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and I look at the scene surrounding me. I slowly pass the old bird bath that was only a stone plate balancing on a high tree stump. I have never seen anything different than this; the bird bath has been there since I was born.
I am walking towards the hammock that is connected to two tall trees. The hammock, like the bird bath, was old and worn out. The blue and green color had faded, yet it was still durable. I lay myself in the swinging cloth and look straight up. There is an opening between the trees and I could see the sky. There is almost no white in the sky, but the blue was still beautiful. I look at the gorgeous sky until I am interrupted by a splashing noise. I looked to my left and the red bird was in bath now. As it splashes around, and it picks at its wing. The bird had a certain expression on his face. He looks happy. Maybe because of the water that is rarely there or maybe because the day is a superb day to be flying around.
I look up from the bird and saw the small bat house that was connected to the side of my house. It looks like a very small boxed house with a narrow roof, a little whole for the bats to go in and out and a picture of a bat above the entrance. I have seen many bats in my backyard, they really are interesting creatures. I have heard people say that bats are like birds at night.
In the real world things like this don’t happen, but in this world, in my backyard, everything is perfect.
My eyes keep drifting off, not because I am tired, but because I am so relaxed. I lay there with my eyes closed my mind on nothing. I wasn’t thinking of anything, but I can feel everything. The wind against my skin, the rough hammock below me. I can hear the tree’s brushing against each other, the grass moving, even the cars from the busy street far away. At this moment, I am at ease and nothing can get me out of this feeling. This is the best feeling I have had since Charlie passed away. This is the way she made me feel, I miss this feeling so much.
My eyes slowly open as the thought of Charlie came back to me. This is the most peaceful place in my life, and this was where I saw her soul. The feeling is gone. I sit up and adjust myself to my feet. I shouldn’t be here if I don’t feel the way I did.
I walk faster and faster up the stairs, and towards the door. I was scared. I forgot that the backyard was where I saw Charlie’s soul. Walking around my deck I grab my backpack and open the door. My mother is standing there with a handful of trash bags.
“Oh! Hey Ray. Do you mind?” She hands me a trash bag.
“Sure. How was your day mom?” My mother and I are closer than most parents to their children. She always tells me I’m all she has. My brother won’t talk to her, he won’t talk to anyone. She was married to my father, but he had an affair. It tore her to pieces. I could never have that happen to me. If I ever get married, it will be to that one woman that I would give anything too and do anything for. I would love her with all of my heart, and trust her completely. To think if that one person that is supposed to fill those holes between your fingers had feeling for someone else is heart breaking. Just thinking about the love of my life holding another person in their arms, and not me, kills me.
I feel so bad for my mom, and I’ll always be here for her and not betray her like my father did. I hate him so much. He left the family when I was two, so I never got to really know him. My brother only remembers a few things about my father. If I ever met him there is so many things I want to do to him, so many things I want to say to him.
My mom was now finishing with the great story she was telling about her day, though I wasn’t really listening. Walking back inside I tell her about my day and what we are doing in all of our classes.
“Mom, today during math Mich and I talked.”
“Oh, Mich. How is he?” I can tell she really doesn’t care about him. In the 5th grade he brought his pet Ginny pig over and it got lost in the house. We found it a few months later dead in the laundry room. The disturbing smell is what helped us find it.
“He’s good. So, we were talking and him and a few of our friends are going camping this weekend. I was wondering if I could go.” Asking this in an almost pleading tone sounded really desperate. This is how people know I have no friends.
“When are y’all leaving?”
“Friday. We will come back Sunday morning” She is looking at me with a glaze. I’m not really sure what that means.
“Where is it?” She says cautiously.
“Fort Austin, on the lake.” I say with a little hesitant because I know that Fort Austin is quite a way away. Also, in the middle of nowhere.
She pauses for a moment, “Sure, you can go. Just be careful. Will you be leaving right after school on Friday?”
“Yes.” I am smiling more than I have in a while. Like I said, this will help get my mind off of Charlie and it will be fun.
“The doctor said you were healthy today.”
“I know mom… I was there” My mom doesn’t trust doctors anymore because our doctor told us that my sister had a few more years to live before she died 2 days later. “I’m fine mom. Don’t worry.” I hug her.
Five



I haul my bag and sleeping bag into the back of the van. It is finally Friday and we are all standing in the school parking lot waiting for Joe to show up.
Jessica is sitting in the van with her feet hanging out almost touching the ground. Jessica is tall with straight blonde hair that hits all the way down to her waist. She is skinny, not the type of skinny that is gross to look at, but the small-boned skinny. She was wearing a white v-neck shirt and blue shorts. This was the type of style the girls wore throughout school.
Mich is leaning against the van with keys in his hand. “I don’t know… my mom is just like that” He says to Jessica. I walk around from the back of the van and sit next to Jessica.
“Well, I think she is just trying to look out for you Mich, I mean, she not grounding you because she hates you.” Jessica replies.
“You’re grounded?” I ask Mich.
“Well, yeah. Not for this weekend though. She already told me I could go out.”
“Why are you grounded?”
“He was smoking on his front porch.” Jessica answers me with a little sarcasm.
I laugh. “Dude, if you’re going to smoke, then do it in a place that isn’t so out there. Anyone could have seen you smoking on your front porch.”
Jessica laughs too “Exactly! You might as well just be smoking in their bed room.”
“It’s not like they were home.” Mich said. “They were out to dinner and if I saw them pull up I would have done something about it, but they tried to purposely catch me doing it.”
“Wait… what? They tried to catch you? So your parents knew you smoked anyway.” I say, moving to let Jessica readjust her feet.
“I guess. They’ve never said anything to me before. They like, drove down the street without their headlights on. I thought they were some sketchy sophomores just learning how to drive or something. So many goddamn people from our school live on my street. It’s annoying.”
“Are they going to drug test you?” Jessica asks.
“They caught him with the weed, I think they already know.” I say jokingly.
Jessica laughs. “There he is!” I looked over to where she was pointing. Joe is holding a bag, a cooler and another bag that fits a tent. I walk toward him to help.
“Hey man.” He says. I take the cooler. “Thanks.” We walk towards the van as he says hi to Mich and Jessica. I went to the back and open the trunk.
“Um…” I say with question. The trunk was full.
“Mich! Where do you want us to put this stuff?” Mich walks to the back, and laughs.
“Well… shit.” Mich looks around. “Where’s Nikki? Maybe we can put stuff in her car. “
Jessica replies. “She said she would meet us there, so I don’t think that’s going to work.”
I look at Joe. “This sucks.”
“Hey well maybe we can keep our bags in the back seat and put this stuff in the trunk.” Joe suggests.
“Yeah, my bag is in the back seat anyway” I say. We all move around situating our things and finally get it to where the doors would close without anything hanging out.
“Well, that was unnecessary. Why didn’t we just do that before?” Jessica says to me. I laugh. We all hope in the car, Mich driving first. Joe in the passenger seat leaving me and Jessica in the back two seats. We drive out of the school and down the main street of the town. Passing the shopping centers, the mall, the grocery store and a few restaurants. We exit onto the highway and start on our way. Joe puts in a CD and we all listen to it talking about the music throughout Austin. That’s what I love about these people. They know their music. We talk about how many years’ we have been going to the well known Austin City Limits. Jessica falls asleep holding her legs. I knew she was cold so I get a blue blanket out of the back and place it around her.
“She is beautiful isn’t she?” Mich says looking at her through the review mirror. Jessica and Mich have been dating since 8th grade year. I wouldn’t be surprised if they get married. It’s sad though because he is so attached to her. If she isn’t at school one day he gets depressed and doesn’t talk to anyone. I don’t like to see people like that. It makes me feel bad for them because they obviously can’t live on their own and that’s not a good thing. He would kill himself if she left him… sometimes

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