It's Your Baby by Belén Domínguez (any book recommendations txt) 📖

I want is to be with someone right now, sorry” I said, my voice cracking. She nodded in understanding and gave me one last hug.

 

“I understand, Gwen, take all the time you need” and with that, she left. . .I stayed there, alone in my room, tears kept rolling down, though I tried to calm down. My phone buzzed in my nightstand, and I slowly went to pick it up. I was mentally exhausted, I felt like someone was stabbing me over and over again. My legs were weak and I just wanted to go back in the past and avoid ever talking to Finn fucking Harries.

 

I picked up my phone, I rubbed at my nose and then stared at the Caller's ID.

 

Finn.

 

Finn fucking Harries was calling me. I groaned and frowned at the screen. How is it possible that he still has the nerve of calling me? He should've told me about this sooner, before leading me on, pretending to actually feel something for me. I wanted to smash my phone against the wall, but that wouldn't help my case either. I pressed the phone to my ear, my hand was shaking and lip quivering.

 

“Babe, hey, I was thinking that we could—” he started but of course I wouldn't let him finish, not this time.

 

“Listen to me, Harries. I don't want you to call me ever again, you hear me?”

 

“What?”

 

“Don't play innocence with me, I just can't believe I lost my time with someone as selfish and conceited as you! You are the worst human being I have ever encounter in my entire fucking life!” I said, wiping at my tear stained cheeks, balling my fists as I kept thinking of what he did. Every time it crossed my mind, I felt even more stupid.

 

“What are you talking about—”

 

“You know exactly what I'm talking about, you've known since the beginning, and you didn't have the balls to tell me. You're a coward, you're a fucking coward! I know everything!”

 

He was a moment in silence before answering. “I can explain—”

 

“Don't bother, just don't. . .” my voice failed, and it was breaking. I stared at the ground, trying to even my breath.

 

“Baby, Gwen, listen to me, please—”

 

“Fuck you!” and with that, I hung up. I was breathing heavily, my chest rising up and down. I just had to get out of there. I rushed out my room and to the front door, receiving concerned looks from Alec.

 

“Gwen, wait up!” he said, running towards me. I stopped but didn't turn around. I wiped my eyes and stayed silent.

 

“Gwen, what's wrong? What happened?” he asked trying to make me turn around but I didn't even budge. “Gwen?”

 

“Nothing!” I snapped. “I just need fresh air, okay?”

 

“Something is obviously bothering you and I need to know what is” he said, which made me turn around.

 

“Nothing is wrong with me, I just—” I couldn't finish that sentence as I kept crying, I can't believe how stupid I was, how fucking stupid I was to think that Finn could be different from the rest. Alec hugged me, kissing the top of my head. I cried into his shirt, trying to calm down.

 

“I don't want to talk about it, okay?” I said, when we pulled away. He nodded, but that didn't take away the concern on his face.

 

“Come on, I can make you my special milkshake just for you” he said, but I shook my head at his offer. I wasn't in the mood for milkshakes—surprisingly—I needed to get out of this house, to get my mind off that brown-eyed boy.

“It sounds very appealing, but I truly want to get fresh air” I said, he nodded and hugged me one last time. I forced a smile, to make him stop worrying about me. I can't stand to see him looking at me like that, specially not in the situation I'm in. I walked towards the entrance and finally got out. The wind blowing at my face, it made me feel slightly better, but not enough. The stinging in my chest doesn't stop and I just want to escape from all this, but I can't, I'm into deep to actually disappear.

 

I started walking, where? Don't ask me, I just don't have the answer. I just want to clear my mind, to get my head out of here for just a moment. But, the constant reminder that Finn basically betrayed me, replayed in my head like a scratched CD. God, I want it to stop. I received multiple looks from people, but you know what? I couldn't care less. I know I looked like crap, but I have a reason for it, I have my personal life, and the fact people were staring at me and judging me with their looks, annoyed the living hell out of me. With folded arms and tear stained cheeks, I kept walking. With time I will get my answers as to where I should be, where I should go, what should I do. Though I know one thing, one specific thing. . .I don't want to hear from Finn fucking Harries ever again.

 

Chapter 49 - This Isn't Over

Finn's P.O.V

 

Fuck.

 

Fuck.

 

Fuck.

 

This can't be happening. . .Not like this, God no. I can't believe she knows everything. I mean, I knew it was coming, but I should've been the one to tell her about this. I should've told her that I was stupid for posting that, for lying to millions of people, I should've told her that I was sorry, that I would make it up to her. And then this happened, just like Cameron predicted. I am such an asshole. I am a disgusting person, a lying bastard, a conceited jerk, a selfish idiotic, and pathetic human being. God, I hate myself so much right now. But, not as much as she hates me in this exact moment.

 

Half of my mind tells me I should give her time, to let her cool down. After hearing her curse like that—which she never does—I should just stay away for a few days before speaking to her again. But the other stubborn part of me tells me that I should go to her house right now and apologize for my fucked up actions, to explain to her that I do actually care for her, a lot.

 

Before I know it, I'm grabbing my car keys and rushing out the door. I kept thinking in all of the things I could say, anything that can make this any better. But then I started thinking what an idiot I am since there's no fucking way I can make this situation improve. She hates me, I know, she doesn't want to know anything about me, I felt it in her voice. I got inside my car, and hit the steering wheel.

 

“Dammit!” I screamed out in frustration. “Shit, what am I doing?” I asked aloud. I scratched the back of my head and started the engine, driving as fast as I could to Gwen's house. I grabbed my phone and dialed her number. I left her like 7 missed calls, 2 voicemails, and 5 text messages, but nothing. She didn't answer me at all.

 

• • •

 

When I got there, I bolted towards the main door as fast as my legs would allow me to. I rang the doorbell and basically pounded on the door multiple times. Minutes later, Alec opened it, giving me a confused look.

 

“I need to speak to Gwen” I said, urgently.

 

He folded his arms, “Gwen's not here” was his reply.

 

“Where is she?” I asked, getting annoyed with every passing second.

 

“She wanted fresh air so she went for a walk. You don't know what is going on with her? Because she was crying and pissed. If you know anything, you have to tell me”

 

“If I tell you, you would kill me” I said. He furrowed his eyebrows in confusion and his arms fell to his sides.

 

“Excuse me? What did you say? I swear if you did anything to my little sister you will pay for it”

 

“I know, but I truly need to talk to her, I am just as worried as you are for her. . .And if I don't find her, everything will get worst”

 

“Can you please explain what the fuck is going on? You are getting on my nerves, Harries” he said, through gritted teeth.

 

“There's not time to explain, alright? I have to find your sister" I started walking towards my car and quickly got in, receiving multiple confused looks by Alec, but I didn't have time right now. I only have one mission: Finding Gwen. I always needed to mess everything up, why am I such an idiot? If I would've told her the truth, then none of this would've happen, she would still be here, with me.

 

I searched nearly everywhere, but nothing, she's nowhere to be found and I'm getting worried. Where the hell would she go?

 

Dammit. Dammit. Dammit.

 

If I was a heartbroken girl, where would I go? I squeezed my brain trying to think of all the possibilities for where to search. I am worried sick, I mean, I know she's crying right now, I feel it. Of course, I knew she would get upset—even more than that—if she would ever find out. But, if she is crying and hurt right now, anyone could take advantage of that opportunity. A broken girl, a pregnant broken girl, suffering. She's too vulnerable right now to go wander in the streets alone.

 

I just pray that she's okay and doesn't get hurt because of my stupidity.

 

Gwen's P.O.V

 

I inhale the fresh air and closed my eyes tightly, as I enjoyed of the peacefulness. I believed the park would be the perfect place—the perfect quiet place, for me to think. I wiped my eyes, few tears escaping from it. The stinging in my chest is nearly unbearable, and I can't help to think how stupid I was. All those moments I've shared with him, with Nash, are rushing to my mind all of a sudden.

When he looks at me, when he smiles, when he hugs me, was it all lie? I can't believe him. . .I can't believe how he played me like that. I truly thought we had something, that he actually felt something for me. And that makes my heart ache even more. I was so dumb to believe that he could have feelings for a simple girl like me, when he already has like every single girl in the palm of his hand. 

I was sitting in a bench, staring as the little kids played in the swings or running around, plus some couples walking by holding hands.

I wish that this pain could go away. I hate that I let him lead me on. I wanted to scream at him, to insult him, to even punch him. I wanted to do a million things. . .But most of all, I just wish I could forget him. I wanted to forget his dazzling eyes, his warm hugs, his tender kisses. Ugh, I wanted to forget our first night together. I should've just walk away the minute he sat down next to me.

“Gwen?” I heard someone from behind me. I didn't have to turn around to know who it was.

“Finn, leave” I said weakly.

“I was worried sick” he