks for taking me out," I said while coming out in the mall parking.

"Anything for you, babe," Clara answered.

I tried to avoid her conversation about who threw me in the pool.

And luckily, she understood; I was not ready to talk about it.

We entered the mall and got ourselves busy in window shopping.

Although I wanted to make myself busy in my surroundings, my mind was stuck in my bathroom scene.

What was I thinking? I felt ashamed of myself to touch and feel my body by thinking of him. How could I think of him like this?

Ahhh ...

Again my mind reminded the same scene. I am literally getting mad.

"What's the date today?" I questioned.

She looked confused; why am I asking date?

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