Untitled(for now) by Tiffany Anyel (elon musk reading list txt) 📖

I hear a knock on my door. I jump. "Yin, who you talking to? I hear mumbling. If its Gary, tell him, I told you, to tell him goodbye." I realized I was talking out loud. Or atleast mumbling, as Terry put it. "Okay." I hear footsteps on the stairs. You still there? "Yes." So, you can still hear me, even if I dont speak? "Yes. If you want me to." I realized I did. "Good." So, you can hear my every thought? "No, that would drive me crazy." I laugh out loud. I immediately remember Terry, and stifle my laugh. Your funny. "You think so?" Yes I do. I feel him smile. "How do you do that?" "What?" "Show me what you are doing, without showing me?" "Oh, that. Well its you really." No, its not. Somehow I felt you. Not me. "Thats not what I meant." Okay, what did you mean? "You see more than just with your eyes." Oh. I realized I had been sitting there for awhile, trying to figure that one out. "Need help?" I smile. Do I even need to answer? He laughs. "You see with feeling. You are open enough to allow other senses sight. The eyes are not the only sense that can see." But thats what I was taught. "I know." So, is it like a super power? "That depends." Yea.. "Well, what do you mean by super power?" Am I special? "Yes, you are. But not for the reason you think." I realized I had been waiting for him to continue, when one of my legs start to ache. I put my pad and pen in the drawer. Turn off the lamp. I am laying in bed, looking at the ceiling.

Lying here, I couldnt help but think. I'll admit, the mind is a beautiful thing, but sometimes it falls short. I mean it can only take you so far. Hear I am, having a conversation with someone. Who I cant see. But definitely feel. Dont know. But then again, I do. I mean I may not know his name or where he grew up or his life story. But I cant shake this feeling, that I know him somehow. Like the actual person. All my mind has done is tell me how crazy I am. And how I should get checked out. I laugh. Its funny. And all my body seems to feel, is the complete opposite. Like it hasnt felt this alive in ages, if ever. And my senses, well apparently, they can also see and hear. Who knows what else. And without using the actual body parts assigned to those positions. I take a breath. I close my eyes. I think I have had enough to process for one day. Last thing I remember is
looking at the clock.


Author's note: This is in the very early stages of editing/writing (there will be changes-I'm sure). Also the following chapters are 'untitled' I haven't gotten around(doubt set in and I stopped :() to finding the names and re-editing/changing what I have wrote.


3

"Yin!" Silence. "Yin! Get up!" Knocking on the door. "Yin, if you dont answer me, I will open this door right now!" Huh? "Ok. Glenda Im up!" I rub my eyes. And fall back into the pillow. I sigh. I dont remember falling asleep. I dont even remember dreaming. I turn to the clock. "Yin, can I come in?" "Yea." She lays laundry on my bed. "Thanks." She frowns. "Your old enough to do your own laundry." "And I do." "Then why do I seem to always be." "Because everything has to be done on your time." "It does not." "Okay." "Are you trying to be funny?" "What?" "I know what that 'okay' stands for." "Okay." "See!" She throws a pillow at me. I laugh. She smiles, and shuts the door. I check my phone. One message. Gary telling me to call him later, and to not forget. I realize its a Saturday. I dont get to see the boys til Monday. Maybe I can do something with him later. I head to the bathroom.

In my room, I find a tshirt and some jeans. I put them on. Grab my scrunchie from the nightstand. And pull my hair up. Ahh..thats better. I look out my window. Cloudy. Grey. Wet. I look in my closet for my comfy hoodie. I stuff my cigarettes and phone in its pockets, and shut the door. I hear a noise in the kitchen. "So your finally up?" "No. Im still sleeping." "You got jokes." "Apparently, you want one?" "Whats up your butt?" "I dont know, you wanna see?" "Yin, cut it out." I stifle a laugh, and look in the frig. "What are you looking for?" I ignore her and grab the milk. I realize she is mixing something, without a mixer. That was the noise. "Excuse me." "What do you need?" "Why do you always have to pester me?" "Pester? Really Yin?" "Shut up, its all I got." She laughs. And moves, so I can grab a spoon. I reach for a bowl. "So what are you making?" I look at her. She stifles a laugh. Hmm..Capn' Crunch. I begin to eat. "Yin?" I dont look up. "No, seriously." I look at her. "Whats wrong?" "Besides you pestering me? Nothing." I make sure to enunciate the word pester. "Yea, okay." "Why do you think something is wrong?" "Cause your frowning. You havent smiled once." I smile. "Yin! Im serious." "I dont know." She pours batter in a dish, and puts it in the oven. The phone rings. "St. Marys Home for Children..." I tune her out.

I didnt really know why I was in such a stinky mood. Its not like I planned it. I hadnt even realized it was stinky, til she mentioned it. I didnt really feel bad. Like depression type bad. I just felt..ugh. Ugh. It was one of those ugh days. I have to do something to get me out of this. I need a cigarette. I put my dish in the washer. And head for the back door. I am on the swing, staring out, feeling comfort from the rain, when my phone rings. Its Gary. "Hello." "Hey, what you doing?" "Smoking." "Ugh." "Yea, ugh." "Whats wrong with you?" "Ive been trying to figure that one out. Im okay though. I guess just bored, maybe?" "You wanna hang out later?" "Maybe, if I feel up to it. What you have in mind?" "Board games, cards?" "Yay, okay." I immediately find myself smiling. "Thanks Gair." "For what?" "Giving me my first actual smile of the day." "Aww.. I think that is the sweetest thing you have ever said to me." "What about the time, I told you, you had beautiful hair?" "Yea, but that was after you told me, you didnt really like the highlights." "Hey you asked, I answered. I adored your natural color. You didnt need 'highlights'" I put up quotations signs, despite the obvious. "Brown? I needed a new look." "Well I didnt quite adore that look. You looked like you were trying too hard." "Trying to hard?" "Yea, trying to look better. You already do Gair" "Aww.." We both laugh. "I think that was a kodak moment." I smile.

"So what was up with you yesterday?" "What do you mean?" "You were acting like a giddy school girl." "Who just got asked to prom?" "What?" "By the guy she has liked since forever?" "Yin, what are you talking about?" "Nothing. I always act like a giddy school girl." "True. But yesterday, I dont know. You were different." "How?" "Have you met someone?" I pause. "You have." "I didnt say that." "Well? have you?" "Why do you think I met someone?" "Cause you were starry-eyed. Like all day." "Whatever." "You were, Id catch you smiling, looking like you were thinking about 'a special someone'. Even Pete thought so." "What?" "Yea, he said he found you staring behind the building, lost in thought." "Well I was admiring the trees. They're beautiful." "I know, but you see those trees, those same trees, almost everyday. And he said, you were looking like you were seeing them for the first time. Yin?" "What?" "Have. you. met. someone.?" "Why do you think.." "You have already asked that. Are you trying to dodge the question? You are! So whats his name?" "How do you know its a he?" "Well have you switched sides?" "Oh." "Oh. what?" "Nothing." I put out my cigarette. "I dont have a side. 'This boat', 'that boat'..yada, yada.. If it rocks your boat, swing with it." "There you go 'metaphor-ing' again." I laugh. "Hey its what I do."

I go inside. Grab a blanket, and plop on the couch. "Are you going to answer the question?" "I dont know, okay?" "You dont know? How do you not know?" "Well I havent actually seen him." "You havent actually seen him..Oh, you met someone online? Who didnt have a profile pic? And you decided to talk with this person?" I realized this was an opportunity to talk about him, without having to explain, how I couldnt explain, how I met him. I take it. "Yea, so?" "And are you sure its a him?" I pause. "He definitely feels...masculine." "Yin, havent I told you anything about the dangers of..what do u mean by 'feels masculine'?" "You know, like it feels like a him, not a her. You know masculine, feminine.." "Yin, you can never be sure online. I mean you'd be surprised how many times, I have been surprised." "I dont mean gender Gair." "Well isnt that what we are talking about?" "I mean..energy? He just felt like a him, okay?" "Okay, moving on. So, whats his name?" "I dont know that either." "What? Okay wait a minute. You havent seen this person, and you dont know his name? Did you tell him yours?" "No." "Thank god! Yin are you crazy? I say drop him, or whoever it might be." "Oh, whatever Gair, not everyone is out to get you. And you dont even know what it was like. He was like. It was fun." "Fun?" "Yea, he had me laughing." "Yin you laugh at anything." I laugh. "See." "Whatever, he just felt different. I liked it. Him." "Like..like, like?" " Yea. I feel.. attracted to him." I realized I did. "His a mystery." "Yea, well see, that can get you into to trouble.Just be careful, kay?" "You know I will." "And try to get more than just, he made me laugh, next time. You know like a name, photo, something." "I'll try?" "Try?" "Okay Gair." "I mean it Yin." "Okay, okay." "I'll call you later, kay?" " Kay." We hang up.

I blow out air. Garys right. I mean, I dont know so much. Name, photo, these were the least of my issues. I didnt even know, if I knew, he was real. I turn my head, and look out the window. I