SPACE NOIR BAR by Mike Marino (top books to read txt) 📖

type henchmen and some Clockwork Orange street thugs who we would run into on the way, and it was a daunting dash through Apocalypse Now with a spoonful of Rebel Without a Cause!

 

Our journey would transport us to the mechanical planet of Robotia for a sexy romp of danger and intrigue  that created  one hell of a romance as hot as a sun flare.  Poontangs body and passion heat could melt the polar bears polar ice caps along with their sizable polar bear balls and freeze the hard-ons in the bordellos of Bangkok..ever been banged in Bangkok before? As for Poontang? She  was beautiful and talented and as i would experience, she had a vagina as strong as a steel trap.

 

We planned to leave the gravitational pull of Retropolis in two days. That would give me time to pack for the trip , turn my caseload notes over to Sandoz and get  wasted on Retropolin Soma and laid by a human female with the normal number of body parts (no alien hookers from the Martian Mustang Ranch or an Eroti-bot ...no assembly or batteries required) one more time at the Space Noir Bar, the dive I owned in Detroit in which to drown delightfully dissipated in and deliriously debauched without having a life preservers of emotions involved.  Wham Bam Thank You Ma’am!

Chapter 4 - Lesbian Revolt & Robot Hell

I was packing up for the journey to the Ninth Gate of Robot Hell, when “it” suddenly hit me like a ton of space dung from a herd of pink and blue two headed Zharkovian zoo zebras from the  Buster Crabbe Cluster! The “it” being was where it was I had seen Poontang Pemalang before. (Don’t get me wrong...I’ve seen plenty of general “poontang” but not anyone even close to Poontang Pemalang herself, specifically!) In the dense mind numbing fog of my saloon drunks, fantastic derailing  deliriums doing demented dances at a mental prom night, combined with the tranquility of too many  tranquilizer trances, the media events that surrounded her almost  eluded me, but, now it all came rushing  at me with the  impact of a Norman Mailer one page left hook description of a vagina.

 

Poontang Pemalang had emerged from the primordial covert “dirty tricks” Retropolin era  during the uprising of the Lesbian Rebellion  where the Sexy Sappho’s tried to break the balls of the Retropolin government  in order to declare total auto-erotic autonomy  and create their own girl on girl land of labia libido. The short lived insurrection was commonly  known as  “The Lez-Erection.” The “rebels” were gaining ground, but soon their cadre was infiltrated by a beautiful alluring agent of the Com-Reds from the Asian Red Sector in order to obtain information on their game plan for victory to  crush the revolt. The dykes were doomed.

 

The agent? Yep!  Pontang Pemalang! She along with her comrade  sister in arms, Sappho Strangelove...a  double agent working for the German  sector. Sappo  was good, delicious in fact from what I had heard.  She did have one quizzical quirk in her personality that turned what could have been a minus factor into a plus factor in her line of spy vs. spy work.  Sappho who was at times as mad as a hatter as she had been diagnosed in a Munich mental hospital as having a multiple personality disorder. Split personalities had managed to forge a gang of Gestalt laden Gestapo Death Head Dead Heads who inhabited her psyche, imprisoning her in a shithole Schindler’s List concentration camp cabaret of schizophrenic voices in her head.

 

In time Sappho had effectively mastered the art of bringing to the surface the individual  personality from the mental dumpster  of Picasso persons  inhabiting her, rent free, that would best get the undercover job done. One minute she could be “Dr. Strangelove”….the next...a  tempting delicious Bavarian cream pie with enough sex appeal to breakdown the old Berlin Wall with half an orgasm. Are orgasms organic? Health food that’s not just for breakfast anymore? If so, make mine a double.

 

Both Poontang and Sappho were Com-Reds best agents. Retropolis was after all a Com-red Planet. Conquered by.those merry men and women of Old Communism. Communism, Socialism and its offshoot -isms had not  been wiped off the face of the planet after the cataclysmic Draconian Satellite Drone War of 2525. In fact, they grew proportionately larger and stronger as the Gulag Goliath devoured their former adversaries faster than a speeding laser ray shot from a satellite in space!

 

Western democracies that had reigned supreme cloning third world colonies for centuries folded like a cheap  Sears suit after getting trampled under the heavy boots of the Eastern Sphere of Influence of the Red East and it’s army of mechanized mercenaries. Fighting machines supplied by the  planet Robotia it turns out, arms dealers to the stars, (literally!) and the highest bidders from Triangulum to Centaurus A.  Robotia was also the planet I was about to venture to in search of Poontangs  lost or abducted and in any case missing  sister she feared was being transformed into a Robotian Machina prostitute. Forget Robo Cop. These were mechanical sex machines who could overload the libidinous circuits of a human male or female at the speed of sexual light.

The victors of the RED East, with the help of Robotian intrigues and arms  became a virus of the vanquished Western leaning planets.  Over time both became one as borders disappeared, absorbed by the Com-Reds, rendering global geo patterns vanished into an invisible  vortex. Strict regulations and global government swallowed whole ideologies as smooth as a cheerleader gives a blowjob under the bleachers. The “left” was all that WAS left...as the right gave up it’s right to exist thanks to liquidation, sedation, re-education, intimidation, coercion, firing squads,  and exile.

Today in the 26th Cent politics and sex, as always, still makes the merry world go on a merry go-round romp, and when you do it by political leanings I find the left as a governing body is as strict as a Mother Superior with PMS but the yang to the yin is that sexually the left is so much sexier than I could imagine the right could ever be! The Left has always been and still is a striptease act with as many costumes as there are fighting factions.  The Com-Red female is a sexy Minsk minx stripped down  on a rim-shot runway to a g-string Hong Kong Viet Cong King Kong thong exposing a hint of  a super nova pubic clit cluster t come. The thong once removed can induce an orbital orgasm on the mental, physical and spiritual planes.

 

Liberal Democrats will straddle the fence, and being of a cautious nature will not spread their legs too far apart, and those madcap Libertarians will talk about sex, but still will be more comfortable masturbating. The liberal Democrats will only let you down in bed

 

In the Solar System of Planetary Socialism, I find that a socialist from Saturn will talk all the way through the sexual act to the point of orgasm, thereby ruining any mood that may have tried to bubble to the Saturnalia surface for erection eruption, but on the upside they will want to include as many people under the covers to share the sexual wealth! You know, a sense of Plutonian Utopian Community. So forget a threesome….you might end up with ten alien participants in perfect sexual alignment, each and all with 10 different theories of how to achieve a sexual climax that is fair for everyone!

 

At the far-out far end, you’ve gone too far off the political spectrum, a damned  Andromedan anarchist will want to explode an Asteroidal suicidal device first to get in the mood and then make you read hefty lefty leaflets on how to screw an anarchist in 10 easy steps. However Comrade, do you want an erection as vast as the Rings of Saturn? Do you want to have a Super Nova explode in your bootleg spacesuit in the Kremlin?

 

If the answer is Yes..then get in your time travel pod and head on back to the old, ancient, forgotten former USSR! Those Moscow Girls will knock you out…

In the 20th Cent Das Kapital was not exactly the Kama Sutra and the ABC’s of the KGB did not add up to a  romp under the hammer and sickle bed covers. You could have a go with a steamy Socialist from Slovenia but a vagina from the Volga gave a command performance.

 

The Global Galactic Communist lover of my century does it for the party, so party on! Your hammer and her sickle could make for some red banner red star non-Tsar sex one of the most exciting experiences since East Germans tried to breach the Berlin Wall to freedom in the old days. The Communist girl of today will also use protection..red star sponges of course to block the little infiltrators from scoring a hit in the Motherland. Sometimes she will not use protection and will let the little sperm defect to the other side...so don’t get stalled in Stalingrad..keep pushing...Now that is how you fuck a communist.

 

Poontang  was a covert agent during the Lez-Erection Uprising, and a damned good one too and brought the lesbos to their knees. Not surprising, as this Com-Red babe was as red hot as a comet and she had the tail to prove it. The revolution was soon extinguished  allowing her to return to her home base now famous  as the “Vixen of the Volga”  before heading across the Bering Straits, the land bridge from Asia to the West to her ancestral home of what was once Canada. She was the by-product of an  Asian mother and an Eskimo inseminator as Fathers are now referred to. They  met in Manitoba and banged in Banff. Poontang was the pleasant placenta wrapped result. With her background and contacts and fame, I wondered as I stared into my broken mirror where I kept all the images of my broken dreams...why did she  need me to help her find her sister? The plot thickened faster than coagulating blood from a head wound from a .38.

Poontang my Com-Red Asia-kimo client was rich, famous and sexy and could give Lenin a hard-on as he lay in state (yes, he’s still there!) and let’s face it. I wanted to find her G spot tucked away in her Red Square..I found my Com-red in a closet..in the 20th Century  you could only find a red star gold star vagina in places such as the old USSR...Vietnam….North Korea...China...or Cuba...and Madison, Wisconsin...Sex Workers of the World..UNITE! The next time you run into a commie bombshell..don’t say Fuck You….say it loud and say it proud...FUCK ME!!!.