Flowers by Nichole Hall (best life changing books txt) 📖

pulling out weeds near her vegetables. She glances at me, with the pity look before returning to her side of the garden.

“Honey, you can’t make something stay if they don’t want to.”

Words of the wise woman. She isn’t just talking about flowers anymore. For so long, I was convinced my mother was coming back. She never showed signs of depression or an illness, my father and her got along well. Sure, they had their fights, but so does every couple, so divorce was out of the question. There really wasn’t any warning either. One morning I woke up and she was gone. Bags packed, bedroom nearly empty with a few remaining clothes in the closet that belonged to my father, and no note. Nothing. I guess the worse part about her leaving was that right there. She never gave a reason. So I held unto to hope, to a fighting chance that she would come back and want me, but she didn’t. Once a month a check is sent with the old address printed on it, with no postal stamp on the envelope leading to any clues of where she might be. Just a check addressed to me, almost like child support. I give grandma the check every month, too hurt to touch that shame money. 

“Go get some lemonade to soothe your soul, honey.”

Somehow, lemonade can’t make up for the fact that my mother never wanted me or that she wasn’t there to help all of us deal with my father’s death. My grandma was already deep into her growing age, then my father died and she took it hard. A few days later, I’m at her doorstep with bags full of clothes. I didn’t cry when it happened. In fact it took almost two weeks for the pain to really hit. And it hit, hard and long. 

After the glass of lemonade and a cold shower I feel like Mandy, anxious and pacing all over the bedroom. No use in denying that grandma opened a can of bad memories that will forever haunt me. 

In some sort of attempt to clear my head I call Mandy, hoping for a distraction. Another description of Monica Potter’s life sounds better right now than anything else.

“Helloooo?”

“Hey.” Pause. I hear some shuffling and doors closing in the background. “What are you doing?”

“Getting ready for Clarissa’s pool party.”

“Oh.” Mandy keeps in loop with all the neighboring parties and town gossip as I try and stay out of the limelight of things. So it isn’t unusual for her to go to these things without me. Well, so much for a distraction.

“Oh? Don’t tell me you aren’t ready yet. Our ride will be here in like five minutes to get me and then we are coming to get you!” Mandy practically screams.

“Our ride? Get me?” I sound like a blubbering idiot.

“You forgot.” She sighs. “I told you, like last week when you were crying over your dead flowers.”

“I wasn’t crying.”

“Whatever. Get ready, like now.”

“Okay, okay. But, who’s picking us up.”

I can feel the evil smile from Mandy before she even speaks.

“That’s for me to know.” Click.

Well then. 

My choices are limited in the bathing suit department. Really there are only two choices and neither of them are really appealing. A one piece black suit that covers everything, or a red bikini that Mandy called sexy and bought for me. The little triangles cover most of my cleavage, and the bottoms while are low riding on the hips do cover my butt cheeks. The problem lay in just how much it reveals, leaving very little to the imagination. Knowing Mandy, she will march me back up here and force change me into the bikini. So really, there is no choice. 

Once the suit is on and the feeling of being naked doesn’t evaporate as I had hoped, I cover the suit with cut off shorts and a loose tank. Throwing my frizzy brown hair into a pony tail, I declare myself ready. Just in time to hear a honking. 

Running out the door with a backpack full of necessary items, I call to my grandmother that I will be back later. She yells back to call and check in later, but nothing else. When my eyes lift from the side gate to the car waiting at the curb, my jaw drops to the floor and my feet stop moving. Really there is a good reason for this reaction as my flirty best friend sits in the front seat of a Ram truck waving crazily. 

“Hurry up Willow!” Mandy calls after rolling down the window. 

On their own accord, my feet travel towards the back door which is already propped open for me. I slide into the leather seat making an ugly noise. 

“Hey Willow.” My best friend has lost her mind, or her flirting knows no bounds. 

“Uh, hey Charlie. Kevin.”

Kevin smiles next to me and Charlie turns around in the driver seat, slipping sunglasses back over his eyes before shooting the monster truck forward. 

 

Mandy kept up the chatter enough for the ride not to be too awkward. See, she has this ability to be a chatter box, but she also has the ability to carry a conversation that doesn’t revolve just around her life like most girls do. Her enthusiasm and excitement soon caught on to Charlie, who wouldn’t stop smiling our laughing at anything Mandy said. If he wasn’t such a slut, I would think he actually had a thing for her. 

We arrive at the pool party as it is in full swing. Many upcoming seniors like the four of us are here. None of them I really talk to, at all. Mandy and Charlie disappear to the drink section while Kevin is immediately surrounded by females thriving for his attention. While Charlie is the one to flaunt his appreciation for the opposite sex, Kevin hides his. Sure, he is smiling at all the attention, but deep in his eyes his discomfort is noticeable. 

I take a seat on a lounge chair close to the pool waving Kevin over in order to give him some excuse. My actions are beyond words in my mind, but deep down it’s selfishness on my part. I want a distraction, and since Mandy has dissipated into thin air, Kevin is my last hope. He doesn’t deny my requests.

He does, however, slowly strut over to the empty lounge chair next to me as his arms slowly reach over and take over his shirt. Bad mistake. Now I have joined the asinine club of female gawker. 

“Thanks, for you know.”

“Uh-yeah. Sure.” When our eyes meet, Kevin winks and a blush takes over. I was just caught oogling. Great. 

“You going to take your clothes off? You’ll get a bad tan that way.” 

Kevin leans back on the lounge chair, pulling his arms behind his head. With one simple flick, his sunglasses slip falling over his eyes. I look down at my raggedy clothes, pulling at the loose tank top. 

“Maybe in a little.”

“Your choice.” Kevin shrugs like he doesn’t have a care in the world. He probably doesn’t either. 

Reaching into my backpack, I pull out my own pair of glasses and some sunblock. I have pretty tan skin, but that’s because I am a smart person and actually put on sunblock so my skin doesn’t burn instead. The only problem now is that in a normal person’s world, applying sunblock usually means stripping down to the bathing suit. Turning my back to Kevin and quickly standing up, most of the clothes are discarded and folded at the edge of the lounge chair. As the application process of sunscreen has started, there’s just one tiny problem, who will do my back? Mandy, the ever faithful best friend is usually in charge of that part. I leave my back for last, buying time to see if Many reappears. No such luck. My head whips back and forth in search of her, but there is no sign of blonde hair and blue eyes in a green two piece. 

“Here, let me.” 

Kevin leans up, showing off just how many muscles the guy really does have. Holding out his hand, he shakes it impatiently at me. My mind snaps back to reality knowing i just caught twice in the matter of ten minutes checking him out. The pitter patter of my heartbeat refuses to slow down, and a heat deep down ignites some really hormonal feelings, but I act it off handing the lotion and turning around. There’s a squirt noise, and a snap of the lid being shut closed. The anticipation of feeling his hands on me starts another accelerated breathing process. My chest rises up and down in quick sessions. Just as his hands begin their connection, my skin wants to scream for more. Slowly, the rough hands massage their way over my back side. Starting from my shoulders in slow circular motions, down the sides and just above the top part of the bottom bikini. Once there, Kevin teases my back dimples with a tiny pinch. I near let out a groan of wanting.

“Hot damn! Willow, you look hot enough to eat girl.”

My eyes snap open. Mandy approaches from the right, carrying two plastic red cups. I push myself up and away from Kevin and his seriously alluring, captivating and spellbinding touch. Oh God, what is wrong with me? Me attracted to Kevin? No, no, no. Cannot and will not ever happen.

Mandy stops in between both lounge chairs. Her bandeau top pushes up her C cup breasts, and two tiny strings on the side hold up front and back triangle bottoms. She even is wearing a matching green belly button ring. In other words, Mandy is the one to look hot enough to eat, not me.

“Here.” She pushes a red cup full of slosh in my hand. I look up at her in question. “Margarita time. Charlie has yours Kevin.” Before I can deny the requests of not wanting it, Mandy turns around taking a seat near Kevin’s feet engaging him in conversation. I look down at the slosh and think why not? In the last few summers, Mandy and I have had our moments of drinking the night away into oblivion. Most of the time is when I couldn’t stop thinking about why my mother left, the other time was my father’s two year death anniversary. We didn’t do it every anniversary per say, but we did it whenever those times just grew too unbearable. And didn’t I want a distraction? 

“Bottoms up.” Charlie salutes his own cup, I salute back. The day only starts to begin from there. 

Super Troopers

The white ball soars through the air landing perfectly in the last cup with a simple splash that goes unheard by the roaring crowd. Mandy, using my back for support, jumps up and down yelling incomprehensible drunk words. I think she meant to say “you suck” at one point, but all that came out was “y’sssook.”

“We won!” Mandy shouts, more clearly this time.

“Because of me.” I smirk. Mandy, too drunk to do anything than cheer, had been no help in the floating beer pong game.

“Number one cheering squad. Ah!” Charlie swoops up Mandy in the pool, swaying her around like some sort of princess. I can’t help but wonder what games he is playing